Sure sure sure, BILL is short for William, but Billy Boy is such an entrenched sobriquet–and i have SO many songs for the B-name–, i gotta give him his due. Duck lips! Restaurant reckoning! Law draft! Hat visor!
Let’s get past the missed-it-by-that-much comedy from Brett Gelman & Paul Scheer “Bill & Ted’s Christmas“. The cultural flashpoints are aged out, the humor is too much Beavis and Butthead. Off color more than blue.
An AI rocker about the movie Gremlins?! It features Christmas and Billy and his warning “Don’t Feed Them at Midnight“. So, here it is.
More movie riffs from Davey Dips deals with Billy’s “Post Traumatic Santa Claus Disorder“. Damn dark rap pop.
American Death Cult blind stomps through “Billy’s Christmas Party” with a death metal wont. Scary.
Just as scary, Billy was so naughty he gets “Tofu For Christmas” and it wants to hurt. Tofu Vibrations hollers the garage hit of the season.
Time for a hero! “Big Brave Bill Saves Christmas” by stopping Snowman Sid and rescuing the young and the old. Delightful Celtic ballideering by Kate Rusby.
Some rando puts on the suit and becomes “Santa Bill“, a memory cherished in funky blues by Brad Peterson.
The Incorrigibles go for more of a nuanced great guy. “Wild Bill’s Wild Christmas” is country drunk for the holidays.
Little cousin Bill wants to see the mall Santa, even though Birthing Stirrups reminds him of the delicious potato pancakes at home. But it’s all “Steam Rolled Santa” downhill from there. Very upset garage.
On that same album they reveal the fate of “A Christmas Sweater for Billy“. It’s the last thing he ever wore. Bereaved garage.
More enterprisingly, Dr. BLT (feat Brian Benson) garage maintains “Billy Wants a Job for Christmas“.
More upsettingly, Hot Buttered Elves tell the tale of “Billy’s Gift“. A nice boy who wanted a puppy gets the New Age indie treatment. What terrible tragedy could befall this?! And then he did –what?!?
“Christmas Eve at the Dew Drop Inn” by Flooded Cellar involves a drunken Billy, hot rodding, and blind driving. Garage a go go.
Regrettably metaling to the tune of “Jingle Bells (Billy’s Christmas)” The Venom Berries recount a naughty Billy and the hijinx what ensue.
When naughty, “Billy and the Christmas Coal” play a duet, according to Chance Hunter’s country AI-flavored banger. Wait for the twist ending.
BLUE ALERT when snowboys2k14 parody The Beach Boys with “Little Saint Billy“. No, i don’t get it.
I do get “Billy the Christmas Pig“, a spoken word children’s book about an orphaned animal–not a reindeer–as sung by The Gift of Christmas Players. Some prejudices are celebrated.
Less stigmatized, “Billy Bob the Hillbilly Goat” makes a show around Xmas as monotoned by the folksy Betty Overstreet.
Red Sovine’s “Billy’s Christmas Wish” about a freezing human orphan gets a tear jerkin’ cover from Brian Allan.
Jim Bobo & Hank Mitzell come across that same orphan in the honky tonk tinkler “Little Bill At Christmas“. Same reactions.
Comedy from wan•abs features the shady door-to-door knocker “Salesman Bill” around the holidays.
Santa schools Billy in the odd off-key “Santa’s Wishes” as spoken worded by The Unemployed Orchestra. Presents? We don’t need no stinkin’ presents!
Billy-envy is a thing in the rapped “Jelly Christmas” by Lexly Nirvana (feat. 1K Phew & Belle). Don’t look for lessons here.
Kidsong nonsense from NanaBananaKidZ AIs “McChilly Billy the Snowman“. Hyperactive.
Barry Ward has a scary flashback during Christmas ’99 of a heroic GI name of Billy in “Christmas in Chu Lai”. Funny thing is, Bill refers to his sacrifice as Christmas in July (mispronunciation mine own). Country pop ballad.
Billy, the boy scientist, invents a “Christmas Time Machine” in order to catch a ride with Ol’ Nick. Piedmont Songbag slings the boggie woogie without apology or explanation, just like i like.
Billy, the aspiring artist, was so good “Billy Got Drums For Christmas“, pop with a killer backbeat from The Hooves. Screw the neighbors.
Also blessed, Isaac Koshy’s Billy has “A Wonderful Christmas” getting the perfect present. Couldn’t tell you what it is from this rocker.
“Little Billy’s Christmas” turns out pretty good as well. Country Gary knows what a country boy wants. Country music! And a robot.
Mike Stackhouse lightens the country when they offer to “Hit Bill with a Toaster“. Non-material things seem to matter.
Yet another ripping yarn, “I Saw Your Father Beat A Man To Death In Tesco’s” from Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer recounts Billy’s da Dickie doing the dirty deed at the worst possible time. And the song he sang to Billy. Music hall rap.
“Billy Got My Bike” complains Jacobsen Brothers after the Xmas booty has been compared. Folk pop for kids who want to know how to balance the scales. of unfairness. Lessons learned?