Category: rock

Battling the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross stages around the holidays finds little solace, and almost NO empathy. Stay in the spare bedroom with the guests’ coats, fer gudness sake.

“GRIEF IS THE ONE THING CHRISTMAS CAN’T FIX” insists David Bannon with persistent country rock. I suspect an invitation to join his congregation next.

“Christmas is a Grief Bomb” by Hetty White is a lively frolic through losing… well you pick. Your cat counts. Even Mother Mary saw cross beams in the manger. Christ’ll pick up the tab. (I’m babbling due to shock from listening to this.)

“Christmas Mourning” by Michael Allen Howard shouts out to loved ones in particular. But the chipmunking and kidsong melodies give one pause.

Salem Ilese takes a more morose method with her “Christmas Mourning“. New Age indie ethereality.

“Christmas Mourning” by Loser Company also draws out the notes in order to make this shabby indie into a dirge. Mission accomplished.

“Christmas Mourning” by Gavin Prophet advances to further stages as the garage pop goes rap then back. It’s a bit pissed.

Men and Mountains bestow “The Gift of Grief” with enough garage banging and caterwauling as to make a grown man cry.

The Crocodile Shop really rocks “December Mourning“, but not in a fully cathartic way. More of a party way.

The source of much television mirth, this crippling inability to function imprisons personality. Let’s have fun with that.

“OCD Christmas Elves” by Backbite is frothy pop AI that revels in delusion and insanity. Just some DSM catchphrasing.

“The OCD Of Christmas” by Malcolm Tent is ’12 Days’ about having to redo a gift endlessly, so inappropriate and annoying.

Pandemic blues elicited a “Socially Distanced Christmas” a condition when sung about by Matthew Jordan includes OCD. (‘Cuz bored…..) Showtune pop.

Just plain obsession evokes more perfumery than red flags, vis. “Obsessed with Christmas” AI folk pop by Bill Barlow.

More concerning:”A Christmas Obsession“, sinister AI orchestration from The Blake Robinson Synthetic Orchestra (ft. Gloom Darkheart) follows a creeper.

“(OCD) Obsessive Christmas Disorder” grew out of this. Brandon ‘B. Liggy’ Ligon raps about it for us. Well, thanks.

Joe Roggi identifies as “The Christmas Lunatic” due to his obsessive behavior at the end of the year. Call it method celebration. Bluesy easy listening with rocking guitar riffs.

Bah & The Humbugs included a lovely solo number for Santa in that pirate musical I’ve mentioned before. “I’m Not Obsessed” is a real symphonic soul searcher for the elf.

AI with personality, “Obsessive Compulsive Christmas” by Shagrats Ltd plays hob with the condition AND light rock. Suffering for our entertainment.

Taking a step back, bipolarism (manic depression) may be a seasonal disorder in one form or another. Well, i can relate.

Grinch by day, Santa Claus by night, ProJudah plays bluesy pop “Bipolar Christmas” with a laff track. Seems willing to embrace it all.

Blaming schizophrenia, Katie R Dale stares you down with “The (Bipolar) Christmas Song“, a parody of that chestnuts number. Resignation here.

Atombuzz celebrates “Bipolar Christmas” with grunge and a reluctance to fully enjoy it. Bleak? Just use it for a career in the arts!

Roger John sails through his “Bipolar Christmas” with kickin’ parang. I keep waiting for the down parts. But dancing while i’m waiting.

Liquid Fluid Water comes to the rescue with the depressing “Bipolar Xmas“, a showtime of the bluesy jazz variety.

4 Aspirin Morning is floundering through their brass heavy blues “Bipolar Christmas“. It’s a hard climb back up.

Delta-9 dissolves into syhthed madness for “The Part Time Bi-Polar Elf…“. It’s carrib and EDM and rock and indecipherable. (Ask me tomorrow what i think of it. It’ll change.)

“It`s Not Christmas Everyday” is usually a lesson reminding you to be as good as you can be all the time. But in the chords of Bright Paper Werewolves, this trope takes on a sinister and random slant. Reminders to behave come with a raised hand warning. Rock into metal.

The Colors Turned Red rock “Back By Christmas” about returning to the city, provided it’s not too shitty. Provisions don’t suit the celebrations, but you do you.

“Lying in the Snow” with nowhere to go, Isaac Stancill also takes exception to your cliches. Rocking country oddness.

Johnny Setlist’s “Christmas Time is Here Again” does not bode well for any of us. It’s all crap, garbage, and stuff we hate. Lounge pop with an axe to grind.

The Original Cast of Naughty… but Nice! is sick of Xmas songs, so in “Naughty and Nice” they sing about their discontent. Wait– what? Showtune, sho’ nuff.

Arne Hansen & The Guitarspellers toast “Seasons Greetings to You All” out of both sides of their mouths. It’s hard to say (they say), but it is rocked.

A deranged family is enough to make Matthew McLaughlin feel disconnected from the “Holiday“. Plenty more beef in this peppy alt-pop, but it’s all unbalanced.

Radar & Satellite singa bout hope and joy in “Christmastime“, but their creepy vocals and thrashing metal backup make me uneasy. The parts about Santa knowing all your lies, or losing your spouse are not traditions in my domicile.

The loss of faith and friends is also not on my list of Xmas affirmations, but Lori McKenna makes a seven course out of her “Grateful“–an idea she aspires to rather than embraces. Folk.

Make Like Monkeys is my goto for fun holiday retro pop, but they have a dark side. “Christmas Doesn’t Last” is about drunken failing; “Isn’t It Christmas?” is existential angst; and “Hollow Holiday” is just mopey. Bummed now.

Valerie Warntz wants to “Shake Up Christmas” and she spins a tremulous tale of a boy and girl on opposites ends of the world wishing for love… but the folk pop song ends with no resolution. Well, crap.

The loss of Father Christmas sets off a “Cynical Christmas” for Wild Earp & The Free For Alls. Honky tonk blues that also gives up on Jesus. Look out.

“A Not so Merry Christmas” occurs when love is lost, so say The Boxmasters. Sashaying indie pop, bordering on 1956 RnR.

Apparently spoofing their own hit, Jones Earthquake Band punk rocks out “Another Boring Christmas“. With a smattering of BLUE ALERT they say what they mean.

If I could have a friend like you in my life/Then I guess I’d be doing just fine may sound just a bit standoffishness, but with the young it’s cool. “Everything’s Gonna be Cool This Christmas” is an Eels bid to chill with some indie rock. Gaspard Royant jazzes it his cover with an almost boogie-woogie affability.

Perhaps rising above uncaring “Hopeful for the Holidays (Remastered)” by Full Service rocks the folk with meandering monotone. But the refrain goes: The best part of life is… nothing. Uh, what-?

Obsessing over the seasonal sadness, Automatic Timers croon indie onto those “Midwinter Cracks“. Hope springs in three months or so.

Tinkling the ivories Ian Coss goes minimalist with the holidays in his half jazz- half whatever “The Realist“. Not the person to invite to your mixer.

Classic Pat rocks out on Xmas possibilities–like that don’t wanna fight song from The Ramones, “On Second Thought” he does wanna fight tonight. So much for goodwill to all.

Do you believe in Hulk Hogan? He knows if you’ve been naughty….

Heelbook’s “The 2013 Pro Wrestling Christmas Song” strums the uke, spins the folk, and brutalizes the manger.

So does Anita Lorraine Moore with “Christmas Wrestling Song!” This time, suspicious are aroused.

“A Very Wrestling Christmas” from Cultaholic (with an Andre the giant solo), folk rocks beyond this into bona fide novelty.

WrestleTalk belabors the analogy of believing in JC and believing in Rowdy Roddy Piper with the “Wrestling Christmas Song“. A spoken march.

Dave Rudolph honors the parody over the sport in “Here We Come a Rasslin’“. Ha ha ow.

“Wrestlemania Christmas” by The Yule Logs honors the sport over the holiday. Can you smell what the rock and roll is cooking?

The Boys of October don’t worry about Xmas, except the stores are already full of decorated trees by the end of the World Series.

This is explained in the country drawler “Baseball Stops for Christmas“, a slow snort fest from Alvarado Road Show. See what you give up so Jesus can be born?

“Santa Claus Plays Baseball” is more AI from something called Happy birthday kids – babies. Sprightly kidsong.

Again Ai from Tan Man Baseball Fan with a “May Your Christmas be a One of One“. Sort of country asking Santa for another pack of save ’em or trade ’em cards.

Chat Farnsworth gets garage amateurish with his “Baseball Christmas“. Worse than AI? Please stand for the national carol.

Almost unlistenable, Taco Bum screeches “Baseball on Christmas Day” for your listening pleasure, or at least that pleasure you get when you trick someone else into listening to it.

Rocking “Hours Outside in the Snow” Modern Baseball plays ball with the coldest holiday of them all.

Community halls for the hopeless call of a carol or two! B-Joyful!

Snook merely sets “Bingo Balls” to ‘Jingle Bells’ so don’t get too merry.

Liam McKenna and friends amp the reverb beyond discernibility for “The Turkey Bingo Has Been Postponed (Until Further Notice)“. It’s a holiday bummer of a slow pop song.

With all the hedonism of a Saturnalia, ArtAcoustic’s “Christmas Time in Adelaide Tonight” carries on wantonly with sloppy club rock. Someone’s gonna yell out BINGO….