Year-round Yuletide oddities
Jenny Alien slips in some BLUE ALERT with her clubby EDM “Skating Rink.” She’s failing at clubbing, but lives next to that icy palace. Something’s not working. Except the hot mess of a song, that slaps.
Sport Game gets more gnarly garage with “Figure Skating.” Seems reflective. Can’t really tell.
Wovoka Jr. tries some “Star Skating” but loses me somewhere around Saturn. New age-y alt explorations of hypnotic strength.
Blippi presents the tutorial “Let’s Go Ice Skating.” Slick pop kidsong which insists falling is okay. Zamboni solo!
Rachel Rambach (Listen & Learn Music) endeavors to entertain the wee ones with “Skating ‘Round the Rink,” more kidsong but without lessons. Just doing it.
Kahika is just “Skating Through,” or getting by, draping along, or muddling through… you know, managing somehow. Almost reggae inspired jazzy slow pop.
Marcus Buddy Vincét recommends “Ice Skating” as a palliative for grief in this experimental jazzercise. Eerie.
Håkon Lervåg uses “Ice Skating” as a crowbar to demolish his relationship in this quiet folk cry for help.
Tod Got Overexcited! comes to the rescue with “Ice Skaters Lovers Time,” a song about Christmas and Santa and voyeurism and awkward moves (and vocals). Bebopping pop. Just what i needed.
Little Baby Bum and Friends narrates how “Ice Skating” is such good fun. Kidsong pontification.
Muddying the waters, Eric Evans raps out the problems he’s got with you “Ice Skating.” Get it off the rink, son.
Sherwin Sleeves and Roy Harter grate out the horror, the horror of skating down the stream in the genre-smashing “The Christmas Skater.” Is it a train? A bad breakup? The encroaching darkness that will swallow us all?
Romance and skating on ice are nearly one and the same in the R+B (hoo, hoo hoo hoo, hoo) singalong “Christmas Wishin’” from David Davis. Holla.
Different Boats is in the friend zone, however, after mixed signals from skating. “Season of Sadness” is a maudlin rap without lashing out in anger. Sorry for your heart. (Crash cart! Stat!)
Connie Landers dredges up the ol’ ’60s rock’n’roll with “I’m Gonna be Warm This Winter.” That sleigh ride helped, but the ice skating cinched it.
The trees sway, the lights shine, the people skate… oh, yeah, and “Bells are Ringing.” Above average pop from Bella Nicole to get you in the holiday spirit.
Peachy Keen has music for your dance moves. Do the reindeer! Do the elves in the workshop! Do the ice skate! Hard pop for “Christmas is Coming.” Nearly gospel.
Do a slow one now! Kristof X Tóth Réka practice their English with “Dancing Snowflakes.” In this off kilter pop THEY are the snowflakes, on skates, on the rink. In love (i think). Aww.
If you want to break my heart, know we are skating on thin ice. I ain’t a hockey player babe, I won’t put up a fight. But I’ll give you a pass if it’s after the holiday’s. So “Won’t You be My Babe for Christmas.” Kam Stewart’s brassy alt pop is the hesitant love song of the new gen.
So it guess Santa met his missus figure skating. That’s so by Lea Salonga’s “Even Santa Fell in Love.” Sweet, yea syrupy, orchestral pop. Almost kidsong.
Amanda Lehmann hearkens to fairy tales more than to Santa myth in “An Old Christmas Day.” This Celtic inspired pop, Jack Frost will be waiting to go skating with you; Aurora shimmers in the icy view. Blustery cool.
CJ Soul (feat. Jasmyne the Flower) takes reality in stride when Xmas has “Cali Vibes.” There’s nothing like the snow machines at Disney; Hope the Queen Mary ice skating rink ain’t too busy, Cause we bouta get our skate on. Travelogue rap.
Brett Eldredge’s “Mr. Christmas” is NOT Santa Claus, but he seems to be your sugar daddy. ‘Cuz he’s in big band love with you (you’re skatin’ circles round his heart), and he wants to make your spirit bright. This sizzles.
Distance creates its own reality. When Maye is far away, she wants to “See You This Christmas.” With powerful diva pop (excellent pipes) she wants to go ice skating even though you are awful at it. Bring a camera!
The Easy Button picture a picture postcard when you are skating across the lake and on the frozen streets. I picture infrastructure failure. But “It’s Christmas Time!” is energizing rock/pop, so let’s delude ourselves.
Showing off a few English language traits, David Cavada uses mystical pop with his hoarse vocals to craft a “Christmas Present.” I got: everything is fine. And snowman getting a smile. Not sure about the skating.
Rane has “(No Need for a) Snowy Christmas” because he has ice skating. Not sure how that works, but the folk-pop insistency convinces me he’s on the level.
“It’s Christmas” for Marcus Latief Scott when his brother wants to hit the slopes and others are skating. Am i missing a social hierarchy in the cold weather substitutions for walking? Party rap wit’ lotsa Yeas!
Colbie Caillat has more of a “Happy Christmas” as she remembers holding Grampa’s hand while skating back in the day. Country (for the messaging) but unabashedly pop (for the happy part).
“Rockefeller Center” is a bitter regret for November Cold. After she passed, you realized you never went skating like she wanted. Rocking BLUE ALERT remorse.