Christmas Countdown: 2 measurements

Melissa Sanley has found a “Christmas Recipe,” but–as you might expect from cheesy pop music–it’s a Kindergarten teacher’s list: 2 Cups of Joy; A pinch of Cinnamon; A lot of Smiles… and more. Hoo boy.

Ivor Biggun plays a disgruntled mall Santa who must withstand a gallon or two of bodily fluids evacuated onto their laps. No wonder “Christmas Makes Me Spew.” Music hall shenanigans.

White teen rapper Dripz gets his scoff on with “Christmas is Overrated.” Queueing up in 2°c is just the beginning of his complaint list.

Hey there, weather lady, begins ZuCo in the jazzy R+B plea “Save a Little Snow for Christmas.” An inch or two Thanksgiving Day isn’t enough. White Christmas, got it?

Transitioning off the interstate onto the two-lane road is how you know you’re into a “Hometown Christmas.” That and Allie Aro’s nasal country octave rolling.

Interesting rap from DJ Zenas celebrates all the quirks of Christmas: Cousin ain’t actin a foo’ yet On the floor doin my two step. “For the Holidayz” offers R+B glee, see?

More out of the house, travel guide Nick Lawrence takes us to a “Merry Christmas from San Antone.” Mashed country (blues, boogie woogie, mariachi) offers to go riverwalking… Or two step out to the hill country. Whatever gets you there, dawg.

R+B pop from Sydeajah offers “Dance with Me (This Christmas).” Not much of a dance rhythm, but she’ll work it out: We can two step from west to east, Just Dance with me.

One for the money, two for the show, run run Rudolph don’t be slow, goes the boogie woogie of Lenne Brothers Band in the oh baby “Teddy Boy Season’s Greetings.” Boot scootin’ fun.

Christmas Countdown: 2 in media

Weird with a word (or two), Brad Clayton dissolves reality in the piano bar ballad “Christmas in Detroit.” He’s a one-way ticket, he’s a two-way radio, and he saw ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ for the third time that day. Finger snaps to his talent.

Slap happy (or losing it?), The Christmas Workshop Band call on you to sing along, sing that song, Sing a song or two. Random lyrics, incessant repetition, hard scat… “Christmas Tree Carol” is a test of sanity. Will you pass?

Determined to get you to “Smile for Christmas,” Tommi Rose counsels: I know this year’s been tough on you, But you came out strong–So sing along To a Christmas song or two. Swinging pop, with a dash o’ country.

The Option knows when it’s “Christmas Time.” That’s when you watch ‘Home Alone.’ And if it’s not apparent, Watching Kevin, ‘Home Alone 2‘ should do it. Overlapping pop chaos.

Leaning into the smolder, Cade Hoppe wants you to be “Home for the Holidays.” He also suggest: Let’s watch ‘Home Alone 2’ on your couch. That’s after he asked about watching the first one, twice.

Sad and lonely, HAVR has a “Quiet Christmas.” Slow pop details all the lacks: No Die Hard 2 on ITV. And that’s the way it wasn’t. Without you.

A fun insider’s tour of Middle Tennessee, The Young Nashvillians take us with light (violin heavy) pop to “Christmas Vacation Time.” Place-name dropping competes with the harmonies; Channel Two says ‘scattered flurries’–but it’ll all be okay.

Christmas Countdown: 2 animals

Manger mammals didn’t go two-by-two, but other critters appear paired here.

[Plant sidebar: Federico Ramplona has happy electronica to spread out: Plenty room to spare A Christmas tree or two will be enough to “Decorate.” Salsa backbeat, humph.]

Look out! a saccharine sweet love song slipped in right here! Gemma Nicole does the plain piano lounge-bar pop to get across “Our First Christmas” in which was just us two turtle doves. Aww!

More? Like two turtle doves We’ll sit perfect together, judges Meeks in the steady beat of R+B in “Mistletoe for You.” Lots of mmmms in the lyrics.

Yeah, this is a thing. Two turtle doves, they call us, according to Ziki Hexum with some Motown pop in the swinging “This Christmas Kiss.”

Shantel Sole’ is waiting on her sweetie, wondering what you’re bringing–A turtle dove or two? Tangled R+B dreams of “Holidays with You.”

E8 Profilensemble warn about “Drunk Drivin’ Christmas.” See, leaving Chicago they hit and run a deer… Then the second deer appeared. Howling garage pop that gets you to Idaho, but Santa knows when you’re naughty…

Brandi Ediss was alone last Christmas, but “This Christmas Day” is different:
I’ve got a couch now! I’ve got two cats now! Except, maybe that’s not entirely true. Oh well, sprightly alt-pop.

In “A Gothic ChristmasSanta’s gonna wear a black vest… and slay a dragon or two. Lite metal rock sure is purdy. Within Temptation scores.

Christmas Countdown: 2 people

No, no, no. Not smashing the romantic button here. Sometimes it’s two different people in one song. Take a feature…

For example Matt Ouimet realizes The time is near For two best friends And holiday beer in the over-orchestrated kid(?)song “Christmas Wouldn’t be Christmas Without You.” Watch out for the killer ending.

Also counting family members Wes Borne raps about how I got the whole team and they thick as thieves: Got a good girl with a faithful heart, Two big bros and a brand new niece And parents. Guess that’s more than two total, but “Mistletoe” is party rapping! ‘Suplifting.

Also big with family is Santa Claus. He don’t come around no more in Wild Earp’s rockabilly “Cynical Christmas.” Scandalous? Father Christmas, he don’t come around no more; He’s got two kids in Nashville, he’s got one in Singapore And he don’t pay no alimony and he don’t pay no child support.

Not as crowded is “This Christmas” with Rubber Lightning. This island beat pop worries, Another year unlike any other I thought we’d see a sister or a brother or two. But it hopes.

Sometimes, we slip in the overly sentimental, though. Becca Steiner reminisces about two young faces standing in front of me giggling, wondering if THAT is “The Tree” for Christmas. Generations pass. Tinkly pop that does tug at the pacemaker wires.

Then there’s the righteous. Two little people look up from their beds to wonder all about the mythical elements, including “Where Christmas Goes.” That is, after the 25th. Turns out it never did, according to Sawyer Brown. Slow dance (sorta) country.

Let’s decipher some James Brown. He he sing-talks, Not only to you, to God, number one, To you number two–he means two entities, yeah? “Let’s Make This Christmas Mean Something This Year” may have more than one meaning. Soul, baby.

Sharks Teeth get Dada with their “Marxist Christmas.” Grungey rock that pits Two masters of flesh  ‘gainst one another: Jesus and Karl Marx. Not sure who comes out on top. It’s a glorious mess.

Gotta hand it to E. Quipped (feat. Cutright) who masterminded the rap battle “Mcclane vs. McCallister.” With ‘Grinch’-y narration and snarky one-upmanship, these two Christmas legends have at it. The outcome may be unclear in this song, but compare box office totes, my peeps, and you may be surprised.

The two devils in “Hi My Name is Kevin” is a whole ‘nother rap ’bout that movie, wherein The Wet Bandits are the pair. Here they clearly don’t compare, but despair, in need of repair… something something… derriere.

Ballad time from Brendon Dalton and the 1740 Boys Choir, again. During the final hunt of the Urak-Hai for the Halflings, Merry and Pippin, it’s “Christmas for the Ents.” In the aftermath If you should find a halfling (or two) Pick ′em up and sing a song. Great fun.

Even though “There’s No Christmas in Hell,” Bnny Rbbt uses high-pitched pop to point out all the signs of the holidays: Every snow globe′s magic scene Holds two ice skater figurines, f’r example.

Christmas Countdown: 2 days/nights, hours, minutes

One theory during the pandemic was to “Cancel Christmas,” We could have two in 2021, at last so says Averi Quinn with some dandy rock riffs.

Jolly in his BLUE ALERT Young Respect enjoys his parents’ divorce: Two Christmas’ cuz I have split parents. But “Mommy Milk ‘n’ Cookies” is more about the sex than the swag. That’s a rap.

I know what you’re thinking, it’s just two days How bored can you really be? reasons the Jewish chanteuse Jordana Lilly (somehow calculating Xmas as Eve+Day) in the hilariously ironic “Xmas FOMO.” She swivels from murderous Santa to hunky Hasidic, so it all winds up just fine.

Singing about two holidays (okay, nine days total), Starry Mossbridge gets nearly bluesy with his pop “A Jewish Christmas.” With the right connections, the protagonist made bank, though he does admit these two will always collide. A sad but satisfying salute.

OneRepublic is coming home, finally … I missed Thanksgiving, missed a birthday or two. But one can only stand so many “Christmas Without You.” Blues pop.

Ever mindful of the countdown, Willie Dinardo & The Corporates begin “Piffmas EveChristmas Eve is two days away. But this silly dance/pop is all about the blunt, the bong, the smoke. Under the influence.

Also counting, Barnaby Bright wants to extinguish that “Star-Crossed Christmas.” Just a night or two until You’re sleeping next to me, they hope via pop music.

Such proximity can lead to panic. In the two days until then I don’t know what the hell I′m supposed to do, admits Sad House Guest with groovy mandolin rock/pop in their angsty “Moscow Mules.” They’re drinking to live, not living to drink.

Terri Clark forbears the rough holiday times [A two day drive, stuck inside with you singing in my car], but she aw-shucks countrifies her sentiment in the rollicking “Merry Christmas (Wherever in the World You Are).”

My family is two time zones away, groans Harvey Danger in the masterful psychedelic rock “Sometimes You Have to Work on Christmas.” You need to hear this one.

Christmas is Coming (They Say),” but can you really wait/sleep ’til then? You wake up at midnight, then one, then you wake up and it′s only quarter to 2 a.m.Bouncy pop from Becca Steiner is more than kidsong, but can be served to all ages.

Get up now, time to go, No we don’t leave until two begins the misty rap of No More Saul in the scary “Christmas Nostalgia.” Childhood was the worst, right?

Fralphie Jenkins paints you a picture in the electronic slow dance of “2 A.M. Christmas Eve.” It’s a gutter-level family portrait of modern-age depravity. Dude, you’re drowning out the mouse-stirring.

That early can be a scary moment. Especially with the garage rock contrast of holiday and loss. Two A.M. on Christmas Eve You rejoice with angels as I grieve, moans Manic Drive in “December Mourning.” Harsh, though melodic.

What makes a Xmas presenter an “Indian Giver“? (yeah, that’s racist) According to Squirrel Nut Zippers Two hours later he wants it back! Rockabilly blues of the festive variety.

The Lost Connection tell a fabulous tale of a mysterious visitor and mysterious gift on Christmas Eve. How mysterious? I stood in silence for a minute or two, in response to it. “If Only (Pigs Could Fly at Christmas)” is prog rock, though with a bit too much sinister harmony. Still, props.

The Bingle Jells (feat. Andrew LLoyd Baughman) tune up the brass to jazz up the lite rock of “Latchkey Kid at Christmas.” How tough did that get? Mom left a note on the fridge It says ‘Dinner′s on the top shelf, heat it for 2 minutes I’ll see you later, working late tonight’. Sigh.

Christmas Countdown: 2 years, months, weeks

Time to double down on the count. The number two is so primary, every other Christmas song mentions it. We’ll wend our way through the options to see if we can score pure silver

Having fun with some old friends, Some I’ve known since I was two, American Authors pulls out all the cheese to pop perform “Christmas Karaoke.” No irony here.

Having grief without friends and family, Paul Rhea (feat. Susan Shewbridge) sing folk about how “Christmas Just Ain’t Christmas Anymore.” We’ve nearly starved for two long barren years after some cold and heartless war. Metaphor? Or is this the perennial question of how ANYONE can have joy? Whew.

MBG BadBoy busts the rhyme slowly for a lonely “Christmas.” Two years now I’ve been looking for a girlfriend, he slurs. So that’s not a great holiday.

Also sad, Checklist laments that sometime, 2 years before You passed me by, though I was a pretty good boy. What follows, in metal toned rock earnestness, is a description of what our forlorn one found under the tree. “Next Year for Sure.” they conclude.

Snidely, Brato Useba charms with “The Proper Christmas Spirit,” which includes starting too early, buying crap, and silly emergencies [Shit we forgot to get something for your sister in law, Didn’t she have a baby two years ago in March?]. Symphonic pop that pleases.

After a tantrum by a “Pouty Kid (I See No Reason for the Season)” over disappointing gifts–Two years more the wiser, brother starts to speak up to set him straight. What results is a haunting, melodic philosophic dissertation about sucking it up from The Ornaments of Bowling Green. Nihilism ahoy.

Blue Alert! Shotgun Soul slow R+B/raps the cynical “It’s Christmas,” as in It’s fuckin’ Christmas like two months a year. Lots of cultural name-dropping to make hot-button points, but it’s millennial mopiness. Great for the disenfranchised.

Pissing and moaning, Thrice a Chuckle grunge pops how it’s “Too Soon for Christmas.” How too soon? It’s still two months away. Hey, that’s the holiday season! So, it’s ninety degrees outside! How do the Australians do it?!

Collin Derrick wants you to “Take Me South for Christmas.” The parameters? Just give me an ocean view for a week or two, baby–This Christmas. Ukulele pop happiness.

The suicide-by-chop tree in the woods is begging passersby to “Take Me Home for Christmas.” Aubryn makes scary lines like Let me be your family For a week or two pretty with her beer barrel slow folk pop.

Circling the drain, Currier describes a depressed one: suffering, desperate, immobile [Haven’t left this spot for nearly two weeks]. “How About Another Rum and Coke (Merry X-mas)” is glacial garage, slo-mo tragedy.

Dandy country rock from Cammi Rockey exposes “Rudolph’s True Glow“–he’s a lush! A menu of alcoholic beverages details how the lead-dear got completely lit. Two weeks after Christmas Rudolph’s senses had come back and couldn’t remember a thing. Don’t tell the kids.

Christmas Countdown: 3 else

God heavens, what else is there three of for Xmas?!

Well, you may have heard of ships. Apparently seeing them from Bethlehem was a show of faith because no body of water is visible from there. Or they were camels under the magi. Nobody much spoofs this hymn, so it’s time for the ol’ blog-meister to dip into his well of wits and share The North Pole Fisherman’s Association’s take:” “I Saw Three Fish.”

With insistent alt rock, Mark Soileau has got to get to his love “This Christmas (Right Now).” I knock three times, nervously waiting… guess what happens next?

Gabby B flaunts it in her power pop “Christmas Day.” Gingerbread cookies and a glass of milk–Stuff my stockings, I might hidе some; One’s for Santa, Three for me. Where’d those stuffed cookies go?

Always room for a rocker that begins Christmas trees are eating the pavement… but when Dionysos continues with I fall in love With three four ankles it have to include “Nicholsong” even with the uncertainty of its holidayishness.

More surrealism from Poncho Boy (feat. Money Mop), rapping Got three bands with the watch so I call it ice cream in a seasonal safari “A Very Poncho Christmas.” Say what?

Counting her blessings in the country strummer “Still Christmas in Nashville” Lori McKenna wishes God bless the server at the meat and three The smile on her face better than mac and cheese. Good on ya. Bless you back. (What’s a meat and three?)

Also counting, the kid of the song give a beggar “Three Little Pennies” in the Doug Stone country tear jerker. After a fake out the kid gets his bike for Xmas. Karma or Christ?

Back to Brendan Dalton with a piano bar ballad to Boromir’s treacherous tragedy in ‘Fellowship of the Ring.’ “A Merryless Christmas” is Pippin singing about losing his bestie as that bad Rohan king gets 3 arrows in his chest (and still fights!). (Merry adds he doesn’t want his holidays Pippin-less.) This is as cool as it gets for nerds.

Vampire Christmas” is a metaphor for a modern man partier who is sucked dry by the culture. I guess. In the midst of this pop complaint comes Johnny Marsh’s breathless rap about how Nothing truly nothing really really ever lasts forever It kinda feels like living through a three ring fucking circus. Pithy poetry.

Bugged by modern times, Amy Grant soft pops “I Need a Silent Night.” Didn’t used to–there was a time Where people stayed home wishing for snow, Watching three channels on their TV; Look at us now.

Feeling like hell, Beat Happening plays kindergarten instruments for his “Christmas” song. He had sex three times on Christmas resulting in boredom and depression. Experimental pop, but, dude, i think you’re doing it wrong.

See, R J Word knows For “The First Three Hours of Christmas” Our parents aren’t gonna miss us (No)… so they can mess around. R+B/pop seduction.

Well, Meghan Tulles is so melancholic i can’t tell if the “Three Christmases” she spent with the addressed are the only, the last, or the first of a forever thing. Odd semi-country pop ballad.

Fine folk from Dave Almond, but he’s been sniffing pine needles or something, because beneath this tree If you look real close There’s two or three there of you and me in “(A World of) Tiny Lights.” Oooh.

Reeny Smith also waffles with fine piano jazz pop, telling “Dear Santa” she don’t really need nothing. Well, Hoping for a kiss or three, but no worries.

Objectophilia may be the way to go then. Henef claims: This song was made for you Singing those 3 words, I Love You, “Christmas Tree.” Alt pop perversity. The best kind.

Tiffany Houghton and Jay Alan get cozy skipping the big Xmas party [Sleigh bells ringing, oh wait that’s my phone–3 missed calls but we’re still at home] to be alone together and discover how 00you look “Better Without a Sweater.” Sultry pop.

Earlier in the relationship Viceboy asks you to Wear that sweater, and, also, Hi, do you wanna put up a tree with me; I have some ornaments from last year and and a star or three. This flirtatious awkward pop makes for a winning “Snowcity.”

Moving faster, Chloe Bee asks Let’s watch a movie or two or three And hang lights up from all the walls. “Snow Day” takes the pop ‘ship and runs with it.

Without the snow? Nothing good! “The No Snow Blues” pits Bob Sellon’s preparation [Got a new pair of boots, Got some sun screen for my nose, I got three pairs of socks on] against the dry, dry slopes. It’s a Christmas tragedy.

Hawksley Workman finishes up and wrangles “3 Generations” while they’re altogether in one house for a photographic opportunity. Great washtub jazzy pop. Practically Dixieland. Love it.

Christmas Countdown: 3 wishes/cheers/gifts/beers/ghosts

Three wishes are big about this time of the year. Tony Yazbeck and Patti Lupone duet “Three Wishes for Christmas” from the B’way musical ‘Gypsy.’ It’s for love, but Broadway show love.

Unable to afford a menorah, Dolly Parton offers “Three Candles” to make three wishes for Christmas [‘Cuz wishes do come true]. It’s Dolly.

Anne Murray wishes for “Christmas Wishes.” Then she country/pop demurs: I’d only ask for three. But they are the universe changing kind.

Twin League may be a bit over enthusiastic wishing Ho! Ho! Ho! Three cheers for Santa! with shouting and pop singing in the slightly catchy “Santa’s Sleigh.”

Ups and downs in Matthew McLaughlin’s “Chestnuts.” Christmas is a rollercoaster; Three cheers for the up and over… but that depends if you’re with him, Darlene. Otherwise, it’s alt rock all the way.

Stellar Kart gets less punk and more traditional with “Punk the Halls.” Three cheers for Christmas: Hey, hey, hey and a ho, ho, ho they sing, rather than wail.

Cheers? Beers! King Kendall seeks the perfect “Christmas Jam,” but seems to rap about whatever’s in front of him: Lookin outside tryina′ see reign deer; While Ty knockin’ back 3 beers (he drunk) And Mari sheds a tear (yup). Day inna random life.

I’ll Never Drink with Santa Again” is Fabby Claus doing his drunk Elvis AND his drunk rockabilly smush mouth. It starts with One and one and one is three. Then it keeps going. Good stuff.

Backroom Stereo preferred the isolation of the Pandemic. In “I Hate the Snow” he rocks any excuse he can not to go out. Like snow! But I’ll walk to the pub, sit by the fire and have a beer or two, or maybe even three. Then snow’s not so bad.

With a better excuse, Secret Army punks out the pain when “Fired in Christmas.” Running into his mates, however, I order a beer, then two, then three and I start to feel alright. He even has a good night. But, the next morning….

Beers? Gifts! Boy bands are adorable when their lyrics make them out spoiled babies. Varsity Fanclub’s “It’s Christmas Again” chortles: Presents underneath the tree. One for you and three for me. The poppest of pop.

And… when Santa arrives… Our man of mystery bears a gift or three, according to the American rock of Jody Whitesides in “We’d Like to Wish You.” Yeah!

Solomon Burke know you want “Presents for Christmas.” In the best of R+B, he allows that all of you want Maybe one, two, or three toys. He’s on to something.

Maurice Fresh (feat. Shane Cashmere) raps about keeping the Christmas spirit with I told Santa I want 3 cars. “Big Sale” is rattatat rapping about making big.

A little Jerry Lee Lewis styling (welcome!) from Larson Lee details all the Christmas movie cliches that WON’T keep him from getting to his loved one, including Not even three ghosts Who showed Scrooge his grave Could scare me off this Christmas Day. “It’s No Christmas“without you!

Christmas Countdown: 3 degrees

Measuring is not the same as counting. It’s more like multiplying.

From the album Lipstick II Lipstick Generation absolutely rocks the pop with “Christmastime Machine.” This sci fi conceit may not save Christmas, you’ll have to stay tuned for Lipstick III. I’m in line, like right now!

Speaking of sequels, Monty Python’s “Christmas in Heaven” promises ‘The Sound of Music’ and ‘Jaws I, II, and III.’ A samba classic.

During an “Acid Christmas” 6radley observes We are all curled up by the fire Watching The Santa Clause 3 Then maybe Polar Express, Jingle All the Way, Muppets Christmas Carol… Keep going till we fall asleep… Light pop, believe it or not.

Not sure if he’s coming home from the military or prison, but he’ll be “Covered in Love” when he arrives from Flight number three to Minneapolis in Wonderstate’s middle of the road pop nothingsomuch song.

Bros lists of the Christmas things “These Things Comfort Me.” Three feet of snow makes the list. Peppy pop/rock. I mean, fun times, with clapping and falsetto.

Sassydee feels three feet small with all the mishaps of Christmas. But pop tunes entitled “Mistletoe” gotta end well, right?

I heard you got three feet of snow; and all we got here is rain, moans Tom Odell in the energetic rock-pop “Spending All My Christmas With You (Next Year).”

Paul the Messenger honors the fam and psalms with toasts: three times! “Xmas” is Carib rock and you’ll need a full glass nearby.

Not as devoted, Radar & Satellite sing Christmas time is here, Time to see people you see twice a year–Or maybe three times if Easter counts . “Party Foul” is not exactly irreverent, but the bass line is fresh. Rock on.

Crushing distantly, Juliet Lyons confides Three towns over There′s someone who’s on my list, then torch sings “Got That Twinkle.” Wishes, dreams, heart noises… it’s all here in fantasy pop music land.

After Tolkien’s trilogy, it’s a “Third Age Xmas (War Ain’t Over),” the curtain call for the survivors of LOTR from Brendan Dalton & The 1740 Boys Choir. This folk rocker springboards off ‘War is Over’–but goes so much further. The end.

Set to someone else’s music “Last Xmas” raps out another story of confusion: I learned a lot 3rd degree, burned a lot…. Tiarre T.P. keeps us guessing.

Tea Fannie frames her “Jingle Bells” with tales of her life, including not liking the cold cold three degrees temperatures. Sultry rap.

Smarmy country pop commands you to “Pick Out a Christmas Tree.” Dan + Shay direct you to go to Top shelf in aisle three and you always do what they sing, don’t you?

The Grinch had a threefold growth that get s a few allusive mentions. I love… watching the Grinch’s heart Grow three sizes, admits Abby Williams before launching into a torchy easy listening ode about being “Not Excited for Christmas.” (Hint: something to do with loneliness.)

Ryley Michael relates a visit from a Christmas ghost and Rudolph made his heart grow three sizes. “20/20 Christmas” is another rap adventure of hope.

The real elixir to all this solitude is Emerson Brophy, who has a real hate-on for the subject of his song: Being a Grinch is not my style, But my heart shrinks three sizes, Every time I see you smile. Yet, no one should be “Alone on Christmas.” So, good thought? Maybe, stay tuned.

Christmas Countdown: 3 and down, or up

Frozen Black Rose follows four mooks in a nudie bar with 3, 2, 1 days until Christmas Eve in the folk-pop “Merry (Les Miserables) Christmas.” It’s a testament to how awful we all are. Enjoy!

When conducting the Quaddy Junior Chuoir one must count: we go after three, yeah, Yeah, a one a two a one a two a one a two a one two three–Its Christmas! So, “Christmas Time, Wishing You a Very Merry Christmas” by Tim Johnson -Hull becomes staccato, repetitive, a marching tune of pop music. But, they’re on beat.

Uncertainly, Wapgang (feat. Carter Morrissette) counts through the rounds of “How the Grinch Copped Christmas” to keep the beat. Doesn’t work. Strange experimental song results.

Speaking of experimental… John David Lees sets Santa to flying, and SAILING [Racing out across the sea Ships drift by: One two three] to get the presents distributed. “Going to be Fine This Christmas Time” may be sampling ‘I Saw Three Ships’ or it may just be tweaking. Cool.

Antithetically, “X-Mas in Hell” by Sixx AM chronicles a diarist giving three reasons for writing in a diary, naked, under a Christmas tree, ODing. Spoken over metal.

Lowdy (feat. Shin Bia, Emily Sung, Khai & Zensang) is counting blessings: One time for the family, Two times for the friends, Three times for the people that always got your back no matter what you’re going Through. “Dear Christmas” is easy listening rap, though. Messy.

McKenna Noh can’t wait for your flight to arrive, so she prettily pop counts while Watching every snowflake falling like One, two, three (Two, three) in “Eve.”

Full of love and happiness, Patrick Vargas announces it’s “Christmas Time” 1, 2, 3, go! Rocking pop with a nice backbeat.

Shy Boyz are willing to share “The Meaning of Christmas.” Stand back… I know the meaning of Christmas now, Here we go, you ready guys, 3, 2, 1… blast off! Don’t let this R+B pop fool you, the meaning is actually

The kid telling the tale of “Selfie With Santa” is lying in wait Xmas night. At the right moment he’ll ambush and say, Well on the count of three give me that magic smile. Big band fluffiness.

As a charming bridge in “The Day After Halloween (It’s Christmas Again)” Hidden Horizon stops rocking to yell out Nice sled brother, Let’s go to the hill, 1 2 3 Go. Look out below! Worth it to include this gem.

Gonna put some ornaments on the tree, And at the count of three, We gonna see the lighting, sings Christafari in a fine Reggae rendition of “Deck the Halls.” Ya, mon.

Vinny the Comb calls on us to “Recycle Christmas” tongue in cheek. He rocks on sending back the cards, watering down the whiskey to redrink, and We’ll gather up all Frosty’s balls Stack them one two three.