Year-round Yuletide oddities
No money all year round means no money for Christmas gifts. No comedy. No calamity. It isn’t what it isn’t.
George Naschke figures he’ll ride out “Christmas Broke” nonchalantly, just taking it as it comes. His numb mumbling accompanies a killer blues guitar.
The Mansfields celebrate the sentiment succinctly with “Broke on Christmas Again.” Just so. It’s barely a 3 on the Anger Scale.
Destitution doesn’t mean you have to cancel Christmas. Celebrate the indigent spirit of the Nativity!
Jimmy Charles loves this time of the year so much that he has no regrets in his profligacy. “Broke for Christmas” (country pop, natch) celebrates the poor house as home sweet home. Awww.
Some couldn’t spend to begin with. Pierce Avenue harmonizes even less country-style country in “Broke Christmas.” Pretty. Vapid.
Hip hop rasta from Joel Evans exchanges no presents for your presence on a “Broke Ass Christmas.” Romantic, mon.
Country rock drives the rhythm of life, not the emptiness of despair. Brenda Dirk’s “Too Broke for Christmas” may complain, but line dances while doing so. Mama!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvDVIlTbgfg
What to do when you’re unable to shop for Christmas?
Usually, the song is the poor man’s gift. Vincent Ortiz makes a valiant effort at this shtick in his “Broke Christmas.” It checks three items off his own wish list, so okay.
Phillip Hudson and DJ Southanbred elegantly dodge the unmoneyed moaning in “2 Broke 4 Christmas.” This hip hop may be mean and sexist, but only in the most ingenious way.
Since we cry with a smile in our tragi-country, some flat out parodies of songs mock the paupers.
The obvious choice here is ‘I’ll be Home’ shortchanged into “I’ll be Broke for Christmas.” The best of these burdensome bits is from Robert Lund. Best here means well done, not good.
I do love the ‘Summertime’ takeoff from A Stone, “I’ll Be Broke for Christmas.” This is cool, fool, and you’ll rule the yule with just a molecule of this school.
Time for attempted comedy on behalf of those without a pot to jingle in.
Voice maestro Billy West overspends for fun in his sleazy pop “I Wasn’t Broke for Christmas This Year.” Conspicuous consumption comedy.
TampaStan picks and grins some lighthearted ‘grass in “This Christmas (We’re Gonna Go for Broke).” He’s spending more than he has but it’s all for a good cause: a funny song!
Bing Bupkis and the Krenshaw Kids toil to bring you a ’70s Christmas special style musical number with “I’m Broke Again this Christmas.” Thanks anyway.
Mitch Benn goes big with “We Pretty Much Broke the Bank this Christmas.” Showstopping drollery.
3rd Alley jolly up the dire circumstances with “Broke Christmas.” Doesn’t matter if you’re naughty when you’re for naught, eh wot? Bouncy tin pan alley.
Some extraordinary circumstances squeeze our resources when it comes to Xmas buying.
Ramon from Regular Car Reviews raps a sad set of stories about guys who have to buy a new car, therefore have no capital to gift unto family. “Broke for Christmas” is truly a one of a kind oddity.
Struggling funnyman Hadadington ukes it up with “A Broke Millennial’s Christmas.” He’s been working for free… Poor guy.
Jordan McAlinden recounts the bad gambler’s Christmas problem in “‘Tis the Season to be Broke Again.” British pop rock, which always adds a certain charm to the misery.
How bad does Christmas shopping credit card debt become?
Austin Lounge Lizards have an instructional doom-tune for you: “Credit Card Xmas.” Fun country rock that teaches you like a club to the head.
Morose folk from Rich Cashman. The sorrowfulness of “Credit Card Christmas” makes you want to be under the tree.
Asa and Christy Lennon busted up their car running over deer and with sudden new bills suffer a “Credit Card Christmas” this year. Their country pop makes the best of it. But you know this is a difficult time.
Tony Coleman sings gorgeous blues for his “Credit Card Christmas.” The man is hurting from his lack of financial foresight.
pee ess, the 1000th posting! yay!
Singalong and bitch! Even though using too much credit for Christmas shopping is wrong, it gives us something to sing about.
Cheery retro Brit pop care of Jacky Rogue festoons “Broke for Christmas.” On your feet! Sway with lighter extended!
Bouncy punk pop from Boston… Boston, England, that is. 50 sniffs dares us to enjoy a “Credit Card Christmas” through liberal libating. (Santander, btw, is a bank over there.)
Gnarly garage rock with a Beatles-like lilt fires up The BBB’s “Credit Card Christmas.” I wanna hold your debt, yeah yeah yeah.
Parodies of carols that bemoan our overcharged state? Look no further (and hope no farther).
Almost ‘Silver Bells,’ “Credit Cards” by MSU Singers is hard satire (read not funny). “Credit Offers” by the same crew is definitely ‘Deck the Halls.’ But the talent is starting to wear thin. Then “Here Come the Creditors” shows harmony, but is it ‘Here Comes Santa Claus’? Boy, you got me. “Visa Wonderland” also fishes for source music, but it’s much more fun. “Charge All Ye Faithful” is their best on this theme. Soothing.
Debt Free Squad runs ‘Jingle Bells’ into the bank for “The Debt Christmas Song.” Amusing.
Bubba Claus comes through with “Maxin’ out Our Credit Cards Again” (‘Winter Wonderland’). Listen carefully for the ‘Slingblade’ reference.
All that shopping! Are there any consequences?
Doctor Kitty bemoans the bills due after “Black Friday (Credit Cards Love Christmas).” Not sure they’re serious. Maybe it’s the lugubrious folk moaning.
Bob Wire with Chip Whitson want to celebrate the buying season with a rockabilly “Credit Card Christmas.” Fun with dads!
Prog rock from Natalie Pfeiffer seems to be some home grown talent from a decade or two ago. Still “Credit Card Christmas” has few regrets, so don’t worry, be hapless.
Just as retro comes Scottland with “Credit Card Christmas (It’s Gonna be).” This ’60s soft rocker invites us to singalong to bitch.