Christmas Countdown: 1 and (not) done

Big band Harry Connick, Jr. swings “I’m Gonna be the First One.” That’s up on Christmas morning.

McCardy’s “One Christmas Eve” is also carefully orchestrate. Flirty, in a pop way.

Courtney Swain’s piano alt-pop “Snow Globe” has an agenda. Remember that one Christmas stocking that made Christmas suck? BLUE ALERT.

Folk bluegrass for Rick’s Original Music “It All Started One Christmas.” It’s a light fight with the neighbors! But the wives’ve got something to say about the livestock additions.

That One Christmas Song” by Caroline Manning X Hannah Meloche is pop trouble. A hit song that makes regret happen. Fame haters!

The Black Arts boogie woogie “Christmas Number One.” But that top rated song becomes a monster and eats the army. Uh oh.

Christmas Countdown: 2 measurements

Melissa Sanley has found a “Christmas Recipe,” but–as you might expect from cheesy pop music–it’s a Kindergarten teacher’s list: 2 Cups of Joy; A pinch of Cinnamon; A lot of Smiles… and more. Hoo boy.

Ivor Biggun plays a disgruntled mall Santa who must withstand a gallon or two of bodily fluids evacuated onto their laps. No wonder “Christmas Makes Me Spew.” Music hall shenanigans.

White teen rapper Dripz gets his scoff on with “Christmas is Overrated.” Queueing up in 2°c is just the beginning of his complaint list.

Hey there, weather lady, begins ZuCo in the jazzy R+B plea “Save a Little Snow for Christmas.” An inch or two Thanksgiving Day isn’t enough. White Christmas, got it?

Transitioning off the interstate onto the two-lane road is how you know you’re into a “Hometown Christmas.” That and Allie Aro’s nasal country octave rolling.

Interesting rap from DJ Zenas celebrates all the quirks of Christmas: Cousin ain’t actin a foo’ yet On the floor doin my two step. “For the Holidayz” offers R+B glee, see?

More out of the house, travel guide Nick Lawrence takes us to a “Merry Christmas from San Antone.” Mashed country (blues, boogie woogie, mariachi) offers to go riverwalking… Or two step out to the hill country. Whatever gets you there, dawg.

R+B pop from Sydeajah offers “Dance with Me (This Christmas).” Not much of a dance rhythm, but she’ll work it out: We can two step from west to east, Just Dance with me.

One for the money, two for the show, run run Rudolph don’t be slow, goes the boogie woogie of Lenne Brothers Band in the oh baby “Teddy Boy Season’s Greetings.” Boot scootin’ fun.

Christmas Countdown: 3 wishes/cheers/gifts/beers/ghosts

Three wishes are big about this time of the year. Tony Yazbeck and Patti Lupone duet “Three Wishes for Christmas” from the B’way musical ‘Gypsy.’ It’s for love, but Broadway show love.

Unable to afford a menorah, Dolly Parton offers “Three Candles” to make three wishes for Christmas [‘Cuz wishes do come true]. It’s Dolly.

Anne Murray wishes for “Christmas Wishes.” Then she country/pop demurs: I’d only ask for three. But they are the universe changing kind.

Twin League may be a bit over enthusiastic wishing Ho! Ho! Ho! Three cheers for Santa! with shouting and pop singing in the slightly catchy “Santa’s Sleigh.”

Ups and downs in Matthew McLaughlin’s “Chestnuts.” Christmas is a rollercoaster; Three cheers for the up and over… but that depends if you’re with him, Darlene. Otherwise, it’s alt rock all the way.

Stellar Kart gets less punk and more traditional with “Punk the Halls.” Three cheers for Christmas: Hey, hey, hey and a ho, ho, ho they sing, rather than wail.

Cheers? Beers! King Kendall seeks the perfect “Christmas Jam,” but seems to rap about whatever’s in front of him: Lookin outside tryina′ see reign deer; While Ty knockin’ back 3 beers (he drunk) And Mari sheds a tear (yup). Day inna random life.

I’ll Never Drink with Santa Again” is Fabby Claus doing his drunk Elvis AND his drunk rockabilly smush mouth. It starts with One and one and one is three. Then it keeps going. Good stuff.

Backroom Stereo preferred the isolation of the Pandemic. In “I Hate the Snow” he rocks any excuse he can not to go out. Like snow! But I’ll walk to the pub, sit by the fire and have a beer or two, or maybe even three. Then snow’s not so bad.

With a better excuse, Secret Army punks out the pain when “Fired in Christmas.” Running into his mates, however, I order a beer, then two, then three and I start to feel alright. He even has a good night. But, the next morning….

Beers? Gifts! Boy bands are adorable when their lyrics make them out spoiled babies. Varsity Fanclub’s “It’s Christmas Again” chortles: Presents underneath the tree. One for you and three for me. The poppest of pop.

And… when Santa arrives… Our man of mystery bears a gift or three, according to the American rock of Jody Whitesides in “We’d Like to Wish You.” Yeah!

Solomon Burke know you want “Presents for Christmas.” In the best of R+B, he allows that all of you want Maybe one, two, or three toys. He’s on to something.

Maurice Fresh (feat. Shane Cashmere) raps about keeping the Christmas spirit with I told Santa I want 3 cars. “Big Sale” is rattatat rapping about making big.

A little Jerry Lee Lewis styling (welcome!) from Larson Lee details all the Christmas movie cliches that WON’T keep him from getting to his loved one, including Not even three ghosts Who showed Scrooge his grave Could scare me off this Christmas Day. “It’s No Christmas“without you!

Christmas Countdown: 1959

The Continental Drifters ballad hard on Mama and Daddy whose farm failed and ran them into the ground. But the good times are encapsulated when his brother saw his first TV, It was the Christmas of 1959 and they families up for a few. “Daddy Just Wants It to Rain” is the American horror story of working hard, not mattering, and being forgotten. This American rock should help fix some of that. But, gee….

Mom and Dad in an unnamed singer’s “Christmas in Three-Quarter Time” are doing better. With all their snuggliness and kisses and icy-slow country music, they enjoy still driving the car made in ’59.

Kent Goodson & Michael Panasuk also recall a good time around “Christmas 1959.” boogie woogie (but slow, for the old folks). Brenda Lee, the King, Jerry Lee, they were all there!

Singing Bells

Sometimes the tintinnabula are just instruments to make music at Yuletide. Just play along.

Kidsong leans on this idea so those tensed up kids can let loose with some percussion. See: “Ring Little Bells” as performed by the Christian Sesame Street Veggie Tales. Wee, wot fun.

Infectiously round the Christmas Songs and Carols channel on Youtube has put “Ring, Ring, Ring the Bells” to the tune of ‘row your boat.’ Your kids don’t stand a chance.

Greg Page has the kids cheer for the “Christmas Bells.” In his kidsong the you sing la la lala la with the bells. Okay.

Etta James conducts your kids with “Ring the Bells.” Altogether now.

Dingle dangle dingle ding is just some of the message brought to you by Peggy Lee in “Ring Those Christmas Bells.” It’s not singing so much as onamotopeoia-ing.

The Bandana Splits boogie some boogie with “All the Bells” Sweet Christmas song.

Baby It’s Coal: oh I see!

Coal in your Christmas stocking might be a reminder to straighten up and fly right for next time.

Look to the cartoons to teach ya. My Little Pony‘s Pop Fly laments show tune style with “Last Year I Got Coal for Christmas.” On the path to improvement, but that attitude needs adjusting still.

Private Eye Music go boogie woogie with their loaded lesson “Lump of Coal.” Kid took his lumps and came back reflectively. Or at least looking at how his behavior differed from the other children. Well, the song sure is fun.

ReduXmas: Pick a Card

Songs about Christmas are so endemic that the merest ephemera or frippery is grist for the Xmas music mill. Hence, dozens of songs about Christmas cards. You’d think, with the electronic age, we’d’ve run out of these selections. Think this:

I’m Gonna Sit Right Down and Write Myself a Christmas Card” is a parody of the old 1930s bluesy band number, here done up jug band style by Dan Hicks and the Christmas Jug Band. Hi de ho.

Shot o’ Soul reassures us that “You Won’t Get No Christmas Card from Me.” He’s so over us with his boogie woogie funk.

Don We Now: whadja not wanna get?

Did you really ASK for something to wear?: ‘Course you didn’t! That’s lame-o!

Grandma’s Christmas Shirt” tells us the story of that gift you have to wear but you’d rather burn. The Good Year Pimps go appropriately punk for this honest discourtesy.

Drunk parody fun time! “What Tie is This?” takes a turn at ‘Child’ with the wit of Robert Lund of FuMP. You’ll larf, if you’ve lived this.

‘Course there’s the sizing problem. Mel Blanc gives us classic nationalism with “The Hat I Got for Christmas is Too Beeg.” Reeng dee bell and beet duh drom.

Then there’s socks. Something Awful Christmas Songs tells the whole sordid BLUE ALERT tale in “King Lou’s Terrible Christmas Song.” You might need a drink.

Andy Pagana gives you the actual list of what he does want. But most especially, he country kidsongs, “I Don’t Want Clothes for Christmas.” You’ve been warned.

The worst gift JD McPherson ever got? “Socks.” A jazz romp of considerable elasticity.

Boogie rock with Trout Fishing in America: “Santa Brought Me Clothes.” You need to reinventory your misdeeds for the year, dudes. Santa’s telling you something.