Novelty Christmas Music

The Winter Failure puts out a Christmas Album every year. I thought i hit pay dirt when i found The Winter Failure Musical, but it turned out to be a colorful story about Roger’s quest for love OR a career (he gets neither). The songs in-between the funny narrated bits are modern standards (“All I Want…“??), however, so more of a revue than a musical.

I will instead rely on P.S. It’s Christmas, an original high concept album about a human named Grizzly abducted by an alien named Far-Naz (for short) (“Dear Grizzly I” explains some with a showtune/kidsong kick). After returning to Earth, they write songs to each other daily (“Dear Grizzly VI“–a dance indie), bros helping bros with romantic tips (vulnerably alt: “Gosh I Hope She Calls“… in response Far-naz offers to crater her in the rocking “Dear Grizzly III“) and other existential crises (the big folk music ask: “Why“). [Some of these songs have appeared on the blog afore.] The folksy indie approach surprisingly adds to the sentimentality of friendship (“I Can’t Wait!”). It’s Xmas totes adorbs especially in the new age “Dear Grizzly VII” where the alien spots Santa! I’d see this if it were ever staged!

Notice has been had on the ‘Nativity!’ series of movie musicals beforehand. But in 2017 a staged musical was put on the boards retelling that story of battling primary school pageants (the posh vs. the public). Guess who’ll win the contract to be made into a movie! (No one, that was a lie.)

Plagued with multitudinous tiny voices reverberating in ‘harmony,’ the best of the over two dozen pop & rock songs feature soloists and their inner struggles. “My Very First Day at School” for example. On the other stage left, however, “Our School Nativity” is a series of audacious auditions with sob stories (like in ‘A Chorus Line’), followed by the resentful, regretful “Dear Father Christmas” in which the kids heartfeltedly wish for better roles. The kids’ show, finally, is skippable. Before then the “Herod! The Rock Opera” is but a smattering of screaming, but the borrowed Andrew Lloyd Webber guitar riff sells it for me. Another quickie, “Review,” caught my ear, as the most horrible man in town savages the public school’s previous unassuming attempt. Yowza.

Let’s get nuts. Songs are the backbone of my blogging, but they’re also the spine of the musician, the vertebrae of the album structure, and the central nervous adjunct of the on-stage musical. I’ve been in a dither lately when I resisted someone foisting the Star Trek musical episode soundtrack on me, claiming i wasn’t a fan of musicals. But that’s like NOT being a fan of music. There’s good and there’s bad. [Granted, here on the blog, i always include good and bad songs together… but i’ll snarkily judge for y’all.]

Musicals are an expression of story: full of character development, plot twists, setting context, and philosophical outcome. Then there’s book and score. One group is an excuse for the other. For our purposes, the songs matter more.

[I’ve stumbled over many a musical during my years of sampling so we’ll revisit some songs, but we’ll avoid all the Hallmark mistakes that toss in a number or two, and all the church/school jamborees for the 2nd grade performers, as well as the BIG SHOWS like ‘Holiday Inn’ and all those TV specials you know inside and out {For a much better blog about those see: ChristmasTVHistory.com}.]

To begin with, the tragedy of the Rouse Simmons (‘the Christmas Ship’) has broken wave before on the blog… but Chicago boasted a seasonal run of “The Christmas Schooner” for twelve years beginning in 1996. Set in that fateful pre-Wars year of 1912, the troubles with immigration (“That’s America“), poverty (“Song of the Hungry Peasants“), and modern morality (“Loving Sons“) supersede Christmas (“Winterfest Polka“) and the impending shipwreck itself (“Questions“)–the show ends by the final voyage the fictional Molly.

The 1910s Midwesternism of the setting lends itself to an operettic feel for the show. Each number is a warbling/belted out old-timey stretch. The drama of the big success of the first run of trees in “The Christmas Schooner” works well for that. But, i’ll admit a fondness for the suspenseful foreshadowing in “What is It about the Water?” Lots of shouting braided with boys’ choir and journaled angst. And pretty piano, too.