TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Time for Another Scotch Pine

When pure evil tragedy strikes around Christmas, what better scapegoat than that thing you spent all day doting on and bejeweling?

In fact, that thing might be a diabolical doorway to demonicry. “Christmas Tree from Hell” reminds us of two important issues: buyer beware, and ‘God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen’ is a scary melody. Listen with the lights on to Bah & The Humbugs.

They hurt me! Kill them all! is Paulette’s “Christmas Trees” message. Talky folk, but oh my.

Metaphorsing metaphors, Bree Lucas compares you to the lack of comparison. “You Couldn’t Compare, Christmas Tree” is front room folk by a powerful talent about a terrible thing that happened.

The emptiness around this time of year coalesces for JJ Voss with “Whiskey, the Tree, and Me.” (As previously posted) it’s scotch o’clock for country rock.

“Six Billion Lights (On the World’s Biggest Christmas Tree)” makes a bummer out of living. Derek A. Dempsey and Nicole Lynch point to each person on the Earth and, in military country pop, allow that we all suffer. So, Christmas. You’re welcome.

Islands plink and doot-doo through “Christmas Tree” with alt folk philosophy… oh, you know what’s coming! Bad stuff (coffins, oppression, misunderstanding).

Orbit emplys some simple rock and not so simple word salad for “A Christmas Carol.” Get a load of the refrain. Damn. Suicide prevention hotline, please.

Okay, not so holidaysical, but “Christmas Tree Bridge” leans on the irony of the awful tragedy of losing a parent with the most family of phrases. Yikes. What sick folk is this?! BLUE ALERT

The Vandals want to kill two birds and “Hang Myself from the Christmas Tree.” Indie folk rock. Get comfy, this is a long one.

Perhaps homicide? “Murder by Christmas Tree” is a short metal ode to how to get away with murder from Santa’s Angry Elves. I don’t like them when they’re angry.

Next? “Bury Me by the Roots of a Christmas Tree” pop punk Agent Pazz. It’s such cute nihilism. BLUE ALERT

Time to give up! Life is too awful. Let’s buy the “Christmas Tree” with Kiki Bohemia and her cheap electronic hypnotic singsongery to show our despair. Bleak, black, blecch.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Stand by Your Tree (alone)

Still missing you! And there’s a Christmas tree here.

Alt folk with Shannon St. Clare is husky warbling. She wonders if you think of her “When You Put up Your Christmas Tree.” And gets in a few digs, too.

It’s not ok when you’re not there “Standing by the Christmas Tree” sounds classier with classic piano and some Irish. Cara Dillon raises the bar despite the platitudes.

Wendell Ferguson gets more clever with “Pining ‘Round the Christmas Tree.” His electric country tickling is punny and hopeful. Go, Wendell.

Come back home! cries D’Lannie so you can be “By the Christmas Tree” with her. It’ll make or break the whole holiday. I presume, ‘cuz it’s electric pop and that’s superficially dramatic.

Ed Mills is missing her–i think she’s dead, Jim. “Sitting by the Christmas Tree” is not always on key, but it’s sincerely sad country.

I get Take me back this time and some other lamentation in this hard folk strummer. But “A Small Gathering Around a Pine Tree” is about broken dreams only known to the stoned poet. Fun mixed media experimentation.

On the verge of not making it, Latka rocks the house (w/some bad ass fiddlin’) “From Under the Christmas Tree.” She could make it, but she’s been found out. Damn her.

Speaking of lost organs, Suzi Miller & The Keynotes admits “I’ll Hang My Heart on a Christmas Tree,” updated with icy jazz by Jeni Fleming. The ’51 band number soars.

No hope for my baby ever to be there, so Sarah Brown relates “My Christmas Tree is Hung with Tears.” Funky soulful blues. Testify.

Baby Jane and The Blenders doowop the 1963 out of “You Trimmed My Tree.” (It was with her broken heart, you cad!) It’s mad, dad.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Lone Leaf

I keep looking at that Christmas tree, and i keep thinking… she’s gone.

King’s to open. Elvis has no feeling of home without her. “Holly Leaves and Christmas Trees” are just dead stuff in a room. Boo hoo.

Chelsea Reed seems to be holding on through the whole thing, but her tone is torch song. “Last Year’s Christmas Tree” is a symbol for dried out trash. She claims that’s not her and you, but i find myself getting sobby.

More obfuscation from Judd Grossman, which does make for a pretty alt-grass song: “Christmas Tree” is about the brevity of love and the harshness of its mortality. Dance! Cry! Get over it!

“Christmas Tree” from Tiasa Ray is crooning, crying folk (raga?) about missing him like crazy.

The Temptations set the standard with “My Christmas Tree,” a soulful R+B flier about how she’s gone away and he’s lonely and what he wants for Christmas. The Supremes flip the gender.

Where oh where is she? “Christmas Tree” is here, but she’s not. Is she looking at her tree just like I am mine?! Slow country slop from Dave Jackson.

You’re not there “Upon My Christmas Tree” blubbers Stan with syncopated R+B. A retro 1970s spoken plea narrates the pathos near the end.

Alt soul from Sistiana’s “Christmas Tree” all about what she’s waiting for. Well, there’s Christmas, and you, and i suppose the tree.

Kolya Puga wonders where she is, but jazzes his pop vocals about that “Christmas Tree” as if it’s a trigger for his high flown wretchedness.

They’re so lonely around this time of year! Santa might visit, but he could bring a certain someone… couldn’t he? “Christmas Tree Blues” from Charley Jordan and Verdi Lee make their pain known in authentic 1935 blues. Painful (and maybe a bit naughty).

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Make Like a Tree and Leaf!

It’s Christmas! How could you be so horrible! Get away from my Christmas tree!

Mr. Richard & the Pound Hounds vants to be levt alone! “Up in My Christmas Tree” is where he’s hiding from All Of YOU! Go Away! …fun, wispy country rock.

Dick Stratton & The Nite Owls surely swing that country tune when they stare down their insignificant other and state “I Wouldn’t Have You on My Christmas Tree.” You’re no angel, you hussy!

Pure 1966 country corn from Loretta Lynn who invites you not to come back home, because “I Won’t Decorate Your Christmas Tree This Year.” She’s going home to Mama, you beast!

James Apollo gets the bongo beating, finger popping cool jazz hot with “Go Trim Another Tree.” Don’t come round here! He’s serious.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: The Forest Sylvan Ish If You Keep Using Trees as Symbols

You want Christmas tree symbolism? I’ll give you something to represent!

TEMPORARY JOY.

Dr. Dog tinkles on his great-aunt’s pianer with some alt folk sentiment about how much “Oh My Christmas Tree” does for such a brief time.

Crappedy crap crap time of year… then just the right greenery and a “A Tiny Tree Christmas” cures all that ails you. For now. Thanks, Ryan Miller, Guster.

Bobby Curtola has a 1964 dreamy pop dream how “My Christmas Tree” would save the world. With love and peace and cetera.

Heart Crimes consider a “Christmas Tree” so seductive as to be the gateway to hard candy. Pop fun.

Pretty much the whole Christmas thing centers around and “Round and Round the Christmas Tree.” Bing’ll tell ya. He knows.

Or listen to the Australians. Peter Senior lists out all the cool fun stuff that tweaks the fun-happiness in us all, including “The Christmas Tree.” ‘Billy rock.

STUFF & THINGS.

Moments, blessings… these are the flashbacks Briana Kay seizes on when sniffing her next “Christmas Tree.” Potent sorcery conjured by plodding country.

My God, my life, and my family stare out at Lauren Flauding when she takes in the wonder of “My Christmas Tree.” Introspective piano bar builds a strong defense against it just being a tree.

Jonathan Mann may get a bit random sometimes, but his comparison of “Christmas Tree” bliss to Dakota Access Pipeline nastiness stands out. Falsetto blues.

“I Love a Christmas Tree” posits Donna Cutler with gentle rocking. It’s all about peace and love and stuff.

Always room for one more awful song. Having belonged to a let’s-be-offkey group myself, i must give consideration to Mesforum’s “Christmas Tree.” What you see is… well, what is it?

JUST, WELL, EVERYTHING!

“Everything is One Big Christmas Tree” by Magnetic Fields may rely on a Germanic chorus, but surely you’ll feel the joy of this alt rock disenfranchised leap of faith. Yea, Xmas Tree!

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: If It’s Not Really a Xmas Tree, What is It?

All this damn songstuff makes me wonder what that holiday foliage really means to you.

GOD, DAMMIT.

“There’s a Christmas Tree in Heaven” comes out from Eddy Howard and His Orchestra (sweet) the same year as The 4 Aces (swinging). That whole sky constellation up above… it’s the same as in your living room.

There are no enemies on Loretta Allen’s “Christmas Tree.” Sweet gospel bluegrass promises the peace. Come and join, it’s God.

Brent Hardesty goes OG inclusive God with “A Menorah and a Christmas Tree.” either way it’s still the Big Guy! (Although, this particular day does seem to be a divisive point, truth to tell.)

THE GOOD OLD DAYS. WELL, I’LL TELL YA.

“An Old Fashioned Tree” makes 1950 sound like a past-it time. Gene Autry bemoans the cowboy loss of way back when, with the whole symphony and back up seniors.

Memories feature into Jeff Meegan’s jazz trio (with scat & flute) “Christmas Tree.” But jazz poetry, man… where do i start?

W.D. Hay scrapbooks out his life with “Christmas Tree Memories,” a homegrown country flashback or ten.

CHILDHOOD, YEAH!

Telstar Ponies keep the experimental ’90s alive with “I Still Believe in Christmas Trees.” It’s a whole lot of garage noodling, but it has a maudlin message just for you… and you… and you… and YOU.

Shy nature sloshes around some indie pop with modulation for the kids to revisit their youth in “My Christmas Tree is Looking at Me.” So everybody had that same dream at eight-years-old?

Soggy kneehigh memories from Mark Elliot “When Christmas Trees were Tall.” Bluegrass by the numbers.

Home and dead parents keep coming back to haunt Sonny James (w/Carole Smith) “Where the Tree Is,” a tinkly country number written by committee. Sonny’s reaching for it, give him that.

Similarly titled, “I Still Believe in Christmas Trees” from Ray Ray is power country about the magic in boyhood innocence. Perky nostalgia.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Family Pinaceae

It’s all about family, the Christmas tree. I mean, doy!

Sometimes it’s only for Dad. “My Father’s Christmas Tree” honors a WWII vet in the best way, decorating some fauna for a month. Spiritually amateurish sort-of country.

Mom and Dad time! J D Wages have the ‘rents reminisce to the glow of the lights “On Our Christmas Tree.” Pop country with a two-step proclivity. The drawling full on country version hails from The Animal Band.

Modern lite jazz from Roland Everett Fall who has stories to tell from his “Christmas Tree Memories.” Most feature a good Daddy.

“The Christmas Tree in Mother’s House” is the doorway to nasal nostalgia. Larry Whinnery whispers his country lullaby.

La la la, blah blah blah, “Christmas Tree” from Neal Lowry thanks God for family, but sings Hawaiian style country to the tree.

Light jazz rock, this time with feeling, from David Barnes. “Family Tree” takes us from the car, to the home, to the distant nostalgia, to the heart of it all. Awww.

All together at last! Let’s credit “The Christmas Tree.” It’s the only reason we hold hands. So says Rick Goldberg with pop pop jiffy pop country swing.

Broken family getting you down? wish you could consolidate two Christmas trees into “One Christmas Tree“? Just ask the good folks at Nitty Gritty Dirt Band for a game plan. They’ll pick and grin ya a fine hearthside yuletide setup.

Family dustups don’t spare the shrubbery! Billy Idol lightly punks in “Yellin’ at the Christmas Tree.” Daddy’s abusive, innit?

Too much family? Poppermost feels your pain with the high-larry-us “Family Christmas Tree.” Swinging pop with a snap and a crackle. You’re not getting away that easily!

TreeMendous Holiday fun: This is What I Plant, What I Really Really Plant

Yeah, yeah yeah. You want presents under the tree. Could you be more specific?

Inca Jones (as i’ve blogged) gets melted with he finds “LSD Under My Christmas Tree.” Don’t expect coherence from this electronica.

Here’s something you may not want: Beefus plays the blues (isn’t that trombone funny?) on “STDs Under the Christmas Tree.” They’re waiting for you.

Specifically, Brysi the Machinima Guy wants “Master Chief Under My Christmas Tree.” Pop culture begets fanfic and filksinging and other vaguely naughty-sounding made up words.The videogame  Halo‘s protagonist has give unto us this folk number. Get on it.

Bad Detectives ask for a “Cadillac Under My Christmas Tree.” ‘Billy + blues = finger snapping heaven.

Silent Stranger hard rocks (of course) “Guitar Beneath the Tree.” A tender tale of youth and obsessive thrashing.

Even better, John Jorgenson and Carlene Carter rock out a letter to Santa and the resulting “A ’55 Telecaster Under My Christmas Tree.” Okay, country rock, but still burning up the tinsel.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Junk on the Trunk

Let’s be honest. What’s the Christmas tree but a delivery system for gifts?

Don’t get your hopes up. The generic “Treats Under the Christmas Tree” are an excuse for The Mallon Tones to idealize their childhood. For rockabilly punk that’s progress.

Gringos Fate sing about “Christmas,” but it’s mostly about what will get put under that dressed up tree. Monstrously good below the border ‘billy.

Hyper jazz from Simon Strauß (Pachelbel influenced) excited for the presents and decorations and everything underneath our “Christmas Tree.” Children’s hope for world peace though really.

Comedy intermission: Joel Kopischke (i’ve already said) goes “Under the Tree” to the tune of ‘Under the Sea.’ He has the presents of mine to go full lounge lizard. Hah!

Sink or Swim want something good, better, worthwhile. They lightly metal their message to their “Christmas Tree” to get a decent present. Fun times, guys.

Too Much Joy act out an entire romcom with invasion rock styling for “Ruby Left a Present Underneath the Christmas Tree.” Might be a book… doesn’t matter. It’s from her.

Dave Rave & Rick Andrew rockabilly the quandry of what to put “Underneath My Baby’s Christmas Tree.” It’s a fun figuring, and suggestive of muchas smooches to boot.

Rockabilly for “Rockabilly Christmas Tree” from Al Hendrix and Jimmy Accardi. He gets it all: pomade, blue suede shoes, a Cadillac…. man oh man.

Poor folk don’t get much under the “Christmas Tree.” If they’re good they tremble in song about how they should give away what paltry bit they do get to another sufferer–even a piece of pie! Gospel folk from Significant Others makes this sacrifice a family legend.

Most of the romance around the Christmas tree has been noted elsewhere, but Chris Zindie ‘s chanty odd folk “All I Want Under the Christmas Tree” describes a gift that’s big and heavy (it’s you). I wanted the poor guy to escape the notice of the romantic police, ’cause he’s in trouble for his fun little song.

Funnyman Rodney Carrington tries on big band swing for “The Presents Under the Tree (Better be for Me).” He does care what he gets, and he’s a bit judgy.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Naughty Pine BLUE ALERT!!

Is there enough room around the tree skirt for some under the skirt action?

You might know Lady Gaga (w/Space Cowboy) has a risque number “Christmas Tree” which we’ll mention in passing. If this oral invitation is all you know, however, stay tuned.

“Christmas Tree” by The Lovers the French duo from Sheffield with Fred de Fred and Marion Benoist is only a 3 on the naughty meter. ‘Can You Show Me Your Christmas Tree’ w/francois accent.

“Under the Tree” is where The Superions seduce their intended… until the phone rings! Erotic alt.

Casper and the Cookies retrorock “Kiss Me Under the Christmas Tree.” Only first base (to start out), but i’m too busy dancing to miss out. Baby Jesus would agree: what a party!

Megan Simon has something to say to you and your new girlfriend. “Fuck Yourselves Around the Christmas Tree” is alt rock fun with an ice cold jazz deadpan.

Snowsnatch almost apologetically proclaims “I’m Gonna Fuck You Under the Christmas Tree Tonight.” This experimental mumble garage poetry may/may not get you in the mood.

Let’s plug in the dub box. A song like “Fuckin’ Under the Christmas Tree” otter be hip hop, even whiteboy styling. This blow by blow playbook is rhymed out from here to there… and there… and–  there!