Category: country

Some flashy DJing by KiofNC in the paltry “I Love Santa, But I Ain’t Sittin on No Grown Mans Lap.” Mixed messages.

Sami Stevens & Kaz George get moody with all that jazz a la “I Love You Santa.” It’s sad, but follow that crossed star!

“Santa Claus, You Broke My Heart” is Shallow’s epic pop opus about love lost. Heavy sigh.

Serious honkytonk from Werewandas result in some heartbreaking mishegas with “I Love You Santa Claus.” How could you, C?

It’s time to inject some romance into the snark. Let’s ship Santa and, well… you! Or me. Or someone else.

Perhaps most notoriously, Eartha Kitt owned “Santa Baby” as a (quid pro quo?) love song to Mr. Spendy. She even followed it up with a sequel the next year: “This Year’s Santa Baby” updating the gold-digging. For novelty purposes, i approve of the punk update by The Dirty Panties. But let’s close this squirmy throwback with a modernist view from Miley Cyrus on The Jimmy Kimmel Show. Me too, Santa!

Kylie Minogue stirs pop into the jazz with her extensive list of wants, but “Oh Santa” she really wants a kiss from inside that big beard.

While we’re country, y’all, Angela Watson belts out the family friendly “We Love Santa Claus.” Love CAN be bought!

Brandon M.C. points out that with new love it doesn’t matter that “Santa Brought Me Nothing.” A guitar exercise, more than an indie love song.

Any Given Sin seconds the emotion with the country-pop anthem “Nothing for Christmas.” Santa’s just kinda irrelevant here.

The Clarence Williams’ Blue Five ragtime the beejeepers out of “Santa Claus Blues.” No money means no honey, Red.

“Ho! Ho! Oh Nooo!” is insistent punk from The Bad Engrish. This is a BLUE ALERT level of complaint.

Somebody adored small children Emerson & Cassidy enough to cut an album of their lisping and spitting. “Santa Clause Is Not Coming to Town” may be social commentary on the capitalistic corporate scheme, or it may be dumb kids who can’t remember lyrics.

Jonwayne DJs old carols/movies to give us the mashup “No Santa.” BLUE ALERT!

Thomas Mac nightcaps the concept with the honky tonkin’ “Santa Ain’t Coming to Town (He’s Drinking This Year).” We’ll further deal with his substance abuse in a bit.

Worth repeating: And i’ve repeated this before… Adolphe Adam slow blues the story of how Mr. Christmas began in the incomparable “Santa Had a Dream.” Nonstop on repeat, please.

Maybe Santa started as a baby, a “Baby Santa“! Kevin! rocks the idea when this whiskerless, reindeer-milk-drinking infant would bungee down chimneys on his unbmilical cord. Listen to believe.

Joel Kopischke returns with his “Santa Claus Saint Nicholas” (Alexander Hamilton parody). Rap, and yeah. That. Well, a taste of it.

Nicole C Mullen features a spoken word story about the origin of The Winter Presenter in “St. Nick’s Groove.” Tossing gold coins through the window? A miracle!

Nick and Jenny Maciaszek’s “Christmas Legend” begins in the coal mine and follows the dream with lilting folk country. Riding the Harley through the sky… that’s new.

Gary Fjellgaard cowboys up for the time “Santa Put a Saddle on a Reindeer.” That was the moment he got strange enough to become myth. Simple country.

Car wrecks? Sleigh wrecks!

“Santa Smashed Into Our House” by Flooded Cellar is the down home country of a happy moment made quite unhappy.

Roland Buscar attempts to help out Santa after he drops dead, but the sleigh is too much for him in “A Very Ragamuffin Xmas.” BLUE ALERT rap with a bailed ending.

Mike and Brian find Santa with a broken knee after a collision, which results in a slow jam pop that maintains “Every Day is Christmas.” Misery-style, Santa is recuperating in their own home.

Torch singing, Hadley Park country divas out “Santa Crashed His Sleigh Into Our Garage.” No word how the bearded one is…

Remember, remember the fifth of December… As with Hallowe’en being the night before a holy day (Michaelmas), Krampusnacht is the night before The Feast of St. Nicholas. While THAT should be Christmas, JC isn’t Santa. But the goatman/Devil might be a product of Central Europe BEFORE Christianity spread there. Just more cultural appropriation, or melding pot, or serving up the best bits of every culture so we have the coolest one regardless of origination. Just think of the Santa-Krampus team-up as good cop-bad cop (one gifts the good, the other beats the naughty).

Too much? Then try a cartoon! “The Krampus!” from Jack Squat JB throws down some polka and funny accents to make us learn (and behave). [He also has a cute parody called “Run, Run #Krampus.”]

Jingle Daddy mixes live and animated with his intermediate class “Krampus Night!” It IS swing (as well as a Squirrel Nut Zipper parody), so hella fun.

Aaron Fraser-Nash has an homage to the 2005 film with “Krampus Sings a Song.” This growly rap (he gave us a “Part Two” too) introduces us nicely. Fraser-Nash has a side hustle of impersonating movie characters singing so he’s turning pro at this.

Before you get too comfy, I’ve gotta share Houdmouth’s “Krampus.” This alt-rock loop repeats the same two lines over and over until you get it (or you don’t). And that’s Krampus.

Upbeat pop from Les Barons brings us “Xmas with Krampus.” Disappointing Santa makes Krampus mad. Write that down.

Or p’raps heavy metal is where it’s at to fully get “Krampus Night.” Let Firemage show you.

Rap? Bludstaind gives us a “Krampus” primer of some gore.

Coupl’a more details: the chains, the bells, the basket, and the lie detector-thing. Miss FD has it covered in her “Krampus Song.” Swing with accordion.

Wild Earp uses old timey country music to craft his kidsong “The Krampus Song.” Thus the lessons endeth. Learning is fun-damental.

Not quite to sea yet.

Jebediah’s “Country Holiday Song” is a country banger about just hanging out. Maybe drive down to the pier, perhaps fish. Doesn’t seem to matter really.

Find me on a beach by the sea, Floating around, in a boat you and me, chortles Toni Das with some fine surf guitar in “Xmas by the Sea.” Tres relaxing.

Heartbroken at the navy pier at 3 A.M. Kill Hannah indies the rock in need of a “New Heart at Christmas.” That’s Christmas for you.

Brennen Leigh gets totally country with her drunkard other, listing out the inexcusable behavior–including rolling the car off the pier–to some fine honky tonkin’ guitar. “Merry Christmas Ashhole” says it all.

Scale HO for toy trains is 1:87. This is half of the O Scale and is the most popular.

Roger Miller set the standard for Xmas toy train songs with his country lullaby “Old Toy Trains.” This 1967 for his two-year-old son promised the goods but advised Don’t you think it’s time you were in bed?

1968: Glen Campbell brings a childish impatience to it.

1983: Raffi brings a childish internationality to it.

1985: The Statler Brothers bring a colorless march to it.

By now, no one wants OLD toys. So LITTLE is the new descriptor.

1989: Randy Travis brings a paternal assurance to it.

1998: Nana Mouskouri brings an angelic innocence to it.

2000: Toby Keith makes a sing-along out of it.

2008: The Forester Sisters bring mystical wonder to it.

2011: Matt Andersen brings elder wisdom to it.

2011: Jessica Lea Mayfield brings a homespun poverty to it.

2012: Mirusia Louwerse, Carla Maffioletti and Kimmy Skota bring a celestial transcendence to it.

2013: Inuit Susan Aglukark makes it a bit of a chant. (With Native translation.)

2013: Restless Heart make it redneck somehow.

Let’s end with the 37-year-old Dean Miller looped into his dad’s original recording for a duet. Touching.

Not exactly commuting, the American classic hobo did use the train system for shelter and support.

“Oscar’s Christmas Lament” by Hadnot Creek zips together blues and pop country to explicate the hopes and realities of the boxcar life. Tough stuff.

Protest singing from Bill White makes the same points the hobos make: trains are the only way to go. “The Christmas Train” is hard driving blues for those on the tramp.

“Santa Fe Sam and Hobo Bill” make the best out of hungry exposure around Xmas playing the What If game. Boxcar Willie does that talky sad storytelling to the weepy violins. …then there’s the miracle of ham and taters and all the fixin’s. Was it a dream–?

“Hobo Christmas” from Sharp & Cissell has that driving rock rhythm that elevates country to Americana, so their sad story is fun.

Grunge country splashes water in your face as Old 97’s sing their “Hobo Christmas Song.” Side effects include toe tapping, yodeling, and eye rolling.

Actual fiddlin’ country from Matt Andersen brings a nobility to the “Hobo Christmas Train.” Makes you feel like takin’ a gap year and joinin’ in.