Young Kernel request you “(Shake)” like a cymbal for Christmas time. Repetitive, hypnotic, partytime. Not strictly an instrument, but certainly a boisterous music.
Rap relies on some rhymes more than others, cymbal bell may not ring true for our purposes, but Ranna Royce’s rap out “Silent Night (Carol Flow)” is BLUE ALERT violent and threatening enough to earn a spot on the laissez-faire blog.
Pipes’ll get their due, but for scarcity’s sake let Celtic Woman pair the cymbals with the “Christmas Pipes.” It’s all about the party.
It’s time to peek behind the musical curtain and see WHAT makes the novelty. Musical instruments are joyous, annoying, celebratory, and obstruction props for the holidays. Keep in mind: these are songs ABOUT the instruments, not simply instrumentals. (Bells will return to the blog.)
That is never more difficult to winnow down than with the ol’ stomach Steinway. So, sit up straight and attend.
You’re a “Christmas Accordion” according to me, belt out Mount Righteous, in perfectly awkward oompah. So cool.
Dennis Polisky & the Maestro’s Men elevate jug band to the Scandihoovian with “Richie’s Christmas Accordion,” a polka-palooza.
Let’s not neglect “Please Buy Me an Accordion for Hanukkah” by Valerie Sassyfras, a bit more klezmer than polka. And it’s a sweet family memory. Isn’t that better? (Until you listen to it.)
Sea shanty does it for me, so let’s twist an ankle to “Pop’s New Accordion” from Rum Ragged. This is a wish list from the family. It’s serious. So should your listening be.
Michael Scott Dublin (feat. Sinead Murphy) flips the script when asks “The Sad Fairy (Do You Believe In Me?)” with grating showtune vocals. Well, still magic… so the question of faith remains the same. You gonna?
Speaking o’ magic, Cory Goodrich beseeches in pop folk (tiny tots’ gospel) “Please Believe.” She did use the magic word.
The Oakwood Waits raise the rafters with the gospel chorale “I Believe This is Jesus.” Who are you pointing at?
“Go You Believe Inna Christmas” is the funny-voice Q+A parang from Goddy Goddy & Ryan Mark. It goes in circles but hits the ground dancing.
SBG / Grungatronic seems to be using the public announce at K-Mart in their “Looking for Santa Claus.” This jolly experimental number gives up quickly.
The nerve-tingling story of “Jolasveinar” as sung by The Non Traditional recounts the Icelandic tradition of the thirteen Yule Lads who visit children in the nights before Xmas. Grýla will take them away if they misbehave. Our singer does’t misbehave, but his little brother must’ve been peeking because he’s missing the next morning. Moral: more presents! Retro indie pop.
Ella Fitzgerald wants to see Santa Claus in the swingin’ “Good Morning Blues.” See, her bay-he-bee isn’t here; so, Santa needs to send him to her. Not sure Mistuh Whiskuhs needs to be there, but she said that. Big jazz band.
“Mamacita Donde Esta Santa Claus” was a hit novelty Christmas song from the ’50s (we’ve been there), but we have yet to hear the untranslated verzh looking for Santa from Chabelo. It’s a pop paradise for Señor Wences fans everywhere! S’alright! (He rerecorded this several times, including the 1981 disco edition.)
Counting sleeps is like waiting. No one likes that for Xmas!
Numberblocks does the kiddie educational thing with “How Many Sleeps ’til Christmas?” Put those fingers away and just envision sugar plums, hokay?
Close Kicks expands the same kidsong notion with the R+B soul play: “How Many Sleeps ’til Christmas?” Numbers are shouted, but it’s seductive.
The Speks rally ’round the manger for “How Many Sleeps ’til Christmas?“–a Celtic ballad with military leanings that bulls as much as lulls. Shout together now!
Red Oak Mini Singers choir up the demand: “Down Down Down the Chimney.” Pushy, but it’s churchy pushy. Please don’t die!
Élan Vital turns up prog rock for the party anthem “Down the Chimney.” Everything’s shouted, so IT’S ALL GOOD!!
Cuul Music raps when perhaps he shouldn’t for the surprising “It’s Christmas Time.” See when Santa is in the sky, perhaps the fireplace SHOULDN’T be so bright….
Dave Mansueto (feat. Lord Grunge) garage the parang for “Down De Chimney.” It’s a hands high, hip sway, voices loud good time.
Jimmie’s in the Basement gets stuck in a loop when “Santa Stole My Girlfriend.” Santa seems to respond to this folk country accusation, but expect no resolution.
Ryan Shields adds to the oeuvre with another “Santa Stole My Girlfriend.” And now SHE’s Mrs. Claus. Country for better or worse.
Foster Gray & The JJs insists “Santa is an Arsonist.” Evidence? He brings coal! Unplugged garage fooling around.
Arne Åsmund uses cowboy pop to prove in “X to the Masses” that Santa rose in the criminal ranks from lowly drug runner to strung out street person.
“Santa’s Got the Munchies” folk pops Jet Baker, implying some irresponsibility on the part of that important delivery system. Better get more cookies!
Protesting too much Charlie Stewart electro-countries “Santa Claus Ain’t a Hippie.” Hey, isn’t protesting what hippies do?
Neil Halstead covers Fountains of Wayne’s “The Man in the Santa Suit” with pathos the original didn’t have. Ah, the futility of Santa in a modern age!
Fruitcakes (give it a moment to start…) parodies “Santa Claus is Coming” with a trip to ‘The Price is Right’ to win a new sleigh. Makes him look like a dummkopf.
Nor does Dianna Corcoran take the “Funny Little Fat Guy” in a red suit seriously. Serious country rock, though. Stalking much?
D’modes undermines the whole thing in “The Silly Season.” Swinging pop criticism that STARTS with Santa. Rated M.
Worth repeating: “Fat Daddy” by Paul ‘Fat Daddy’ Johnson was a Baltimore fave from 1963 on, dug up and shared by John Waters. It’s not really S.C. but the spirit is here through jazzy doo wop RnR.
“Santa’s Getting Bigger” is charming folk from Bob Wire & Chip Whitson, who might be somewhat understanding.
Tesse slows the roll with an R+B sorta-rap “Fat Man in a Red Suit.” It’s sad, but we need to accept those things we can’t change.
Dale Jarvis dramatizes the domestic enabling that causes our protagonist to become “Fat Like Santa.” There’s a certain sound to those comedy songs for FM morning shows back in the ’90s. This is it: 15% country, 35% pop, 45% funny voices, 5% audacity.
Mr. Weebl’s 2015 Advent Calendar o’ songs included “Fat Santa Claus,” a jittery pop celebration of–a dog? Nevermind, dance!
Richie McDonald rollicks a kiddie country sing along with “Why Santa’s Fat.” Surprisingly, it’s not from overeating….
Salsa be bop from Bill Darnell and the Smith Brothers perks up the topic! “Too Fat to be Santa Claus” casts suspicion on the next red-suited impersonator. He won’t fit in the outfit!
“St. Nicholas Sky” is some odd offering from the cast of ‘Spiderman: Turn Off the Dark.’ (That show where a guy died and it never opened.) So the whole look at Santa go thing is kinda creepy. Dramatic rock, though.
Grunge parody will help! Alpha Test Pilot grumbles and groans through “Smells Like Mince Pies.” Not a put down, so much as grated praise.
Beastie Boys parody next, please! “Santa Claus!” from Brian Downton is just the right amount of shouting.
Another parody! ManiacClown & Kruxy sell “The Sack” with poor equipment but possible energy. You Are Santa.
The Rubettes (feat. Alan Williams) play it straight this time for “Santa Claus” (a speech impediment), a reverent cheer.
“Reggae Xmas Song” begins with concerns. But Robert Boog brings this island gentleness to positivity, as reggae can do. It’ll be alright.