Merry Mistletoe: Ryan, Brooks/Dunn, Williams Band

Mistletoe is fun! Like bluegrass! Derek Ryan proves it with “Beneath the Mistletoe!” Sing along with the ho-ho-hos!

But lots of mistletoe songs are moodily joyous, read country/western.

Brooks and Dunn belt out the ‘dear’ in “Hangin’ ’round the Mistletoe.” But they just want you to desire responsibly.

For my mistletoe, Luke Williams Band delivers better on the honky tonk with “Mistletoe Baby.” Twangs it to the nearly indecipherable, sweetens it to the legal limit.

Merry Mistletoe: who huh

Most youtube song amateurs are mere children giggling and emulating rap stars. (The funny ones are way too brief.)

A few have the equipment, at least materially, to deliver a song.

Austin Jasay sings out of his range about “Mistletoe.” With his shirt and tie, politeness, and blue hair he’s easy to dismiss. But his song has range and flirts with depth.

Hannah J shows considerable range and intensity that at times reveals emotional fun (the Frosty metaphor) with her “Under the Mistletoe.” Grunge this up a bit with a back up bass and watch out. Sign off after the song, unless you like peeping  in on the lives of underage girls being girls.

Merry Mistletoe: who now

Some you tube artists break out and score millions of views. Most don’t. Doesn’t mean they don’t have passion, verve, rhythm. Usually they do have a crowded crooked bedroom, poor sound, and an itty bitty range of talent.

Ann Wave sings her “Mistletoe” warning Santa not to bring presents (she just wants the right kissing). And she leans into it, overcompensating for the blonde hair.

Thanecha, on the other hand, sets her shot in the decorated front room (and name drops the tree), but seems to be reading off her lyrics and chords from her notes. Regardless, she has slightly more sense of humor and a raw talented voice (singing–her speaking voice grates) that overpowers for the rented guitar. Her “Mistletoe” weeps gladly.

Merry Mistletoe: Aretha, Williams, etc.

The party’s started! But some of you wallflowers need pointers.

Aretha’s got you! “Kissing by the Mistletoe” lays it out, complete with mwah! sounds. Some tortured rhyming, but dig that declamatory early ’60s rock!

What this song needs is a Latin beat. Joe Williams sets the salsa to medium/hot with his 9th grade teacher explanations with his “Kissing by the Mistletoe.”

But I’m going to play with some amateurs, so let’s start with semi-pro Catherine Lorentzen doing her sultry home school spin on this seductive song with the fam.

Merry Mistletoe: harry potter

While we’re upping with people, Harry Potter! That cheers everyone up, right?

Pennsylvanian besties formed a band (The Moaning Myrtles) out of high school finding they were just wild about Harry. Here’s their take on those imaginary critters infesting the mistletoe Luna claims she can see (and ruining moments between Harry and Cho). So, obvi: “Nargles in the Mistletoe.” Is it love yet?

Merry Mistletoe: kids

We’ve been riding the bummer bus to down town the past few postings. Let’s jolly it up with cute kids singing what adults told them to sing– adorable!

Some conglomerate of a couple under-appreciated band-moms called Children Love to Sing put together “I’m Standing Under the Mistletoe.” Get ready to Awww!

Merry Mistletoe: Watson, KLAQ

(By my account this is blog post #500)

Again, mistletoe as symbol. This time it’s me and you, angry lover, just like “Mistletoe on Death Row.” Dale Watson johnny cashes this mood piece from an actual movie ‘Angels Sing.’ I say actual movie cause it stars Harry Connick Jr and Connie Britton. But I ain’t never heared of it.

El Paso’s KLAQ morning show with Somebody and Whasisname have their share of holiday ha-has, including a more appropriate: “Christmas on Death Row” sung by The Uninvited (?) which also mentions mistletoe. Strap in, offenders, it’s naughty.

Merry Mistletoe: Farley Flower Band

While botanically speaking, take a minute for a cut from an album about flowers. Let me say that again: every song is about a flower! Tulips! Orchids! Mulberries! Rhodo-frickin-dendrons! Self publishing never smelled so good! The Farley Flower Band need a bouquet! But hearken to “The Best Mistletoe Song Ever Made” first. Beware–these guys tell it like it is!