Category: new age

I Want to BELIEVE:XXII

Kenny Loggins’s “December” is virtuosoistic piano playing into NewAge sentiment. Pretty, but it’s only vaguely connected to mythologies.

Hoping to Elvis the sentiment, Manos the Wild sneers through the reverential retro-pop”I Believe in Christmas.” He’s fighting the non-believers, and i believe, he knows karate.

Romany pop from Endiamonds brings “Make Believe” into focus. They’ll explain what you’ll need.

Bringing back that banging folk of a thousand years yon “I Believe in Christmas” by LUX the band highlights the upper reaches of faith.

The LoveMonkeys with JD Rankin believe in so many things with the holiday season spurring them to pop music (and a Carrib accent?) in “I Believe in Christmas.” Danceable.

“I Still Believe In Christmas” by Freddie Guarella is more than decent folk indie that actually believes in YOU. Uplifting.

Corvair tries for NewAge with echoic filter and tubular bells in the moody “I Believe in Christmas.” It IS hypnotic.

Oneirology.22

Harsh party music from The Castle Arms offers “My Christmas Dream” by opening and closing eyes. Hard to unwrap the presents that way, but the tubular bells rock.

Barbershop quartet with Nordstrom lobby piano offers up a “Dream Christmas.” Henry Golis with The Jordanaires are singing about YOU, love.

The Christmas Cards hit the indie alts with depressing musicality in “Snow Dream.” It’s NOT about drugs at all. It’s hope. And it’s comfortable.

There will be another chance to pout, New Ages Elina Laivera in the opaque “Once Upon a Christmas Dream.” While quite dreamlike, the mash up of accepting Christ and We don’t need no church scratches like random stream of consciousness.

X Files-mas: Goblins

Perhaps a French version of the German kobold, perhaps a demonic mischief maker from a specific region, goblins may even be a nickname for orcs in Middle Earth. They get short shrift and are hard to take seriously as a category of evil. Wait’ll you get a load of these.

Nekrogoblikon’s album Goblin Island elevates the monsters into alien invaders here to kill all of us or at least set fire to our children. In their metal “Goblin Christmas Armageddon Part I” they unspeakably imitate Santa and crew to spread misery. [“Part II” is the species-cide aftermath where the goblins celebrate with a goblin clown. No kidding.]

Brokeback Jockstrap characterize “The Christmas Goblin” as a Santa-killing, reindeer-eating monster who mostly wants to go to the bathroom in your house. Metal rock funny.

“The Christmas Goblins” according to Elina Laivera are protecting the Tree of Life from humans. So long as we burn the Yule log, they won’t come down our chimneys. So get them trees, kids. New Age confusion.

On Track to Xmas: Stand Clear of the Closing Doors!

Subways are trains too, eh? When i look at subway my mouth is watery; I’m always waiting for christmas to hurry: quoth Young Shaun in the childlike rap “Dear Santa.” Despite squeezing a ‘Polar Express’ allusion in there, he runs dry pretty quickly.

Comedy excerpt: “Urkel on the G-Train” (skit) from Retrospec is not a song so much as it is an annoyance. ‘Member Urkel?Now REALLY imagine him on the subway!

The O. Henry tale (retold by Joni Mitchell) “Gift of the Magi” is barely a Christmas idea, but it is set in the big bad city and–in this version–a character catches a train in order to be foolish. Light urban tragedy made folk.

Jenheiser jazzes up the transit with “Before Midnight.” Christmas can just wait for the train. ‘Kay?

Trains can start in the city, then travel cross-country, then back to cities. I don’t schedule ’em but–ya? Enya verisimilitudes the journey with “Trains and Winter Rains.” Lotta sadness. But it’ll get you there.

Breaking the Ice.26

Jenny Alien slips in some BLUE ALERT with her clubby EDM “Skating Rink.” She’s failing at clubbing, but lives next to that icy palace. Something’s not working. Except the hot mess of a song, that slaps.

Sport Game gets more gnarly garage with “Figure Skating.” Seems reflective. Can’t really tell.

Wovoka Jr. tries some “Star Skating” but loses me somewhere around Saturn. New age-y alt explorations of hypnotic strength.

Baby It’s Coal: the opera

A ’90s gang of Philly musicians joined warped minds to skewer Christmas music. They took a while to rise above door-to-door cassette sales, but i highly recommend you lay your hands on whatever Hot Buttered Elves released, regardless of roster.

“Coal” is their 11 minute opus (apparently in several parts) about the ins and outs of striking black rock for the holidays. At times instrumental (haunted symphonic) at others experimental club (haunting beat poetry). Grab a cup o’ joe and settle back for this one. It’ll take you places you never dreamt. See you on the other side.

WHAT ELSE? Yule B Light(dark)

Well, it is dark around this time of the year. Perhaps prayer will turn that cycle around and ritual will return the sun’s mighty light.

Appropriation is the sincerest form of plagiarism: Karina Skye sings “Silent Night, Solstice Night” with great galloping gospel gasping. Fit for a piano bar.

t heilsen bring the celebration to a screeching downer with the death dirge “Solstice Carol.” It takes folk to remind you how much life sucks.

Caving to the War on Christmas, Rich Mertes has the elementary school kids sing his “Winter Solstice Song.” It’s like science set to a medieval mass.

Homegrown offerings from F13at Cat: a lite hymn of tinkling choir for one comes in this “Winter Solstice Carol.” All hail the clock.

‘We’ll make our own light’ carols Ann Fearon (tracking upon track) with the tremulous glee tune “Song for the Winter Solstice.” I see you between the lines!

‘Come rising sun!’ invokes Kiva with didgeridoo and pan flute in “Winter Solstice Sunrise.” Hit that groundhog snooze alarm!

Calling out the sun may result in cheeriness. Jennifer Cutting’s “Song of Solstice” is an accordion sea chanty of light steps. Friends all!

One other subject about Solstice Yule is that tricky fire without which you would surely perish. Rich DeVore has a dreamy folk trip about you, baby, and that time of year–“Solstice Carol.” Just close your eyes.

Groovy gospel spiritual from Charlie Murphy and Jami Sieber conjurs the end of dark and brings the Sun to her feet with “Light is Returning.” Amen! (Kalimba solo!)

Lisa Thiel’s “Winter Solstice Song” is the USArmy anthem ‘be all you can be,’ by way of the supreme power, the light. Fem drum circle new age chanting.

WHAT ELSE? Yule B Mother

There’s something about Midwinter that leads to cavorting. Is it the home stretch to planting and food? Is it the astronomical alignment of Earth’s pole tipped furthest? Is it just another excuse to waggle the bum?

Not having received The Word, pagans did fine at concocting their own festivals and fun. Alban Arthan, Dongzhi, Korochun, Shalako, Ziemassvētki, and more conjured up cuddly traditions and endearing salutations for the ages. Disappointingly i’m gonna use my English lit major to stay Western Civ and not stray too far from the Europeans. But they did Paganism pretty well, you betcha.

One difference between Yule observance and Xmas is Mōdraniht, the honoring of da mama, without whose blessings (bearing our borning), we wouldn’t be here.

Pissed off Russian metal from Gartraada, “A Night of Winter Solstice” salutes the Queen of Seasons. I presume as a fellow killer.

The Goddess of Pleasure and Delight is the old timey subject of James Mosher’s “Winter Solstice Song.” I’ll drink to that.

Sacred Mother gets a more middle of the road Celtic tribute from Jan Garrett and JD Martin with the dulling “Winter Solstice Lullaby.” Yawn.

Yala Lati, a women’s global music choir, rounds up the “Winter Solstice Round” with much gravity for the grandmother.

More tribally, Leah Salomaa chants up the womb metaphor in “Solstice Song.” Primal stuff.

Wyrd Sisters blend their voices speaking tune to power with “Solstice Carole.” Lullaby and happy new year. Pretty stuff.

HATE Xmas.04

Many are the causes of stress from mid-December on, but woe be unto those who simply hate the festoonery of Christmas for hate’s sake. (Millennials!)

NewJerseyite punkfolk band Where’s My Spaceship leans in on the bogus family time with “Everybody Hates Christmas.” But BLUE ALERT the real message is how horrible the inconvenience of special time cuts into not doing anything in particular.

A bit too blasé to hate, Zoe Sky Jordan phones in “I Hate Christmas” with a melodic folk pop list of peevish complaints: headache, interested friends, lack of life’s goals. Hoo boy.

Groovy piano lounge from Billy West as Ren & Stimpy tricks out “I Hate Christmas.” Kids, friends, family, singing, treats–gag me with a cliche! Have mare-cee!

Johnny Setlist noodles around the piano to stream out his consciousness about how big a let down he has it “Befallen This Christmas.” Yeah, maybe for everyone else. For me–is that all there is?

Anthropomorphic Snow Sculpture: kids 4

One sidenote to the whole kids’ snowmen is the big deal 1978 book The Snowman by Raymond Briggs made into a British big deal animated special in 1982 and which plays around Christmastime across the pond every year.

The ethereal ultrasonic soprano song “We’re Walking in the Air” became a 1985 hit for Aled Jones who did not sing it in the cartoon, but released it as a single when a teen. Thirty years later he released it a duet with himself. Freaky.

Andy Burrows dropped a prog rock song “Light the Night” in the 2012 TV sequel ‘The Snowman and the Snowdog.’

The original ‘Walking’ has been coopted by the crystal-gazers as an out-of-body/Wiccan trip. Finnish group Nightwish does an over-orchestrated dance version i could get naked and flail around to. Prog-celtic. (This is lite-metal. Fuller metal like from Woods of Infinity harshes the vibe. Ick.)