Christmas… Screw It

Apparently spoofing their own hit, Jones Earthquake Band punk rocks out “Another Boring Christmas“. With a smattering of BLUE ALERT they say what they mean.

If I could have a friend like you in my life/Then I guess I’d be doing just fine may sound just a bit standoffishness, but with the young it’s cool. “Everything’s Gonna be Cool This Christmas” is an Eels bid to chill with some indie rock. Gaspard Royant jazzes it his cover with an almost boogie-woogie affability.

Perhaps rising above uncaring “Hopeful for the Holidays (Remastered)” by Full Service rocks the folk with meandering monotone. But the refrain goes: The best part of life is… nothing. Uh, what-?

Obsessing over the seasonal sadness, Automatic Timers croon indie onto those “Midwinter Cracks“. Hope springs in three months or so.

Tinkling the ivories Ian Coss goes minimalist with the holidays in his half jazz- half whatever “The Realist“. Not the person to invite to your mixer.

Classic Pat rocks out on Xmas possibilities–like that don’t wanna fight song from The Ramones, “On Second Thought” he does wanna fight tonight. So much for goodwill to all.

Christmas… I Don’t Care

Family Friend identifies the problem with “Boring Christmas (Blaze Away)” fingering the Apollo Xmas mission as the tedium on the Te Deum (even though they hadn’t been born yet). Way to complain.

“All I Can Manage For Christmas” by Tommy and Trace Bateman encapsulates the true Millennial question: Why? All they can manage is this folky indie.

I Don’t Know, from Atco MC (feat. Angelina Randazzo & Julie Andaloro) seems to answer that question. It’s in the refrain of “Savior“, electronic pop that’s not sure it needs to get out of bed.

“No Snow In Outter Space” by Silver Louzy And Friends ! (ft. Petit Pied) makes it BORING! A frolic of pop garage complaint.

Hench wants to “Hide from the Holidays” (with you). Again we ditch the celebrations to get consensual. Why not both? Intimate lounge.

Christmas? Unimpressed

Jim Bob thrashes rock intentionally when he faces his own mortality in “The Ghost of Christmas Boring“. And then he woke up. Or did he? (Spooky!)

In the rearview, Ben Coleman (welcome back!) has “Boxing Day Blues“. Not connected to the loss of the holy day, but instead a glum epiphany of how pointless it all was. Bit more jazz than blues.

In “Holidays to See” Cassie McMullin fusses over YOU, but dismisses this holiday as a poor excuse to show her affection. A rhythm machine, a girl, and a message. What more does homegrown pop need?

Ben Folds is “Sleepwalking Through Christmas” without you around. Big band indie with toilet paper stuck to its shoe. Why, oh why?

“Christmas Without Them (Unmixed, Unmastered & Unloved)” has Confused celebrating love and joy at home, while HE is somewhere else keeping the world safe. The dueling genres of indie and pop seem to whisper Why bother?

Bobby Goldsboro has something he needs to get off his chest: You’re doing it wrong. “Look Around You (It’s Christmas Time)” he pleads to the miserly and the miserable both with his trademark country middle of the road rock. Love it.

BFD Christmas

Jessica Lynne Witty mopes about everyone else partying merry-like, but for her “It Don’t Feel Like Christmas” when you’re not there. Country swing with a shot of the blahs.

For Music for the Soul “It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas This Year” for similar reasons. This jazzy blues has more of a self-harm feel to it.

Also missing you Brian C Dexter (feat. Stephanie Day) warbles out the indie “It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas” but mostly bc it’s like Californy (no snow!).

“It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas” is Timmy Sean’s uptempo downbeat surfer take on she’s-not-that-into-you. There’s plenty more blinkers on the tree, buddy.

Eddie Parsons whines how “It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas” without you. Again. This time, folk. Had enough?

“It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas” by Ben Coleman is a more depressive indie from someone who just doesn’t fit in. ‘Tis the suicide season! (Yeah, i blame TV as well.)

Christmas–Couldn’t Care Less

When the Girlfriend Material states Is that all there is? you know Xmas doesn’t matter. Hard club rock for “Winter and Construction“. Fun bummer.

The Hot Buttered Elves know a thing or two about malaise, so witness the list making of “A Winter Perfect Moon“. Instead of biblical plagues, he asks for the Rapture instead. Could be better, is all he’s indie singing.

Pickin’ and grinnin’, Michael Gurley strums out “How the Holidays Have Got Me Down” wearing his harried economics like a torn and dirty Santa beard.

Window Business’s “Brandy and Eggnog” is a tribute to the death of James Brown and the dark moods that follow for the season in New Mexico. Sorrowful corrido.

Tyrone and Lesley uke it out with their despondency in “It’s Christmas This Christmas“. The just don’t care, despite the sprightly chords.

Christmas… So What?

“It’s Christmas And You’re Boring Me” warbles out Slow Club with petulant indie monotone. Appropriate.

Unintelligibly, Dirt Vultures set the garage to eleven for “Christmas Could Be A Bummer“. Solutions? Anyone?

Not much positivity when Christmas is “Just Fine“. Ciao overlays Xmas music on top of vibrating pop to get their lack of point across.

Christmas Day is boring as well, maintains D’Modes in the iconic “Christmas is Crap“. Chanting rock. Why can’t every song be like this?

Beatnik Turtle sum up the indifference with the boss bluegrass of “Goin’ Through the Motions This Christmas“. Jittery insouciance.

Christmas Whatever

“Silent Night, Boring Night” is an expected choral parody by Roxie Maisel. Okay, the growing Jewish resentment was entertaining.

Nothing else matters, sing By Surprise in “No Mistletoe” about Xmas. But they just don’t care. And they sing that too. Existentializing indie with amp overloads.

Ben Smith ‘s “Last Needle” begins as an ode to a dying Xmas tree, but actually celebrates his breakup with you. He’s fine with it, as so much of those holiday chores were onerous. Echoic retro pop.

It’s a King Thing approaches holiday love like, oh i dunno, something or other. “Embrimas” is romance without affect, holiday without a care, music without motion.

Not wanting to go out but only stay in, Stayers report on “Chicken Ridiculous” with an indolence grown of having been there donned that. Slow roll club indie.

Young Statues does go out, but then loses interest singing “I Don’t Wanna Know What’s Under Your Tree“. Kids seem to blame somehow in this indie pop bandsplosion.

Christmas… Never Mind

Grade School pop out “This Christmas Is Boring I Wish It Were Spring Instead” like a Northerner who can’t stand even one more inch of snow. Some nice electric guitar whining.

Licensed shrink Dr. BLT insists that you “Take Christmas With You When You Go“. Cheerless, because heartbroken. Some hurt can’t be tinseled.

New Lovers snarl and slur “Like It’s Christmas” like it’s a chore. Cha cha indie. (Those Irish lads, they don’t seem to mind….)

The Classic Brown faces chucking it all in “Playing Christmas (relit)“, an indie with an hollow aftertaste.

Jiggly Caliente steps outs of the drag gaiety to list down the problems with a “Ratchet Christmas“. Gettin’ twisted never looked so ghetto.

No one would welcome a “Hard-Hearted Christmas (Polar Powerhouse)“, but Ages indie pops the sympathy you might need for suffering its vicissitudes. Then the brass carries me away–!!

Christmas–What’s the Big Deal?

Rocking hard, Girls Aloud harp on about “Christmas ‘Round At Ours“. They’re too old for kid stuff and too young to beam at the kids. It’s boring for young adults, innit? (‘Til the mistletoe….)

In “What’s a Cyberpunk World Without Its Weeds?” Les Issambres jazz indies the malaise of the modern Christmas-devotee. It’s not mood, it’s me.

Is Xmas something special? “Christmas Is What It Is” allows John Vosel & the Party Crashers with pop country carelessness. Christmas will still be the one, but meh.

With seductive latin rhythms Hey Ocean declares “Tonight It’s Christmas Time” and he’s all about alone times with she and he. Then she retorts with the intolerable boredom and wanting to just Do Something. I give it three months.

Glamourpuss smacks around the retro folk-pop of the late ’60s for s lovely “It’s Only Christmas“. It’s giving thanks but in such a lackadaisical way, i question it. While bebopping out.

Christmas, Gimme a Break

Suffering from a recent breakup, Puuding finds “Christmas Without You” boring. R+B bordering on easy listening.

Asking for a break is the BLUE ALERT rap “Oh Comble All Ye Faithful” by F.Lobot. It’s not that they hate all your reason for the season, they just can’t be bothered.

The Christmas Jug Band don’t have much use for Yule, instead they proclaim “I Wanna Make a Holiday” that suits them better. I Can Do Better is the insincerest form of criticism. Bluesy zydeco.

Roy Zimmerman gets Dylanesque with “Christmas is Pain“, a folk diatribe whizzing all over the holidays from the 99%. Eat the rich desserts.

More folk, with driving pop, protests “The Hypocritical Christmas“. Matt Roach has an agenda to grind concerning all your unquestioning devotional frippery. He doesn’t give a shingle from under Santa’s feet.

The Mangles rockabilly “Gimme Gimme Gimme (A Break For Christmas)” with the provisio that they don’t wanna start a fight. But the Griswoldian effects of holiday working, shopping, and Santas weary their rocking ways.