Snow Way: no where

Some locales are hemispherically challenged and can only see Xmas snow on Turner Classic Movies or Lifetime Channel. Does that make you sing? Does it?

Branded Duo have a nice country irony in “White Christmasses in Houston.” No snow. Nice swing.

Boogie Woogie zydeco from Allen Toussaint, “The Day It Snows on Christmas” posits the sad impossibility of a White Loozey-Anna Christmas.

Bombadil is more alt pop with “No Snow in the Valley.” Less Christmas, more message.

No Snow for Christmas” is Tracey Jane Smith’s Xmas card for family from her hellish hole in Florida. They have it rough playing in the pool, and watch out for the last couple minutes of home movies. Roy Peter Clark also pisses and moans about “Christmas Without Snow” in Florida. He does sing slightly better than the Smith children. Piano bar.

The Tropical Christmas (No Snow? It Doesn’t Bother Me)” is old Brit music hall rock and while it doesn’t get destination specific, makes the point party-ifically.

Nā Hoa ship us to more tropics with “Christmas Without Snow.” Hawaiian yodeling.

Electronica reggae! Billy Paul Williams raises the truth with “No Snow in Jamaica.” Testify!

Is this political? “No Snow in Africa This Christmas” from Puddock Stew is unplugged protest folkrock.

Mr. O gets gnarly with “Christmas in Hong Kong.” No snow is part of the angst he rocks off his chest.

Snow Way: just say no BLUE ALERT

The lack of snow is not just another day in December… it makes a statement.

Reese Lansangan is one of those talents you can’t understand is only on Youtube. Her fluent folk pop “No Snow” makes you believe in the poetry of young love.

Anuhea sings “No Snow” as exotic island beat, which makes you wonder how do they know about snow?

More hula-inspired honky tonk in “No Snow for Christmas” from Maureen McElheron.

Brian Protheroe has to make “No Snow Blues” about not getting love, but it’s so bluesy.

Blues rock from Lucky Luke in the form of “No Snow This Christmas.” Makes Elvis cry.

Graffiti6’s “No Snow” goes jazzy wailing over that loss of that girl that time of year.

Stephen Simmons gets cynical with “No Snow on the Ground.” Jazz ballad hates Xmas.

Stefanie Eskew bemoans inappropriate tropical paradises with her hard folk “No Snow.”

Pet Shop Boys, yes the most successful recording duo from the UK, bemoan the lack of standardization with “It Doesn’t Often Snow at Christmas.” It’s meant to do, y’see. Synthpop.

Boon & Millz make the Whoville case “No Snow for Christmas“: love only, nuttin else.

Ditto from NexCyx’s R+B pop “We Don’t Have Snow.” But they do have Christmas cliches!

Etc. from James Henson and his backroom amateur “There’s No Snow at Christmas.” We get it, especially via dad folk rock.

Celine Rae & The 20-73 party rock us with “Christmas Without Snow.” Now it’s all okay.

Chris Messtree (fet. Nico Laus) (yeah, it’s a joke) go prog electronic with “No Snow for Christmas.” BLUE ALERT German influenced chanting, so it like it.

Joe Pesci has a cute novelty number “If It Doesn’t Snow on Christmas” (A cover of the Gene Autry ’49 semi-hit). Have you heard the BLUE ALERT naughty version?!

Snow Way: hate it

Tired of all the snow? Starting to hate it? Want to go after it with the curling iron? Then listen….

G. Salvia says it outright: “I Hate the Friggin’ Snow!” Home grown rock strumming, ahuh. Fishing God Productions has a better version.

Bill Morgan goes so far as to say “I Hate Snow” but he means Christmas snow. Showtune with Russian influences.

John Mitchell opens the door to parodies. His ‘Let It Snow’ take off “I Hate Snow” delivers what his funny uncle mustache promises.

Lorelei Savaryn continues the parody parade with “I Hate Snow” as a ‘Let It Go’ parody. Slightly more wit, certainly a longer song. Howard Teschner, too.

The “No Snow Song” posted by ronniebus is parody of Ringo’s ‘No No Song’ but i still think it’s good. Listen.

skwank has posted a charming Brit punk screamer “I Hate Snow.” Mildly jolly profanity.

John Wayne Donovan gooses his inner Elvis for “I Hate Snow.” Leans into that guitar good.

Canadian teen Austin Thomas confides “I Really Hate Snow.” Northern bluegrass fun.

Steven Lyons gargles his country singing for “Santa, I Hate the Snow.” Be a man.

Wendy Jans strings along the country sound to a soulful “Don’t Let it Snow.” Some range.

Tampa Stan tries to be funny with “I Hate Snow.” Oompah rock.

Reacting to a messed up year (tragedy?) alexxx sings “I Hate Snow” and everything that goes with it. So there.

Snow Way: too too too

Can’t stop the snow! Must adapt or play!

Children’s Christmas Songs and Stories frolics with “The Snow is Here to Stay.” Upbeat.

Wm. Fitzsimmons whispers gentle alt-folk with “Covered in Snow.” You’ll learn to love it.

Hot Buttered Elves get dangerously garage with “Too Much Snow.” Drugs were involved.

Nipsey deals out protest rockabilly with “Too Much Snow.” He might mean on the TV.

Peter Vesth plays some lounge country ‘with friends’ for “Too Much Snow on the Ground.”

Tender country pickin’ from Wendell Ferguson (feat. Katherine Wheatley) in “99 Feet of Snow.” Snuggly fun.

Bel Air has some driving difficulties bc of “Too Much Snow.” Gnarly garage crooning.

Snow Way: in

TOO MUCH OF A GOOD THING? You’re welcome, you conspicuous consumers.

As a sequel to Snow Day–this time for newly adults who don’t have that school-age connection–the romance of being stuck together can get all stoked and flaming. Mindy Smith’s folky “Snowed In” is pretty hot. Her smokey vocal is asking for just-us.

Likewise Breathe Carolina wanna spend all night to get it right for their electronic pop “Snowed In.”

In the same vein Chance the Rapper and Jeremih beat out “Snowed In” for Li’l Mama.

Moreover Martin Carlberg feat. Tanja Doko (from the free Epidemic Sound Music Library) delivers the dream of jazz time with you “Snowed In.” Cool cat, cool kitty.

What’s more Over the Rhine lowers the lights for adult jazz with “Snowed in with You.”

Additionally Kyle Kupecky pops the pop with his teenybopperish “Snowed In.” He’s so pretty!

Ditto, John Berry ‘s “Snowed In” country adores you (in a church approved way).

Encore! Dani & Lizzy got cuddling in mind for their “Snowed In.” Jazzier pop this time.

Alternately J. Christopher hollers some ’80s sounding pop about young love, “Snowed In.”

Haven’t i heard this already? “Snowed In” by Twin Kennedy is sultry country neediness.

Not as certainly, Haley Green has alt-regrets she’d like to fix being “Snowed In” with you.

Making the best of the bad news Linda Davis goes classic country with “Snowed In Christmas.” JJ Nolis gives us the guy take on it.

Ultimately Albert Collins lays down some mean electric blues (and found poetry) for his talky “Snowed In.” It’s not a happy day for ol’ Al.

Snow Way: where?

Snow in a far away place may seem like an impossible dream.

‘Course that paradox screams literary device so that Natalie Cole can R+B “Snowfall on the Sahara”  about unlikely love, etc. Cliff Richard shares the boys’ view on this tune.

More mixed metaphors from Elizaveta Khripounova with “Snow in Venice.” Here she adds blues to piano bar to great accomplishment about that special time, remember?

K. Bramley’s “Snow in London,” to put the mitten on the other fist, bemoans you leaving with some lovely unplugged punk.

“Bluegrass, White Snow” descends like a cloud of wishes whether from New Trails, Patty Loveless, or the dozens of homegrown pickers and grinners like The Pluckin’ Nuts.

Some of these place holders i’ve crowed over before. Hardly worth a seconding, but Ariane Grande’s “Snow in California,” Jethro Tull’s “First Snow on Brooklyn,”  Naïka’s “Snowing in LA (long distance)“, Dan Adamini’s “Snow is Falling in Upper Michigan,” Kristin McLean’s “Snow is Falling in Colorado,” Harold Livingstone and Mile Marker 24’s “White Christmas in the Florida Keys,” Timothy Chen Allen’s “Tonight It Snowed in San Juan,” Kristie Stremel’s “Kansas Snow Song“–all vie for background placement over the local news outro Christmas Eve. Sad.

Burl Ives takes on the case of “Snow for Johnny” praying for some luckless Louisiana lad. It’s his inimitable style (although Lauren St. Jane and The Dead Westerns did it too, albeit with ‘billy whining). Whatever will Johnny do without a big snowman, Burl?

Snow Way: that one day

There Ain’t No Snow Like Christmas Snow,” proposes Jeff Michaels. And we all know what he means with his samba jazz pop. Any old snow is so so snow. 12/25 weather is made sacred by association.

Women in Country paint a perfect picture with their “Christmas Snow.” It seems an essential piece of the pop-polluted country music puzzle.

What should have been dreary amateur pop gets an experimental tweaking from Jen Hanson. “Christmas Snow” is middle class scrapbook of memories, but haunts regardless.

Snow Business” is mostly about Christmas, but it mentions snow. Shane O’Brien is backed by St. Michaels College for this old fashioned carol.

It Could Snow Tonight” asks for hope and love with earnest 1970s electric pop from George Dare. It’s always more than just frozen water.

1970s treacle in the form of “Christmas Snow” I guess by Arthur Lowe, about Mr. Snow, one of those  Mr. Men characters from the annoying little books back then. Soaring pop.

Intimate and warm, Kelly Morrison unplugs for her country lullaby “Christmas Snow.”

Jazz counterpoint from Lindsey Webster purring “It’s Gonna Snow on Christmas.” There’s an ellipsis implied there that leads to….

“Christmas Snow” is such a strong symbol, electric blues from Michael Burk compares it to his pure driven love. ‘Sgotta melt her, man.

Snow Way: winter, duh

Some songs simply celebrate the season. Winter, snow, lyrics, done. I suspect druidism.

Now it can be totally Christian. Audrey Assad sings “Winter Snow” for Chris Tomlin, making the storm the metaphor for the First Coming. Deconstruct that, English majors!

Or wait, it can be night (Winter assumed) as with En Vogue’s “Snowy Nights.” R+B bubblicious.

Oh, let’s cut some Celtic cloth! Orla Fallon gets some Old World mystical plucking happening for her “Winter, Fire, and Snow.” Scary out there.

Marching with the white walkers Enya timpanizes “White is the Winter Night.” Pagan.

St. Alban’s Abbey Boys’ Choir lift voices into dog whistle range with “Silent Falls the Winter’s Snow.” Moody still. Holy as well.

Just as medievally, Annie Lennox croons “See Amid the Winter’s Snow.” Uplifting at last. (And so very Christian.)

But it’s snow–back to tragic with Isaac Hayes and “Winter Snow,” a 1969 weepie Motown blues ballad. Damn, got some snow in my eye.

Snow Way: day-oh

Too much H two minus-O? Make it a snow day! Stay home and… write a song about it.

With over 4 million views school teacher May Morris goes big with her ‘Hello’ parody “Snow” calling for just one more snow day. Powerful pipes from shushing the swarm, apparently.

The Sharer Fam (not related, but they all love to share) rollick family friendly with “Snow Day,” highlighting all the boring stuff.

The Fresh Beat Band thinks rap and Caribbean go together in their dull/hyper “Snow Day.”

Scaring the kids with their talent The Ohio City Singers scream out “Snow Day.” Sing along, i mean right now!

Eric Herman turns clever hip hop rhyming into ADHD kidsong with “Snow Day,” in which a valuable tragic lesson is learned about fun in the frost. Learn fear, Fred.

Pamela Noon orchestrates her kids to go big with her show stopping “Snow Day.” Hold that note!

Trout Fishing in America lays down jazz tracks for the littluns with their “Snow Day.” Friendly enough to dance to.

Plank Road rocks out with their sfx-laden “Snow Day.” Teresa Jennings may know Phil.

Toby Lightman hopes his penchant for percussion makes you dance in his “Snow Day.” Pop!

Matt Pond PA leans more lite-alt with his “Snow Day.” Emo music, emo money.

Bah & the Humbugs growl out garage rock for their “Snow Day.” Revolting.

Hey, look–it’s Lisa Loeb singing about grown up problems with her “Snow Day.” don’t do it alone.

Sounding like a mom in a cartoon musical, Noel Pagan (!?) belts out “Snow Day.” Can’t tell if she likes it or not, but she’s pretty clingy.

Even more torchy, Emily Mac is propositioning you with minimal jazz and maximal innuendo with her “Snow Day.” Mmmm-mama!

The Holderness Family knows what they’re doing, so count on their “Snow Day” to tickle and tug for their family hiking you wish you could’ve had with yours.

The whole childhood reminiscence rolls out in touchingly in “Snow Day” from folkie Michael Lelly Blanchard.

Snow Way: fun fight

For some, fun equals violence. Weapons made of wintery wonder!

Let’s start out slowly: “The First Snowball of the Season” is a baseball themed puffery by The Golden Orchestra & Singers. Strike One!

Off topically, Devo has a philosophically angst number “Snowball.” Electronica whene’er we can.

The tots’ ode to “Snowball Fight” has lyrics by Alan Katz to the so-called tune of ‘Jingle Bells.’ Should we teach this?

Gateway Christian Academy has their Snow Day announcement as a parody of Rachel Platten’s ‘Fight Song’ aka “Snowball Fight Song.” Hilarious revenge tactics for a church-sponsored children’s notice.

Jimmy Fallon shrugs on his punk coat for “Snow Fight.” S’no fun, really.

Bunch of Believers take the ska road for “Snowball Fight.” Just as danceable, but more poetic.

North Pole Patrol sasses up the sexy with a (small) big band torch number “Snowball Fight.”

BLUE ALERT (no, really) from Weekend Nachos and their blink-and-you’ll-miss-it “Snowball Fight.” Metal.

The Happy Racers big band their pop for “Snowball Fight.” It’s bouncy, rockin’ fun about putting out your eye. Duck!