Category: jazz

As God is my Judge, DANIEL is a book in the Bible. 

One of my fave-o saxophone-driven pop noodles is The Rosebuds’ “Christmas Dan“. I picture a Giuseppe Arcimboldo portrayal kind of guy. He’s the coolest.

Also can’t pass up the opportunity to repeat the spoken word horror of John Tabacco’s “Daniel’s Sled“. There is a Daniel. There is a sled. There is a hell.

Might as well include Tom Waits’s cover of The Ramones’ “Danny Says” too. The pathos of an up and coming band on the road during the holidays is never better served than with laryngeal dystonia.

Little Danny Harper receives representation from Bailey and Zane · Randy Matheson. See, “He Sang His Heart Out (Every Christmas)” even though he warn’t very good. Country lesson in acceptance (didn’t know they had those).

Joe calls Dan to kiss his Kids on Xmas day, since he won’t see release until July. Paul Kelly wends through many country roads with a thoughtful concern about “How to Make Gravy“. Seven more friends and family get named, but i think i’ll keep this personal snapshot.

Danielle Apicella assures you know she’s unattached and looking for “Somebody Else For Christmas“. Someone calls out her name incredulous by way of prologue. R+B rapping.

Also lonely, because that bitch Danielle called out, Azmerous belts out the kvetching show tune “Holiday Weekend (Musical Version)”. It’s a work thing.

“Dani’s Christmas List” is a comedy bit from Microwave Miracles. Dad and Dani review 32 items–you’ll never guess what they are. Or be able to scrub them from your traumatized memory.

“Dani the Christmas Mouse” by Doc Mooney is a sped up voice about a holiday friend. Not sure if it’s kidsong, or drug-fueled prank.

Andy, Ben, and Carl want dumb stuff when Daddy asks. Danny, however, sings the country duet”All I Want for Christmas is a Dad who Doesn’t Drink“. Harshing the buzz, boy. Wickham Palmer Selection does not hold back with the passable AI.

Alder H. Linden involves neighbor Dan to find out who’s coming “Down My Chimney“. Dan solves the home invasion with whiskey and dynamite (or possibly a football team).

Daniel Gorgonzola wants you to have “A Very Daniel Christmas“. Not because he’s singing poorly. Because he’s Daniel.

“Christmas Is Cancelled, Daniel” sings Cordelia with a minor key desultory pleading that doesn’t seem to single him out so much as guide him. Can it indie.

“Christmas Daniel” is a bit of a boor, according to the jazzy indie by Another Banger. Doesn’t like Xmas. Is not a good lay. Brother.

A mispronunciation of day’s eye, DAISY is fresh, flirty, and a nickname for Margaret (?).

Sharona sweeps AI over the rock and roll of “Christmas Kitty Rocks“, about a pinball of a cat named Daisy. What a mess.

Shaffiate Ishmael honors “Daisy“, the Queen of Parang, with a Christmas parang for her. This must be Daisy Voisin who passed 35 years ago.

Bill Frandino’s “Daisy” uses her Christmas wish to keep Santa safe in a winter storm. Her impromptu song/wish is as bad as it is good. Spoken with kidsong.

Keepin’ it cheap, Wilson G. Firefingers strums out “Daisy’s Happy Christmas Song” like it’s the end of his set. Whew. Rock (after a fashion).

Jump blues return with the story of one Daisy Mae. “Hey, Santa (Hey, Daddy)” by Sweet, Hot & Sassy! is her list of greed and want. Sweet harmonies counterpoint.

This one’s easy. COOPER = barrel maker.

Bloom fingertips the cool jazz namer “Cooper the Christmas Caterpillar“. Tres chic.

Short for Butcher, BUTCH is the manly man (or woman) with a thumb on the scale. This is actually used on birth certificates almost more than once a year.

Cherry Poppin’ Daddies recorded “Butch the Gay Santa Claus” in 1998. Rights were just around the corner, so the pop hate-joshing seemed light of heart, Matthew Shepard notwithstanding.

Today we get more along the lines of “Santa Butchie” a rote parody of ‘Baby’ posted by Butch Talk. Lesbian humor?

“Cranky Old Butch” seems to be another epithet for good ol’ Santy according to Dystopian Noize Factory. In this gentle jazz tribute, reverence is paid.

Could mean bird, could mean First Woman… AVA is self-contained, short palindromic perfection.

“This Kind of Christmas” by Howlin’ Chip is AI funky country, almost convincing. But it’s confused subject matter about fears and tears and wars and jukes–at least there’s a bartender named Ava.

The protagonist in Davis Smith’s carol isn’t a social butterfly. He attends the Xmas party reluctantly and does NOT fit in. He does notice Ava’s with John (huh). But he’d rather be “Home Alone“. Kick ass pop.

Morris & Rivers’s “Shopping Mall Santa” deals with too many names (oopsie), including Larry (night shift) and Timmy and Hunter (lap sitters), but in this jazz lounge torch burner Ava stands out–asking Big Red for a blowtorch. Burnout’s a’comin’.

Dorothy seems to be you, provided you are a dinosaur, in The Wiggles’ “Will You Dance With Me Around The Christmas Tree?” Kidsong with a hint of psychedelia. Okay then.

Why Don’t We make with the music, not the meaning so much, in the R+B love assault “With You This Christmas“.

“Are You Coming Home for Christmas?” wonder The Webb Brothers with rocking love.

Tom Odell means well, but will be “Spending All My Christmas with You (Next Year)“. Timing, my man. Bluesy rocking pop.

Wheelchair Full of Men center me into a novelty universe with the barely BLUE “Merry Christmas, You Son of a Bitch“. It’s an off key indie toast to an alcoholic.

While novelized, let’s give an ear to Waylan St. Palan & The Magic Elves ragtime declaiming “You’re Off the List“. He knows when YOU’re naughty, not when I’m naughty.

“Where Were You On Christmas?” BulletRiddled asks, a drear tone suggesting you know more than you’re letting on. Spill! Where’s your soul?!

When The Peter Pan Christmas Players sing “Won’t You Come Home” it’s not for Bill Bailey (same tune), but for Dear Andrew. So, that’s who you is. Kidsong, for Christmas, probably.

As childish, R+B pop music from Liz Thresher, “Wrap Me Up in Your Cheer” flirts with candy canes and reindeer games. Odd.

Chris and Bri champion codependency with “Wrapped Under the Tree“. It’s gotta be you. Sassy R+B.

Jump Back Jake favors thoughtful lyrics with his reflective, self doubting “Xmas Time“. It’s a profession of love, from an amateur. Driving blues rock.

LaLa Deaton torches “You” all loungey and jazzish and heavy lidded. She’s got moves, vocally.

Jeff Dunham voices his dummies for a holiday wish “From Us to You (The Whole Gang)“. The Whole Gang in this case is the US. But with this watery country pop, who cares?

The Boston based ??? make fun of you, or themselves, or brain damage with their frivolous “It Reminds Me of You!”. Pop doggerel, with your daily allowance of irony.

The Wiggles mean someone especial when they kidsong the pop of “It’s Always Christmas With You!” They mean Santa. But they say you. Kids get it.

Why can’t we all just get along. Stop you’re crying. So singeth Jamie Cullum in his big swing band number “It’s Christmas“. Brassy!

The Haystack Cookies take their feet off the pedal with their thoughtful band number “It’s Just You & Me (This Christmas Eve)“. Very slow dance.

Amazing Amar explains “It’s Xmas Everywhere You Go” in measured jazz slush, just to let you know you’re interchangeable with it. I’m not sure how happy he is about this.

Music with Mar. finally adds some kidding to our month with “Happy Holidays to You“. Kazoos herald Santa. Dreidles spin under the candles. Insistent wishing.

The Whispers Motown their harmony for “Happy Holidays to You“. It’s quite a production for such a simply sweet sentiment.

You and me, according to The Crystalairs, will make a “Happy New Year“. Christmas, too. Doo wop warmed over with R+B.

This year I want you alone, explains jardinière covering The Maine’s “Ho Ho Hopefully“. Not sure who ‘she’ is in this context. But, you got this. Indie monotony.

Kat Perkins draws a line with “Holiday for You and Me“. If you cross it, you will have a good time. Unpasteurized pop.

Dave Barnes is thinking about you while picking out a tree. “Holidays Made for Two” is finger popping lounge jazz, but he gets it right.

“All I Want from Santa” is an ukulele attack from Martin Blasick. He only wants one thing. It’s you. Cue the trombones. Cazh blues with an island air.

“All I Want from Santa, Baby, Is You” is a bongo approach from Ralph. Beat blues that’s up all night… for Santa… and you.

“All I Want Is You This Christmas” is an AI attempt from Dennis Johnson. It’s traditional country whining, unimproved by algorithms.

“The Cute Lepers Christmas Song” is a punk workaround from Cute Lepers (duh). Loads wrong, you’re right. Sounds like love.

“Anything But You” is a provisional from Vista Blue. See they don’t want anything… [insert title here]. Romantic garage.

“Apricity” is a requiem from Bri Kaye. It’s focused on YOU, but your absence drives the New Age indie sorrow. Doesn’t look like that absence is ever going away….