Month: August 2025

Xmas Music Delivery System: Choir (novel)

No law says to the Christmas singers have to be dull as dirty snow. Let’s have fun with the choir.

Asking you to join the Christmas choir, Ester Brohus jacks gospel into the bluegrass “When It’s Christmas.” More interactive, more joyful.

More melodic, Patti Page makes a round out of her “Christmas Choir.” 1955 pop. More dizzy for me.

Seemingly unimpressed, Lennon and pj plonk their way through another indie observation of late December. Choirs are just another unavoidable incursion. Fun drinking game, every time they sing “Its christmas” take a drink–of milk! Look, i dunno if they’re horsing around here, but i dig this.

Sad and alone, Amelie Jat cheesies the pop of “Christmas Before.” None of that stuff matters now. When she hears the choir, she won’t look for you at her front door. I guess the opposite happened regularly or something the love police should look into.

Christmas choirs singing/But my heart feels cold tonight, complain Boogie, Beats’n BBQ (feat. Alice Menotti Monro). “The Ghost Of Us (Only You)” is AI country pop of whispering whimpering.

Also The Marijanovic mopes in sniffling, dramatic pop about missing his “Christmas Kiss.” The choirs will be happy, but he won’t. So there.

Lovelorn Jonathan Meur indie moans that the choirs are mere echoes when hanging out in Manhattan, during “December By The Isle Of You.” Fancy wordplay for a Frenchman.

Busted up, Jonny Phillips cries out how the choirs through Zoom don’t help. This is just “Another Kind Of Christmas.” Pandemic messed with this poor boy. Emotive pop.

Muy tragic, Nathan Samuel gasps out how The Christmas choirs/Ain’t singing “NOT this year.” This is pretty tragic missing you stuff. Kinda folk.

Angry agendas are hidden in “Wise Men from the East.” Timi Tamminen copies and mocks all the headlines from the 2020s, like Ayatollah Khamenei joins the Christmas choir. War time! Amusingly pedestrian punk pop.

Oddly impersonating ‘Wonderful World,’ Astrid Allegra’s “A Wonderful Time” notes all the fixtures of the holidays, including choirs natch. Pleasant parody.

The “Christmas Day Care Choir (Falala)” from The Crying Day Care Choir questions the validity of the Xmas icons. By whose Authority! Fun folk sing-along.

“Fairytale of New York” features a choir of NYPD cops serenading the drunk tank, and we’ve heard that before. BUT… have we heard it from Gregorian (the chant group)? Well, sadly, we’ve heard the rock background before. Wish they’d lose that.

On the other alto, “Christmas Without a Choir” is not like Christmas at all. Chris Avison carries on with the easy listening to posit his logic. It takes a while.

I guess you don’t have to alive to celebrate. The “Spectral Christmas Choir“–according to AI–or at least Girard, conjure carols from the grave. Now the zombies, take the pop chorus!

Xmas Music Delivery System: Choir (standard)

What delivers music? Singers deliver music! Noticing choirs is only natural when sensing the seasonal sensations.

The Oak Ridge Boys call and response with their country hokum in “Christmas is Painting the Town.” Everybody gather round and sing: la la la la.

Just the kids by themselves can still recognize that for the “Miracle Child” that angels AND other choirs were singing. That’s what you do when you’re The Starshine Singers.

Yes, kid songs can be just as unoriginal. Sing-a-Saurus cultivates “Magical Christmas” from stockings, cookies, choirs, etc with all the magic of a corporate bottom line.

“Christmas Time” as moaned about by Sharon Coutanche has singing and ringing and all the -ings. Redundant children’s pop.

Paul Anka knew, even back in 1960, that when bells were ringing, choirs were singing when “It’s Christmas Everywhere.” Symphonic pop. That’s a lot of strings!

In so many words, I’m Dan He’s Dave call out the “Symbols of Christmas.” It’s a laundry list, but the folk strumming is careless and the figurative language is acknowledged, so la de dah.

Ronnie Mislay, just as pointedly, points out that choirs are singing when “It’s Christmas.” Country pop, or at least the worst of both.

More mealy mouthed country from Aurosa, “Merry Christmas, hear the choir sing” sings what it says. Twangy times.

“I Remember” sings Barbra Streisand when she would watch choirs singing carols on TV. That was last year, right? Her usual easy listening diva-fest.

Also crooning the obvious, Ray Charles notes choirs singing “This Time of the Year.” It’s like you don’t even have to see them. Slow soul.

Rocking folk Jay Kaje proclaims Choirs burst ye forth in song when “It’s Our Christmas Time.” Slightly better standardization.

Yeah yeah yeah: ringing, singing, Doris Day…. 1950’s “Christmas Story” has all the old timey pop bells and whistlers. Take a picture, it won’t last as long.

More bells and choirs when Jordin Sparks belts out cool R+B explaining “Christmas Time to Me.” Okay, checks out on my list as well.

Kicking back, We Love Christmas watches “Evergreen” and listens to choirs like there’s not a pop song care in the world. Relaxing.

Frankie Avalon croons about this “Christmas Holiday,” but seems appreciative of all the trimmings, as with the choir boys singing. 1962 easy listening pop.

Swinging the basics, “Best Time of the Year” sends Sonic Tree Music (feat. Gary DeMichele) to the stratosphere of cozy fires and Christmas choirs. They make with a mouthful of hi-fi, daddio.

Christmas Choirs are singing/Christian songs;/Heathens are drinking/Promise poeticizes the Magic Epic in “The Christmas Express.” Haunting birthday indie.

Leaning into the cliche, Marshal Keep tells us what “Christmas Is“–and he oughta know, he’s a Christmas kind of guy. Fire and choir rhyme for the endless listing in this ironic pop. Funny.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Orchestra

A small group of the musically inclined could just be a band of brothers, but a roomful of instrument wielders needs organization.

In “The Miracle of Music” one is led out of the London weather into a secret performance. Minutes later, I found myself in a Christmas symphony/A magnificent orchestra playing from the balcony. R+B and rap from Lily Amis, Thir13een. And then I woke up.

AI “Jingle Bell Christmas Bell Ring” credits Faylin, Pasoed Saichaem for existing. In this menagerie of fanciful celebration Let the orchestra lead the festive march. A marching orchestra?? Silly pop.

In the indie “This is Christmas” we are met with an orchestra of children’s laughter, but I have to include it because of the band’s name: The Velvet Tomato.

“Snowfall” is more tinkly indie and William Hut’s falsetto and unleashed poetry places us Here in this orchestra, the city of strings. Evocative verisimilitude.

Much more orchestral, “Christmas Symphony” brought to us by Shep Fields & His Rippling Rhythm Orchestra (Thelma Gracen vocals) takes us back to 1950.

“Santa’s Crazy North Pole Orchestra” is about as swinging as you can get (tuxedoed penguins!). Dennis van Aarssen delivers.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Band (Christmas)

Ramskyte a cappellas “The Christmas Band,” a rowdy Gregorian pop anthem that would make a lovely TV sitcom theme for something 1969.

The Annual Christmas Album Band takes its sweet time getting to the music of “Thank God for the Christmas Band.” But the bluegrass makes it worthwhile.

Bing Crosby fronts The Andrew Sisters celebrating the toys’ party for “Poppa Santa Claus.” Oh, what a fete, the toyland band played! Symphonic jump blues.

It’s Lizzy Hilliard who will play in the band, provided she’s answered “Is It Almost Christmas?” Soaring indie.

Jack White seems to promise a band, but only when “Christmas Time will Soon be Over.” Hillbilly folk, like bluegrass.

Handy, ‘cuz Lord Brooklyn is looking for “Bandz For Christmas.” BLUE ALERT rap with needs.

The “Christmas Freak,” Nisha Baksh, spends her time listening to the Christmas band. Rushed pop.

More oblivious, Balloon Planet is so in love that “Greatest Gift of All” might be accompanied by a Christmas band, or not. He only has ears for you. Jazz pop.

The Christmas band is only one curiosity during The Swing Pearl’s “Christmas Stroll.” Offputting big band cacophony.

Same with Ben Coleman “On Christmas Day.” Britpop synthiness.

“The Christmas Band” from Like There’s No Tomorrow seems to be all reindeer. Slow rock. They don’t really fly.

Perhaps an introduction is needed. When The Snow Angels present their “Xmas Is Here” they end their ditty with the declaration: Don’t you understand we’re your Christmas Band. Their odd rock/pop style might just be noise.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Band (angels)

Heavenly hosts are usually on key, surely they can hum a hymn of so in honor of Xmas.

In “Christmas Must Be Tonight” from The Band, a band of Angels sing amid all the birthing stuff. American country. I mean, it’s The Band.

“Heavens’ Christmas Choir” is AI country by Broken Heart Rebels. You can imagine what goes on here.

Cori Connors makes it religious when she gospelizes folk for “Heavenly Choirs.” By, for, and at the children.

The Fallen Angels Choir spin The Beatles for their “Fallen Angels’ Bleeding Hearts Club Band.” They’re no angels. They’re mothers.

“Hark the Herald Angels Sing” is right there, so let’s open the parody door and see what spills out. The Fab Four start with The Beatles’ ‘Help’ then get more trad. Thanks to Pete da Elf for cluing me in to dat ‘un. John Valby drops the bottom out of the BLUE ALERT civility. It’s OFFensive.

Killeen 3000 churns out reverential easy listening with “When Christmas Angels Sing.” More elementary than elevating.

Hollering for all that’s holy, Justin Wilson preaches “When Christmas Angels Sing.” Dixieland pounded out into something else.

Xmas Music Delivery system: Band (marching)

For Nashville Cast (Lennon & Maisy) calling out the marching band means “Christmas Coming Home.” Must not be Minnesota. Flailing pop country.

“Christmas in New Orleans” returns, sassed up by The Speakeasies’ Swing Band! It may be Santa leading the marchers, but it’s Dixieland (with a Creole beat). Kick up those heels.

While wishing for an old fashioned Xmas, Wildson (feat. Revel Day) easy listening s “Oh How I Wish.” Rudolph’s marching band makes an appearance.

From the Monster Christmas Mash kids’ high concept album, The Party Players chant out “Creep Castle Chorus Marching Band & Dissecting Society” with Frankenstein, the Wolfman, Dracula, and Igor. High stepping.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Band (North Pole)

More organized song making from Santa-Land.

Just a little echo of something fantastic. Robby Grant’s “North Pole Christmas Party Band” rocks, alt-rocks, and indie rocks.

Line Materials was a thriving plastics corporation what pressed original children’s holiday records every Christmas for their families of employees. In 1957 they jazzed up the ante with “Santa’s North Pole Band.” Wild, daddio.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Band (Santa’s)

Has Santa Claus got time to form a band? Has anyone?

“Santa’s Music Band” is the instructional children’s song from Maureen Conlin. Choose your instrument and you can play along, like kids do.

Leonard Wolf comes out and asks you–yes, YOU–to join “Santa’s Band.” Country rock that bashes kidsong.

Frosty the Rock Star supplants music with AI by means of “Santa’s Got His Rock Band.” Sorta like rock. He’s rocking around the moon.

Again with the AI from Children’s Tunes becomes “Reindeer Rock ‘n’ Roll.” Less R’n’R than sqidgey pop.

Who is that “Rockin’ Around the Sleigh” right here? It’s Santa’s band, as AI rocked from KIMSUNGHOON.

“Santa’s Workshop Rock Band” is the off key country rock version by The Ab3. That’s one playful guitar.

Rich Chambers rocks so hard, he claims “Santa’s Rockin’ Band” invented Rock and Roll. Hard to dispute.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Band (Salvation Army)

Live music, sadly, never rocked me. I prefer virtual. But, some people do make the joyful noise for other people. Hats off.

During a somber Xmastime, “Interplanetary Salvation Army Band” plays to the stars. Ollabelle’s dirge-y indie begrudges the season.

Phil Keaggy’s gift from the “Salvation Army Band” seems to be eternal life. Hope you kept the receipt. Blues rock that takes over the joint.

Not all these pin down the Christmas fund drive, but Bobby Bare’s “New York City Snow” misplace a Boise boy into the winter of the East coast. He’s down and out, but it’s that time of the year. And the band played on…. (Later he, with Billy Joe Shaver, hopes that “Jesus is the Only One That Loves Us” in a city of sin, to the same musical backdrop.) All classic country.

The Mountain Parade gets into the spirit with “Salvation Army Band,” a brass-heavy sermon on hope. Spirited indie.

Wait, you only recall the bellringers? Then lean in to Paco Moreno’s “Salvation Army.” That’s all there is.

MercyMe starts singing To the rhythm of the Salvation Army bell ringing. But they rock out pretty hard when begging “Hold On Christmas.” Pogo.

Over the Rhine can tell when “Darlin’ (Christmas is Coming)” when Salvation Army bells are ringing. New Age indie fun.

Turning the other cheekiness, Hot Buttered Elves stage a riot with “Salvation Ringing” behind. Metal like. Hard to look away.

Helen Love & Ricardo Autobahn retro the indie (?) for “And The Salvation Army Band Plays.” It’s wistful, if not downright down in the mouth. But that’s an insistent beat. Yeah.

Xmas Music Delivery System: Radio [Santa Claus]

Is that Santa… on the radio?

On the Citizen Band, erm “The Christmas Band,” Dan and Jay’s Comedy Hour recounts how Santa barely made his epic promise true through shortwave radio. Country rock.

Hilary Duff verifies that “I Heard Santa on the Radio.” Synth pop with extra cheese. She can sing, right? I can’t tell here.

Or is it–Santa’s radio? Zydeco time from Dustin Ray Lantier complains about his used purchase, the “Louisiana Show Truck.” Santa used it, busted the antenna. Tha’s a party.

BLUE ALERT rap advises Don’t ever turn Santas radio while he’s gone mother fucker. Redrum Red ping pongs through “That Holiday Spirit” for all the good and plenty of the bad.

Bill Crosby country rocks “Santa On The Radio (I Wish)” with a request line. Get it? No lap sitting! Phone it in! The honky tonk edge here has got me on my feet.

But “Santa’s Radio Frijole Call In Show” is a fart show. Spoken word from Poochy plays like a sketch of an improv bit.

AI from MMMC signals “Santa’s On The Radio” with doo wop of the preprogrammed sort. It’s the jive-tivity!