Category: other holiday

Parodies’ Paradise: 1953 “That’s Amore!”

Okay, douglove needs a little holiday break….

For the next couple months i will share the sincerest form of flattening, copying someone else’s tune. But inserting a Christmas song to it! Totally. Some people are spot on this paro-deus form of musicality. Bob Rivers is the Obi Wan of it all. ApologetiX will be featured again and again as masterful Christian cover-makers. Robert Lund (from FuMP) fills in FM stations with his latest jiggery pokery. My man here Joel Kopischke has a cottage industry in performing little shows THAT time of year. As do The ’60s Invasion. Many amateurs post their talents. Other big deal ‘tubers (like KeyofAwesome) bring studio quality to the fun.

So, we’ll wend our way through the decades, stealing stats from Wikipedia to clue you in to the monster hits that are the targets here. (None of the originals will be linked; they aren’t Xmas. So there.)

Let’s get going.

Dean Martin’s signature number tumbled out of his Martin-Lewis pic ‘The Caddy’ and was nominated for an Academy award. It hit number 2 as a single later and has followed him like the smell of cheese since (many enjoy that smell).

Gentile Joel Kopischke reminds of of other holidays with “That’s a Menorah.” Sing a long! Now just the Jews!

Behold a Star: Marilyn Monroe

Norma Jeane Mortensen was a foster kid bounced around homes and careers and men until she became a glossy prop for Americana. Whether or not she ever was allowed dreams of her own, she became the dream of millions and that’s all that needs to be said here. Sadly.

Lou Mencell and His Mambonicks has a listing January 1955 on Billboard for new pop releases. His hangdog nasal “All I Want for Chanukah is Marilyn Monroe” has been featured on my blog before. But come on. It’s cool.

United We Christmas Tree Stand: revolting

Yankee Doodle is an insult, of course, but we know how to reappropriate tawdry phrases in this here land of the i-hear-what-i-want-to-hear, home of the  shut-your-immigrant-faces.

And no better starting point than K-4 in our public education. Plank Road Publishing offers several easy-to-learn musical numbers for kids for special events indoctrinating, educating, and amusing all at once.

Sitting through these free-for-alls in asbestos-ridden antique auditoria is not the same as listening to music. So let’s not worry about the sampler-sized parcels available from Teresa and Paul Jennings’s work. (These are the adverts for the musical directors at elementary schools–I am NOT going to attach the home movies of any performances.)

Suffice to say, “An All American Christmas,” and “Yankee Doodle Santa,” and “Yankee Doodle Christmas” all sound like someone has an unrequited love of music, a bureaucratic devotion to children, and a carefree sense of history.

Chanukah List: items four & five (ukulele, hippopotamus)

Slightly confusing is Alison Faith Levy (helped by Karla Kane) strumming away as earnest as a rabbi on Larry King Live with “All I Want for Chanukah is a Ukulele.” Oy gevalt.

Mr Palindrome tweaks the old ‘Hippopotamus’ novelty just the slightest which only adds fuel to the fire over whose holiday is ripping off whose. Nice trombone touch on his “I Want a Hippopotamus for Hanukkah.” The Jimmies rock their version if you feel like some real music. (Sadly they want another one for Kwanzaa.)

Chanukah List: item one (gelt)

According to my calendar, Hanukkah started a couple days ago and goes to the 1st. What’s a celebrant to do? Well, if you don’t have your wishes documented by now you may be out of latkes!

Your Hanukkah list should exceed your Christmas list eight-fold, we are told. So let’s get the dolla-dolla-dolla outta the way with Emily Zisman singing “Whoring for Hanukkah” –uh oh, this could be naughty. (It’s not! mischievous at worst!)

You Auto Have a Merry Christmas: hot rods-5

Meshugga Beach Party has also cashed in on the surfer craze in the last ten years. These Bay Area bagels rock instrumentally for the most part. (I like “Go Go Golem” and visualize drag racing through the back ways of Marin County.) But we’re here to race, so please have patience with “Hot Rod Hanukkah,” the titular tune off their 2011 album. It’s slow to start. And to lap. And to finish. It takes eight nights.

Christmas Every day: March (sort of)

March is the favorite time of year for grumbling about whether or not the neighbors will ever take down those Xmas lights. And March is a word in holiday-related songs like Nutcrackers and Toy Soldiers. But i got nothing that says the season of March AND Christmas together.

So let’s stretch a bit. Easter comes around March (sometimes) (there’s an equinox and there’s a full moon in there somewhere). Since both holidays involve ol’ JC, let’s see if there’s a song or two mixing them up.

Oh yes–recklessly scrambling children’s sensibilities in order to corner a song niche no one else has attempted, Nooshi the Balloon Dude pastes Easter subject lyrics onto traditional Christmas songs. The worst/most imaginative entries include “Out in the Front Yard” and “We Three Bunnies.” Sounds like someone got a rhythm machine and a prescription to quaaludes for Christmas.

Oh, let’s go one more time… The Mini Lalaloopsy Littles sing “Easter Don’t be Late” to the tune of that Alvin hit, but they don’t seem to love the humor of parody, or the candy-strewn Resurrection.

The inimitable Harvey Fierstein plays it broad as the mercantile Easter Bunny to Elmo and his reindeer friend in an elderly Sesame Street bit “Give Your Friend an Easter Egg for Christmas.” Elementary jazz hands, kids!