Christmas Countdown: 1-900

In “The Greatest Gift” The Christmas Cards seem to think the baby Jesus was born 1900 Christmastimes ago. Or was it something Emperor Trajan did then? This whistling folk plonker shoulda stuck with the gifts at 6, 7, and 11. They were more entertaining.

Back in the 1980s the 1-900 phone lines were money-makers for Hulk Hogan and New Kids on the Block. You could get an insult, a joke, or a prayer a day for a few extra dollars on your phone bill. But, as with the internet afterwards, sex ruined everything. Matt Rogers’s “Have Yourself a 1-900 Christmas” should explain the scam if you can’t see it coming. Oh yes, and BLUE ALERT. Kids get permission.

Glad to listen to Krista Detor again. “One Too Many Christmases” explores what’s she’s got for the holidays–that loser with one too many charges to 1-900-HONEY. She’s through with that, though, the hot country beat proves it. Heave ho ho ho, bro.

Christmas Countdown: 1914

Here’s the big WWI story from film, book, opera, Dr. Who and on and on…

Kmaa Kendell’s “1914” is a school lesson showtune of considerable vocal range.

Truce” by Tom Robinson is the bitter folk accusation that gets more sweetly melodic when the killing resumes.

Ode to the Christmas Truce of 1914” has Marshall Hattersley belting out folk worries like gentle rain.

A Silent Night 1914” by Jerry Lynch is the MacConnell ‘1915’ song sung correctly. Haunting Irish music hall.

Even more Celtic, Pvt. Angus Turnbull introduces and narrates “Christmas 1914.” Catherine Rushton brings a women’s sensibility to the folk sung drama that approaches allegory. (Spoiler alert: Angus doesn’t make it.)

Next is Francis Tolliver who also Gaelic was there for “Christmas in the Trenches.” All brothers regardless of accent.

George Marinich sings about a single soldier as well, his grandfather, in “Christmas 1914.” Slightly upbeat folk pop.

Way united, “1914: the Carol of Christmas” by Military Voices raises and sings like it was angels and devils together.

Slipping in the Deutsch, Sieben’s industrial folk pop “Christmas 1914” makes the temporary peace a cabaret.

Experimental jazz rock from Sean Crimmins makes his “Christmas 1914” about the infernal war/peace machine.

Keegan McInroe bring a Yankee lilt to his folk “Christmas 1914.” Well, shucks.

Almost cowboy, George Ensle’s country folk “Christmas Truce of 1914” marches to the beat. But they don’t rearm.

Almost Bob Dylanesque, The Celtic Social Club gets rockin’ raucous with their “Christmas 1914.” Hey now.

Antipsychotic Cocktail bang that guitar whilst warbling their sorrowful folk “Christmas 1914.” Doom’s next.

Perhaps bluegrass… Annie Clifford’s “Christmas 1914” is a whining choice between shooting or smelling them.

Or–hillbilly country from A.J.H. Gillis & the Delusions of Grandeur. “Christmas in Leuven 1914” muses folksily.

Just country (with a Johnny Cash intro!!) comes Colin Raye’s “It Could Happen Again.” What, momentary goodness?

Country pop from Garth Brooks, “Belleau Wood” is the prettiness of peace, the warble of war. Ugh.

Indie pop then; “Merry Christmas (1914)” by Our History swings and sways almost inappropriately.

Just pop!! The Farm brings the sides “All Together Now” with dance rhythms! Kudos for the video’s elder sync. The Oppressed do this one too, but PUNK!

Metal? The half spoken, half screeched “On Christmas Eve, the Infantry Sang” from Future Perfect bangs a picture.

Death metal rewrites history. “Frozen in Trenches (Christmas Truce)” by 1914 shreds the tonsils to kill. BLUE ALERT

Just odd is Cod Sent Flute’s “Back Before Christmas (1914)” about fighting/dying, but Xmas is in the title only. Gas!

Jimmy Lee Morris’s “Christmas 1914” is a more gentle, approachable unplugged folk. Many covers abound.

A white flag begins the cease fire in “Christmas 1914” by Mike Harding. More echo-ey folk sentiment. Others covered this.

Christmas Countdown: 1916

Paul Gillis reduces Irish “Christmas 1916” to desperate hardscrabble worn out joy. Folk tragedy. Learn from it. I guess.

Janne has penned a nine-minute three-part German folk opera in 2015 known as “Christmas 1916.” Fairly rocks. It’s The Great War, natch, but late at night (near Xmas) one soldier lights his cigarette, on t’other side of the trenches another takes the shot, then there’s a dreamy walk down a sunny lane and thoughtful humming. Not exactly Wagner. But that can be a good thing.