Category: jazz

I tried to master the sweet potato at one time, even serenaded Jimmy Hollister on his KEX radio show back in the day. But i was terrible. It only had five holes in its ceramic body, still it was beyond me.

So let’s get goofy! 2 Dudes and a NES folk ballad us with “Link and Zelda’s Loving Christmas Love,” a young man’s early lessons in dealing with the opposite sex. And how to portal through these video games.

Three Sock Nonsense plays le jazz hot to overwhelm my senses with “Soap on a Rope.” The contents of the Xmas stocking we sneak a naughty peek into includes a blue ocarina… but there’s OH so much more. Mercy.

This wild wind-up stringed instrument with a keyboard is the party you did not get invited to.

I’ve been listening to a Sting song about a “Hardy Gurdy Man” from his Christmas album, but it’s not really a Christmas song. It’s a timeless tale of fleeting fame or some such misery.

Ryan Chisefsky’s “Hurdy-Durdy Christmas,” however, is the improvvable song about scatting for the Season. Jazzy. Something else.

Again: One of my favorites has Bill Wurtz contrast silly pop froth with coffeehouse beat iconoclasm. “Christmas isn’t Real” is awesome sauce, from that gossipy Easter Bunny to the two dollar scat.

“Real or Fake (Shit Ain’t for Everybody)” is the rap expose by way of Von Carter, BLUE ALERT and all the tea is spilled.

The Partitioners–also BLUE ALERT–party up the disappointment with “There is No Christmas.” Old timey rock’n’roll with a grudge.

Social Fever (feat. Diana Timbur) smash the 88 keys for the jazz purrer “There Is No Christmas Without Science” (Remastered Version). It’s the age old dilemma of faith: what we see vs. what we want to see. Cool.

Trying again, David Phelps returns us to 1983 for the hypothetical country rocker “If Everyone Believed.” More than Santa seems to be at stake here.

Looking over the evidence of Santa’s visit should be a “Beautiful Morning.” But Darkcave’s soothing indie take on this seems like the aftermath of a tragedy. Kids are going to need therapy here.

Blasphemous Basement (feat. Sinnysounds and Babbling Blubber) hit us with an experimental mixed media “Santa is Real” full of opinion and criticism. The debate is hotly contested.

“Santa Claus is a Real Guy” by Dnice and the Experiments tends to dink around but that’s all well in good in the Believe Santa campaign. Swallowed pop.

Comic relief from Eva Via repurposes the concept. “Make ’em All Believe” is about convincing the family that I Do Have a Boyfriend. This Guy I Brought. See? Poor recording of a pop hit.

Occam’s razor tells us when it smells like a rooftop landing “It Must Have Been Ol’ Santa Claus,” here revisited by Keli Vale. Changes a non-believer into a suspicious investigator. Ragtime fun.

Bucky Cash & The Low Point force the folk out of the rock in “Merry Christmas (If You Believe).” It’s not a contest, but you lost.

Southern Dogwood leads Sunday School with the pop quiz “Do You Believe in Christmas?” Santa is NOT one of the answers. Nailed to trees IS an answer.

James Lee Turner gets more secular with “Do You Believe in Christmas?” Lights and stockings get more airplay than God here. He’s name-dropped once. Could be AI, definitely dull pop.

Ben Inglis might require translating subtitles when he pounds club rock in “Do You Believe in Christmas?” Is Scots a dialect of English or nae?

Rebecca Turner dreams a dream only to recommend hugs and kisses when she asks “Do You Believe in Christmas?” Atonal folk (jazz?) that relies on the third eye more than the three French hens.

Eight million billion may be too many children for Santa. “The Grinch’s Dream” by The Yev is happy fantasy from The Mean One about Christmas interruptus.

Noelle Rose has pretty mundane dreams: trees, snow, fa la la la. Is her dull pop “Christmas Dream” an illusion, or a Target commercial?

The “Christmas Dream” of the Tartan Lads is of home. The heath, the heather, the weather… ’tis Scotland! Jesus is name-dropped as well.

What is he dreaming? asks the Christmas Choir with Murgatroyd & Burrell. Well, in “Teddie’s Christmas Wishes” the stuffy wants a… friend! New age kidsong.

Isaac Nightingale (Вадим Капустин)’s “Christmas Dream,” on the other hand, is pictures in his mind. This jazz lounge journey has a bit more suspense.

Time for electronic metal, kids! “I’m Dreaming of a Murdered Christ… mas (2023 Remastered Version)” is Sakura Pups chasing rainbows and petting kitties (kidding!).

Tony Trinidad has “A Christmas I Dream Of.” It’s pretty standard fare, i wouldn’t call in Freud or anything. A vocal coach might help this become the rap it wants to be.

Don’t let your “Dreams” be Memes warns Foster Gray and the JJ’s. Garage plinking wanders around the topic, so not as Christmassy as it could be.

When you’re not on the scene Kerry Pastine and the Crime Scene can only “Dream of Christmas Day” with an awesome bossa nova backbeat. Is that ALL you can do?

To sleep, perchance to dream, ay there’s the rubber mallet to the head. Not to get all Lathe of Heaven, but dreams can replace reality for those poor in living. So, what about the dreams about (for?) (because of?) (next to?) Christmas? Are they always White? Are they always of Sugar Plums? Or, are they merely Rorschach Ink Blots that reveal more about the dreamer than tell the future. Naturally, some are daydreams or wishes. Plenty are about dreamboats. We’ll analyze them ALL.

Scotland seems to blend indie with rock for their slumber time brain activity. Dropkick’s “Christmas Dreaming” is full of possibilities, open to interpretation.

Kimo Williams prefers “Hawaiian Christmas Dreaming.” With the slack key, this slow pop gets wistful, some might say dreamy.

“Christmas in Dreamland” is fluffy kidsong, although a bit strident as Johanna Lewis instructs us into how to be asleep.

Getting an early start is the Tyler Bernhardt Trio with “Christmas Dreaming.” It’s jazz-tstic. (Yeah, Sinatra does this, too. So what?)

A cappella jazz from Flying Pickets dings us the dongs of Christ’s birth in their “Christmas Lullaby.” Groovy as cash for Xmas.

More a cappella from Parry Music, but this “Christmas Lullaby” is ’70s TV variety show material. Woof.

Time for a public service denouncement: Jennifer Hudson headlines the ensemble cast gospel “Hush Child (Get You Through This Silent Night).” Hunger, anger, and fear are not easy to sleep through.

Go to Sleep and dream of Christmas, begins Richard Shelton’s jazzy lounge number “A Christmas Lullaby.” Cool as a jack and soda on ice.

“Stuff Stockings” by The Moby Dicks brings hard garage to bear upon the act of intimacy. Ouch.

“Red’s Xmas Socking Filler” has a very je nail BLUE ALERT charm without much stocking. Rocking, however, yes.

Not sure you got that? Try The Eggnog Crew’s “Stocking Stuffer” on for size. By song’s end you’ll know what he wants for Xmas.

“Stocking Stuffer” is Ocean is Theory’s sexy, bluesy take on making it through the dark holidays.