DONNA‘s in charge. The Domina of Ancient Rome; the Donna of Modern Rome; the Dona of Barcelona.
[A few songsmiths mispronounce Donner the reindeer. They get no space here.]
“The Twelve Days of Donna” by MK and the Sloppy Sons seems musical. But it’s still the same old same old. Their sass might be explain in “Does Donna Hear What I Hear?” Seems she might be a music instructor from their past. Sick burn from years later!
The “Unaccompanied Gardener” stuck in an airport around the holidays is named Donna, but prefers Courtney, or so Love Note to Dexter sings in indie mismatched harmony. (What’s Lewis Black doing there?!)
DONALD is a mighty ruler in Scots Gaelic. Try not to read too much into it.
For example, Artofdefiance uses pop AI to spell out “Blowing Bubba on a Christmas Night“. Doesn’t mean head of the country or nothing with its Donald this and Bubba that. Just a kooky song.
“Donny X-mas” is stuttering funk rap from Sensitive Men. It’s from Canada. Could be any Donny.
Who’s that guy in Joni Mitchell’s “Face Lift“? Experimental folk getting into trouble bc of some Donald down her street.
In Toni Nebraska’s “Ghost of Christmas Whiskey” Donald’s passed out on gin in the alley. Not sure who that means. AI gospel country with a penchant for beat poetry.
I don’t need much excuse to repeat NightHeart’s “Donny the Reindeer“. This retro rock pop plays on loop in the soundtrack of my life.
Let’s try a new one: “Dashing Donny” is R+B overdone by The Claus Academy of Flight. More reindeer stuff.
Dolly’s the shortened form. “Holly Dolly Christmas” by Danika Portz is lounge jazz with a wink and a smile.
Perhaps reaching for superlatives, Dolly Style hits pop on the cheese with “Have a Dolly Xmas“. Not sure there’s a real Dolly here.
Faith Elliott has a bittersweet portrait in some Scottish indie Christmas collection. “Dolores” is about a newborn, a lost mom, and the frowning cold. Merry Holidays!
DIXIE surely means The Deep South, nah? Actually, it’s French for tenth. That’s a big French family, that is.
Brian D Swan asks the AI to hold no boundaries for its big swinging country anthem “Christmas at the Label“. The recording company office holiday party apparently is reckless and rowdy; Dixie is spiking the punchbowl for example.
The Sunnyside Social Club scats out “Dinah” amidst crazy Dixieland. I’m sensing a good time had by all.
“Dear Santa” from Bria Meledē & Rockim Williamson is a he loved she loved meet cute rap about each other. No actual names are revealed, though he does refer to her a Dirty Diana (slang for band slut). Awww.
We’re avoiding celebrity shout outs for this theme, but who can resist Paloma Faith & Josh Weller one-upping and two-downing one another with the showtune “Its Christmas And I Hate You“. Near the end the song comes to a complete stop when one challenges the other’s musical taste: Diana Krall is NOT music. Ding ding ding.
Brad Paisley cashes in on the trailer trash of ‘Merry Christmas from the Family’ with his party country “Lit“. Diana undercooks the turkey. (Aunt Linda and Uncle Jay gots their own problems.) Yeah, kind of a blast.
A clump of sounds that Latin claims to mean singer, Old French to mean divine, and Gaelic li’l stag. DEVIN is a mixed bag.
Earbleach decides that growling and modulating makes “Merry Christmas, Devin” a musical number. I can get behind that.
Aradia Faire gets queer sloppy hollering “Devon Got Ran Over By My Mother” to–y’know–that tune. It’s more flailing than mean. But you’ll feel it upside your head. And… BLUE ALERT
You may not know a DENISE who’s a Dionysian, but there’s a leaning, amiright?
Well, there’s the male form as well. The Sazerac Swingers mention a few family members while determining Uncle Dennis–I mean–“Santa Claus Is Late“. Swirly lounge nonsense.
girlhouse makes an indie anthem out of “ugly xmas sweater party“, that event where we had a big fight despite the clues from Halloween months before where I had been Dennis the Menace, and you had been a little too good at being Ted Bundy. Help.
Brain Pudding mocks power pop with the odd story of little Denny, he of the perfect privileged life, who only wants the “Little Blue Drum Set” for Xmas. I did not see this one coming.
Okay, just a couple “Christmas at Dennys” for the sake of it. Randy Stonehill takes his country eulogy serious as hell. Art Pickens goes AI for more down home country misery. Indie rap from Steve unravels suburban tragedy. Jeff and Deb Conrad wink askew with bluegrass cynicism, comparing their venue to the manger. Brothers Who Spoon apply spoofery to Wham! to minimal effect. Shack 25 parody Once in Royal David’s to better effect. Wit! Bandrew devise a tiny operetta for absurd fun. Travis Kreeps la la las just kidding country in his take. So nasal! So funny.
In Caitlin Dykes’s “preachers kid” a life confessed to wasn’t so bad. Detractors expect her to have PTSD from that upbringing, but apart from a choir teacher named Denise who wouldn’t give her the lead in the Christmas Play, it was pretty okay. Indie folk rap.
In the skit “Denise, You Really Like Christmas Carols” Hunks introduces a partygoer who inserts the image of detached toes into all the lyrics. It goes on a bit too long.
Malvin Studios, which seems Scandinavian, let loose with an urophilic outrage–though they do apologize in the song “Sorry Denise“. This Xmas mayhem borders on falsetto disco, so i can’t decide between love and hate.
Not Adelle, not Ella, DELLA still means noble. Just not Adelle noble.
The big deal here is the 1905 O Henry short story ‘The Gift of the Magi‘, here retold by Kristen Chenowith with The Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square backing her. (The original is better, sorry.) Della and Jim poor, wretched loved ones give up everything so that nothing matters on Xmas. The irony of it all!
Several songs celebrate the mini-tragedy of it all, no names named. One even gets her name wrong. Crossfox’s “Bella and Jim” alt-rocks grunge while seeming to prefer Twilight.
(Let’s acknowledge the Conte/Giardini operetta and move on. No one wants to hear that. Nor the other ‘musicals’ for regional consumption.)
Cris Williamson uses alt-folk to talk-sing the story. Her “Gift of the Magi” swings as spiritual, but drops nuance.
Lumibeatz · Umesh Shukla use rap (and AI) to retell their own “The Gift of the Magi“. It had to happen.
Darryl Purpose sneaks funk into the folk with his “The Gift of the Magi“. Ready for the quiz yet?
“The Gift Of The Magi Holiday Fair” From the Antlers Basement includes the plot highlights without as much editorializing. Then it veers sentimentally into a flea market for extra impact. Folk plus a dash of klezmer.
Joe Newberry (feat. April Vetch)’s “Della and Jim” borrow lines from the story to construct their own blue grass quiet weeper.
DEE is a nickname for anyone whose name begins with the letter D. Or it’s Welsh for dark. Or divine. I guess it’s whatever you want it to be.
Tim and Eric from Adult Swim have a Chrimbo tribute, “A Song for Dee Vee“. It could be a name short for DVD. Truly terrible.
Doug and the Angry Elves use AI and country swing to infuse “Grandma’s Christmas Brownies” with special magic. Uncle Kent and Aunt Dee have their minds melted.
Boo Ray wants you to send his “Christmas Card” directly to Dee’s Country Cocktail. That’s where his country singing finds the true meaning of cocktails.
DEBORAH is a busy bee, the only female judge of ancient Israel (as it says in the Bible).
Harry Houlton is pretty fed up with the whole Xmas thing. He’s “Getting Lost For Christmas“, unless you can cure him of being a Debbie Downer. BLUE ALERT (and plenty of self harm to go around). But amusing folk pop for all that.
Need further explanation? Suggi sings “Debbie Downer on Christmas” with frolicsome R+B. Not so depressing here.
Slightly more positively, The Jeffrey Lee Pierce Sessions Project feat. The Amber Lights loves “Debbie by the Christmas Tree“. As it’s a punk admission, it’s not easy to feel the passion.
Deborah writes to Dat Boi and wishes him a “Memey Christmas” in Elliot Gough’s electro-pop dance number. Despite the up-to-the-minute title ref, this is a flash from the ’90s.
Worse off, “Debbie’s Last Christmas” by Nancy LaPlante portrays a ’60s light pop farewell to holly jolly. Holy hell, what is this?
