Category: big band

If you’re familiar with John Candy and Steve Martin’s ‘Planes, Trains, and Automobiles’ you know all modes of transportation fail around the holidays. In fact, many Christmas songs about taking the train warn about being late.

Sarah Connor begins “Not So Silent Night” all ASMR anticipatory about getting ready. But the family crashes and bangs: Kids complainin’ Santa’s late; Brother stuck on the train… and it rocks on and on about the glorious mess of Advent reality. Cathartic.

Boys get impatient, too. Hudson Taylor power pop sings I’ve got my family and my friends, my lady′s on her way I go to meet her off the train, yeah, but it′s running late–that’s “How I Know It’s Christmas.” Acceptance is the last stage. Or maybe silver lining.

“Get There for Christmas” by Monique De Los Santos · Jex De Castro · Andrew Collins pitches up the frustrations of tardy toot toots with chimey pop music. Whoa-oh-oh-ohoh.

Lala Deaton is diva jazz band hopefully “Wishing on a Snowflake” that you’ll make it home in time for the holidays. I read a telegram today that you might be delayed; But nothing′s gonna hold that train cause Christmas won’t be late. Sultry, though it does suggest a kickline.

Lily Frost gently takes your hand in the light folk pop of “Skating on the River.” It’s all good clean fun.

Sugies gets more serious–romantically–with the pop “Ice Skating Rink.” Could be love.

Frank Luther has serious advice for you silly-heads. “Ice Skating is Nice Skating” he begins with lovely big band orchestration behind. But—

The perfect man is fit and trim. Like when The Big Red guy’s cuttin’ back So he can fit down my chimney stack–Yeah, “Santa’s Got a Six Pack.” Mmm, he’s all that and a bag of gifts. Fine girl rockabilly from Ciera MacKenzie.

The perfect woman brings the six pack And 2 bottles a wine when she drops by. Galactic Junkrod recounts the time “Mary Christmas” (Mrs. Santa?) visited a dumped dupe for a few rounds of holiday cheer. Double entendres ensue. And a version of rockabilly.

Like progressives on the left side 3 drinks in. 6 shots deep; It’s nearly cleared out for the night, soul chants White Lucy from a BLUE ALERT dark place–emotionally and dive-bar-istically. “Xmas on the West Side” is a plea to get back together. Don’t quit your day job.

When “It’s Christmas Time Again” Yay Raven’s family gathers and–ha ha–patience is tested. Smooth R+B celebrates these oddballs, including when the eggnog got spiked And grandpa drinks too much And he drank 6 cups And he drives us round the bend. Don’t let him drive!

Shoe finds a bottle by a tree, so I drank a glass or maybe eight to celebrate Santa(?)’s gift to him. This retro rock with pop country teetering in claims he’s “2 Drunk 4 Xmas.” Don’t argue with him.

We got tunes and chips, six cans of beer drawls out Tsmusicproject. In lieu of celebration, this dearth of Xmas materials allows them to appreciate their own love. With two step fervor they want to dance away these “Christmas Blues.”

Getting funny/funky, Beat Avenger delivers the disco in “White Clawsmas.” I have six small cans that are full of fun juice, he announces. Get his keys!

Larry Costa gets the band big together with the giggly “Six Cups of Egg Nog.” His Sinatra impression ain’t half bad, but the humor of over drinking is Deano all the way. Crassly uproarious.

What else is 100 at Christmas?

100 caps in on the short list of “All I Want” from Kj-52 & Spechouse. Raucous rap that’s just kidding.

100 proof is good enough for RaeLynn in the clever country pop “Jingle Bell Drunk.” Strangely, she thinks she’s got YOU–but still wants to take the edge off with the hard stuff.

A hundred bird baths is only part of the thought that counts in “Christmas at the Zoo” from Jacob Jeffries & Beauty Queen. A remarkably cornball big band concoction, this party brings Xmas to the animals. ‘Bout time!

Are the reindeer on the roof enough to persuade you of the magic that is Xmas?

Take it from me, croons Nick Lowe in “Hooves on the Roof.” Jazzy electronica.

Allie Jo Thomas says it plainly: she believes in Santa ’cause she heard “Reindeer on the Roof.” Sprightly kidsong.

All You Gotta Do is Believe You Got a “Hoof on the Roof.” Believe it or not, The Hooves sing this bombastic big band gospel call to legs.

The stages from sceptic to advocate outline Ideascapes Music with their jazz big band “Reindeer on the Roof.” Twirl, two three. Whee!

Let’s get mean. At this point Christmas is over, and we don’t know why we were so gung ho. I mean, what did we expect, really?

Punk pop from The Earps pees all over the traditions in “I Can’t Wait for Christmas (To be Over).” Slight BLUE ALERT. You know.

Heather Henderson gets ironic big band chanteuse about cat poop and parental insecurity with the luminous “I can’t Wait for Christmas… to be Over.” Give the little lady a hand sanitizer.

Wait, don’t wait–what’s a child to do with Christmas in the neighborhood?

“Don’t Wait ’til the Night Before Christmas” to be good, so went the big band standard from pre-WWII. I enjoy Miss Rose & Her Rhythm Percolators wagging a trumpeted finger atcha. Rosemary Clooney and Nick Clooney have a fun rehearsal tape of this. For good measure, here’s Dick Robertson and His Orchestra setting you straight:

Another oopsie missed date. Did someone hack me?

Keaton Simons seems to like his song “Eyes Light Up at Christmas,” a peppy pop romp that encourages good feelings.

Marlene Dietrich croons “Christmas Lights” on the trees, but they’re candles. Oh, that was a thing. Symphonic mit sotto voce.