At this point, the year Twenty Twenty-five is the future, so the spirit of Xmas then, as per Holiday Roger’s faboo “Christmas Spirits,” tells us Cookies are made of lasers, Christmas lasts forever, Santa is president, and Better reindeer are invented. Let’s go! Electronic comedy pop.
Category: electronic
Christmas Countdown: 1,000,000?
Is the exaggeration of a million ever ironic?
A million candy canes might be twirled when the cast of Pokemon sings “I’m Giving Santa a Pikachu for Christmas.” Hoo boy.
A thirty-year-old fruitcake might last a million years, so “The Same Christmas Cake” gets the Gregorian chant from Arrogant Worms.
That broken Rudolph display may be in about a million pieces, but Carson Station’s hangover after “Drinking on Christmas” will telescope that on down to nuttin.
The Hit Metres apply hyperbole with their electronic oddity “There are a Million Songs about Christmas.” But they do it lickety split. (Less successfully, Corey Horn sings several of the songs himself while protesting from within “A Million Christmas Dreams.” Pop falderal.)
Christmas Countdown: ∞
It’s getting closer to Christmas. Well, it’s always getting closer to Christmas. The day after Christmas is revolving around to the next Christmas. The numbers matter. Feel free to visit The Christmas Clock to check on that.
What are the numbers for Christmas? Well, twelve… twenty-five… erm, one?
Surely there are more.
From the top…
The “Infinite Christmas” song from Fruber is neither ordinal nor cardinal, but like Shari Lewis’s Lamb Chop’s ‘The Song That Never Ends’, loops endlessly. It is a circle of Hell, with tidy vocalization. I’ll attempt some repetitive Xmas music later and star this.
Dan Collins gets poet-troubadour with “Christmas Tree Infinity,” a piano bar rocker of lost perspective. Brrr.
Playing the odds, Ryan Hill posits that given enough resources an “Infinite Monkey Christmas” (plus infinite typewriters) will result in–if not Shakespeare’s corpus–a merry Christmas. Fun and fizzy unplugged rock.
“Waves of Infinite Christmas” from Ireworks may not give us mathematical direction either, but this experimental ‘music’ does seem to take a while. Sing along.
Name Eight, again
Name Five
The back four reindeer tend to disappear into the pack. Is Comet just a flash in the pan?
The Tim Allen contributions to Xmas tend to wander off base with repetition, So ‘The Santa Clause II’ isn’t so terrible as it might be. The animatronic reindeer attempt to steal scenes, ‘cuz the Toolmaster is mostly straight man. SMC tries to jazz up the comic routine of the overindulgent candy-vore by DJ mishing up the dialogue with electronica. “Comet” is party wallpaper with an edge.
X-claim: oh my god [slight BLUE ALERT]
Many of these interjections are softened forms of taking the Lord’s name in vain. (In vanity, which means you done cussed for your own selfish ends, not for the prayer’s worth of it.)
Family of the Year get behind “OMG It’s Christmas” with a soft rock/pop slurry of fun. They believe.
Speaking of belief–Ty Hunter’s “Oh My God” is that country music wordplay thing that’s the thinking bubba’s headscratcher. It’s pithy and punny and pious. And a waltz!
Less produced, more devout: “Oh My God It’s Christmas” by Randolph Steed and his trusty banjo in his den.
Brendan Ashton gets quieter and more sardonic with his hipster poem “Oh My God It’s Christmas Again.” Plenty of talent un Der that reindeer onesie.
The Gamer of Blood War (Ellis) has cobbled together a little sump’n sump’n of a song entitled “Oh My God It’s Christmas.” This was inspired by a zombie shooting vid-game, and it gets a little BLUE (quite a few songs exclaim ‘Oh -[expetive deleted] – it’s Chrismuzz!’ which have already floated to the top of the blog before now but attain goodness not by repetition). Electronica.
Waiting for Weird
It doesn’t feel like any other time of anticipation: not for taking your MCATs, not for getting pulled over, not for losing your virginity… waiting for Xmas is a uniquely great expectation. So let’s explore the underrepresented in music.
A Christmas musical so odd MST3K spoofed it, ‘Christmas That Almost Wasn’t’ ends with the song “Nothing to Do But Wait,” wherein shopkeeper Sam (Paul Tripp) with Santa hold their breaths hoping the children will save the holiday. Showtune anger. I guess. YOU describe it then.
Hard banging garage whispering “Can’t Hardly Wait” weirds me out. Soft or hard? Good or bad? BIG HIT, help me understand.
Proper sitar psychedlia from Dimentia 13 melts your apprehension into a world without time. “Christmas Comes to Those Who Wait” must be consumed in a neutral-colored place of comfort with friends near by.
Late addition recommended from Pete the Elf: the 1958 kookiest entry from Tommy Christy “All are Waiting for Christmas.” The skinny and fat ones. too. AKA ‘The Christmas “Name” Song,’ ‘cuz he calls the kids names… For kidsong that’s really yikes!
Electronic psychedelia volleys the oddity into your court. Brad & Barry make “I Can’t Wait for Christmas Time” feel like i can’t wait for the ketamine to kick in. Whoa.
Mall World: pedo
Tell me it’s not so! Mall Santa’s touching!!
No Assumption metalicizes the pedophilic tendencies of the giving oldster with their “Mall Santa.” They’ll none of it.
The Buglies dramatize that nasty fiend with booming laughter in “Santa’s Lap Dance.” Excuse me while i go wash. Garage atonal porn.
Not exactly forgivin’, but appreciative, Lil Poverty Angels unload their word jazz electronic rap on “Santa’s a Dirty Old Man.”
Mall World: creep
How bad can mall Santa be? Let’s start at the bottom.
G-Zeus X has a liltin’ folk pop ballad about the “Mall Santa” who wants to come over. But he’s creepin’ me out. What to do?
Cheetah Dave takes a closer look at the 1$ version in his “Outlet Mall Santa.” One eye, but many smells. Fun percussive garage family rock.
Sex Lights
Those little light bulbs on a string for Jesus sure get me in a frisky mood. Baby.
Cody Joe Hodges country twists all the holiday catchphrases into double entendres in “Tangled in the Christmas Lights.” Whoa, Nelly, that’s a warm apple cider, that one is.
Julian Primeaux hoots lowly for his mood-setting “Christmas Lights in June.” Jazzy alt that melts in your hand as well as your mouth.
James Kolchaka Superstar somehow commingles those “Beautiful Christmas Lights” with coveting thy neighbor’s wife. Experimental breezy fun. [The BLUE ALERT random electronic rap on this theme is “Christmas Lights” by Nessley, mentioned here as a postscript only. Sheesh!]