On Track to Xmas: Meet Me at the Station!

Meeting cute on the train, but having already broken up Nicole Andrade lisps through “This Christmas” as a cautionary pop song tale against being alive.

Tangential, “Boy Wonder and The Christmas Tree Girl” from Nicole Tesseyman & Steve Carrigan involve runaways with colorful nicknames, living off the con and the big bad London, once they take trains. Jazzy folk that rocks.

Also sad, Christian Rowe thinks this “One More Christmas” could be the last with you. I know your train leaves tomorrow but you don′t have to go, he begs with New Age-y pop. Moving. A bit.

Taking the last train, Night Flight can’t shake the sense “It Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas.” Perhaps it’s that ponderous New Age alt rock. That doesn’t feel like music.

Back to the country music with Stan Rogers. So, sad. “First Christmas” is about the very young children. But the daddy is working 3000 miles away–in the mines! Mother is waiting at the train station… but, i’m not sure this is going to work out. Life sucks!

On Track to Xmas: Mind the Gap!

More Christmas commuting! Street car rattles down ole Saint Charles in the colorful blues of Steve Cavalier’s “Merry Christmas New Orleans.” Cut offs and hanging moss and beignets fill in the corners. Pretty chill for the tropics.

Frothy pop from Bedbound by Summer reveals a deep seated love/dread about returning home for the religious revival. Are they “Depressed This Christmas“? Try this refrain: I hate love; I hate you; I hate me.

I won’t be home for Christmas Darling, not this year; The trains have all stopped in their tracks begins the sad bubbly pop of “Star Crossed Christmas” by Barnaby Bright.

The Brits know about train travel. OneNamedPeter tinges his pop with a whiff of punk in “Christmas is Cancelled.” Why so down? Now my train is moving so slow, By the time I get home my Amazon parcels Have been sent back to the depot. But there is hope in there… somewhere.

Spoken word poetry from Croydon Tourist Office skewers the bourgeoisie in “Christmas in the Suburbs.” Traditions are trash. Ceremony is senseless. Hope is less. The Salvation Army’s music stands Getting blown over By the updraft of a passing train. (But check out the Brit pronunciation of urinals!) Just my cup of soap box oration.

On Track to Xmas: Stand Clear of the Closing Doors!

Subways are trains too, eh? When i look at subway my mouth is watery; I’m always waiting for christmas to hurry: quoth Young Shaun in the childlike rap “Dear Santa.” Despite squeezing a ‘Polar Express’ allusion in there, he runs dry pretty quickly.

Comedy excerpt: “Urkel on the G-Train” (skit) from Retrospec is not a song so much as it is an annoyance. ‘Member Urkel?Now REALLY imagine him on the subway!

The O. Henry tale (retold by Joni Mitchell) “Gift of the Magi” is barely a Christmas idea, but it is set in the big bad city and–in this version–a character catches a train in order to be foolish. Light urban tragedy made folk.

Jenheiser jazzes up the transit with “Before Midnight.” Christmas can just wait for the train. ‘Kay?

Trains can start in the city, then travel cross-country, then back to cities. I don’t schedule ’em but–ya? Enya verisimilitudes the journey with “Trains and Winter Rains.” Lotta sadness. But it’ll get you there.

On Track to Xmas: Tickets Please!

Catch the last train home, it’s nearly Christmas! Matthew Oleson seems to improvise a folky ditty about travel and getting far away in his “Lonesome Freight Train.” Safe travels, man.

Not sure about getting home–after all it’s a train trip–Popdorian employs a thick accent and Eurovision pop beat to reveal he’s “Coming Out for Christmas.” Not just home, but honest too. Take your time.

Bet Smith and the Currie Brothers make “That Christmas Train” the centerpiece of their seasonal celebration. Bluesy guitar pops open the tree-getting, popcorn-stringing, and baking. Most importantly, they listen for that whistle to blow. Woo-woo along with ’em.

Carey Bell gets so funky with his bluesy “Christmas Train.” It seems a special ride, but it’s all about getting home on time. I feel it.

On Track to Xmas: All Aboard!

Themes for this year are about Winter/Christmas people moving. Less seasonal would be the locomotive train. Horse drawn since 2000 BCE, steam driven since 1809, connecting all continental interiors since 1890… but then surpassed by automobiles and airplanes soon after that (and we’ve already covered those concepts/machines in this music blog). (Okay super speed trains revived us in the 1960s and their environmental edge becomes apparent by 2000). But here in the USA (esp. West), most people just don’t. Heard of ’em. Seen ’em in the motion pictures. But not all aboard.

Yet, Christmas and trains DO go together in so many ways: traveling home, choo choo toys, Santa’s magical ride, hey–even that little electric thing around the tree for decoration! Trains can even be a great metaphor for the holiday troubadour.

Merle Haggard tells of the family that wants Grandpa to visit. They won’t go see him, and he won’t get on a plane (what in the name of Hallmark is the story here?)–so it’s time for “Goin’ Home for Christmas” on a train. Maybe he useta be a hobo. It is country music, see?

Chet Nichols overlays the country with New Age in his “Christmas Train.” Another homeward run for one and all. Nice scenery!

Whispery country from Elle Carpenter whitewashes a “Colorado Christmas” in Norman Rockwell tones (kids in pajamas on the train drinking hot chocolate for cryin’ out loud). It’s a ride.

Trans-Siberian Orchestra growls out prog rock (knock me over with a shovelful of coal!) about a lonely man taking a railway trip. Something about no one meeting him at the station, and a single set of footprints… i’m not sure about the story here either. But “The Snow Came Down.” That’s for sure.

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Wait, i’ve got more snowmobile songs!

Jimmy Jenson (with thick Scandi-accent) warbles over the accordion with “My Viking Snowmobiling.” That’s one tricked-out pony.

The Marty Gold Children’s Chorus treat us to “Roaring Sam The Snowmobile,” a kidsong of choral roaring.

A cute but clumsy parody of Jimmy Dean’s ‘Big John,’ “The John Deere Snowmobile Song” seems to be an extended ad musical theme. Worth it.

Another seeming ad is the equally unattributed “Ski-Do Song.” Brief country pop, with an instrumental chaser.

Stompin’ Tom Collins gets down with the popular country of the ’70s in his “Snowmobile Song.” Cool as carnivals, cats.

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Been having some fun bending the rules to find skiing songs. Let’s push the envelope a bit more (it’ll still be stationery).

Buddy Wassisname and the Other Fellers lead us into this fresh hello with “The 12 Elan.” Celtic folk salutes the Ski-Doo, a skiing machine! Clunk! Diddly-dump! Delightful!

David Anthony Berg tends more country with “Snowmobile Cowboy.” It’s all about that loud noise. It’s branded.

Imaginary Friends (w/Bert Collins) help a crashed Santa with a “Little Ski-Doo Christmas Song.” Jug band polka! For the kids!

Jud Strunk’s 1969 “Santa Song” celebrates the new mode of transpo, the Moto-Ski, with folky rock. Those reindeer were so unreliable.

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Taking a drive to the wintry slopes, Joey Clarkson elevates pop with killer pipes in “Cold Christmas.” I see a sled… and mulled wine. Might i suggest skis instead?

Fat Little Bastard’s “Impending Doom at the Ski Lodge” is a suspenseful drama of electronic twittering. Is that a helicopter closing in–?

Marcus Latief Scott sees people out ice skating, but My little brother said let’s hit the slopes! “It’s Christmas” shouts the R+B. Get wit’ it.

Danny and The Juniors twist and shout with their 1964 bandstand grandstand “Let’s Go Ski-ing.” Do you get the boogie woogie in there? I do! Get some!

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Eva Via scams the fam at the holidays with a pretend boyfriend. But “Make ‘Em All Believe” is more romcom than psychological desperation. When I remember going skiing during MLK day — all those runs; I say that we should try this another month. Thus, true love.

“Ski Lodge in the Late 80’s” by Comfort Noise is a palate cleanser of an off-brand instrumental. Scraping, screeching, pounding. But it works.

Strangely exotic, “Embrace It All… Feliz Navidad” is more Carrib than Mexican. Mami Ishibashi (feat. Mayan) swings it. The skiing might be on Gulf waters, though.

Pixie and the Partygrass Boys actually suggest skiing in their bluegrass rafter-raiser “Ski and Party.” Boy howdy.

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Hernando Tangjaya feels that when “It’s That Time of the Year” it’s pretty great. Sharing, caring, skiing high and low, you know. Piano pop that doesn’t know when to stop.

Kymm bums us out with the heavy metal instrumental “Dansk Puzzle with Boobs in Ski Lodge.” Don’t be fooled by the nomenclature, it’s relentless riffs.

Speaking of relentless, the “Ski Slope Safety Song” from the video game ‘Vacaction Simulator’ must be sampled to be believed. It’s not what you think.

Someday Cafe (feat. Andrea Schmidt) fall through the season pass when they wind up in a “Snowfall.” The magical beauty greeting gives that old run-around for directions: You go through the flannel fairway, down the cinnamony slopes; We’re a common destination for the happiest of folks. But the charming pop makes this weird detour so worth it. Bravo.