Category: Childrens

Damn That Holiday: DamNation.8

Just a couple more bad-mouthed carols.

BLUE ALERT! latewaves is mad as hell and still gonna take it while rocking “Hungover for Christmas.” So Merry Goddam Christmas….

MattstaGraham hits the garage with wishes of a Merry Goddam Christmas in the head banging “I Can’t Keep Up with the Holidays.” BLUE ALERT Good save on that last note.

I’ll be damned If I let another Christmas Go to waste laments Jon Bakke over “This Christmas.” Just a touch of Celtic to liven the pop epiphany here.

Dave Sweeney and the Kickin’ Mules tweak kidsong with some pop backbeat and bitch about waiting all damned year for a “Christmas Cookie.” To your room while I get the soap!

Yo Ho Ho Ho-Old Salts (& Young)

Making with the kid assembly song, Maynard Music brings us a kids’ choir proclaiming “A Pirate Christmas.” Band music, but short.

Pirates love Christmas, according to Tiny Tots. Yet, Santa seems ignorant of delivering gifts at sea. He’s got a prejudice that these freebooters were bad. But what about their children?? Who’s the villain now?! For an answer, try “Pirates Christmas Day,” a folk/easy listening tale as old as the briny deep.

Yo Ho Ho Ho-Hornswaggled

Knight_Legend22 posts another collection of “Pirate Christmas Carols.” Well done musically. Not the funniest. Did like the line: a Santa’s life for me.

David Rovics fires up the kidsong to recall how Santa dealt with an economic collapse by becoming “Pirate Santa.” Man’s gotta treat, and without bounty–that won’t sail. Clever and well done.

Yo Ho Ho Ho: Blown Me Down

Beer Bucket Social punk posits “If Santa Was A Pirate” perhaps so they’ll not run out of beer. Light-hearted fun.

At times i am impressed with the talent Disney throws money at. Sure, they’re a money printing machine and it’s all by formula, but the pop rock of Jake and the Never Land Pirates chortling “Yo Ho Holidays” goes down kid friendlily.

Yo Ho Ho Ho-WhiteBeard

Does Santa have a pirate designation? According to School District 49 it’s ‘Mad Jackson.’ But i’m not feeling it.

Don’t forget Patchy the Pirate who introduces ‘SpongeBob SquarePants.’ He also introduces the Christmas special. With the theme song, and ‘Christmas!’ shouted at the end.

Parry Gripp’s triumphant return to our blog features funny voices, pop music, and rap, so… not my favorite–sorry. “Pirate Santa Claus” is a reformed plunderer, teaching kids important lessons. Yawn.

Yo Ho Ho Ho-Lads’n’Lassies

The Wiggles’ returning pirate character Captain Feathersword gets a holiday lesson concerning pigging out in “It’s a Christmas Party on the Good Ship Feathersword.” He’s a friendly pirate, ‘cuz he refers to all you out there as ‘me hearties.’ Aww.

Captain Fear Facer won’t face joy in the Sing-Along with two sides: “Pirates Don’t Celebrate Christmas.” To be honest, it’s Oliver the crocodile who eschews, Capt. FF persuades him otherwise in this too-cool-for-school earthy pop song.

Yo Ho Ho Ho-Avast Ye

Hello Wonder indies “Dear Santa (A Pirate’s Request)” from the daughter of a pirate to the only one she knows who can make her dad nice, not naughty. Too cute for words!

Captain Dan & The Scurvy Crew ask Santa directly for cannons and whatnot in “A Pirate Christmas” all the while planning on ambushing, robbing, and slaughtering the jolly old elf. These pirates bite off more brass monkey than they can chew. Kiddie rap.

Yuletide: Santa Salt

Is Santa qualified to be on a boat?

Ty Thurman wonders “If Santa was a Sailor,” then what? Kidsong (with a merry country backbeat) follows to spell it out to all y’all. There’s a list.

Gordon Mac Martin gets scarier with his “Sailor Santa.” He also asks If, but worries that climate change will require this as the coasts decline and we all live at the ocean. More Carib beat.

Yuletide: Santa Cargo

Santa by sled, by plane, by train…? How DOES one get ’round the world?

Savage Bell rocks out the Florida answer: “Santa Rode on a Shrimp Boat.”

A jolly, nearly yodeling, dad pop ditty,”Santa Clause Comes by a Boat” by Gary Fjellgaard, intends to surprise us. Kidsong wonder. Not the real kind.

Bandana Man has “Santa B Cruzn” become the story of Rudolph saving the delivery day in the Caribbean. Santa likee! Steel drum calypso-ish.

Brent Burns paints a grander landscape with his shanty “Santa Boat.” It may be about the deliveries, the it’s tarred in mysteries. Fun kid sea myth.

On Track to Xmas: Cab Forward!

1950 big band kiddie stuff sounds like “The Christmas Choo Choo Train” by Art Mooney and His Orchestra (feat. Laura Leslie and The Skylarks). Clarinet flourishes.

Chris Walker seems to karaoke “Happy the Train,” a kiddie song about the train that looks forward to Christmas. Jaunty, perhaps even jumpy. Lots of sfx! Pop.

“A Magical Christmas Train” is a spiraling pop number with odd segments of authentic folk and childlike reverence. James Coffey burns up the keyboard!