Sing a Song of Singing Songs: just sing no

It’s fun to say no no no (around Christmas time we call that ‘coal mining’). That Something Piñata gets experimentally kidsong for “Don’t Play Me that Christmas Song.” Uncategorizable nonsense, but in a good way.

Dr. Elmo got famous for a Christmas novelty song. So, for an hilarious sequel, he spun out an FM DJ singing “Don’t Make Me Play that Grandma Song Again.” Ha what ha.

On the other hand, hipsters gotta hate. Todd Chappelle (funny Philly guy) parodies McCartney’s ‘Wonderful Christmastime’ to the tune of earworm dithering. Don’t you wish they would NOT play some songs? Then why’s he gotta go the ENTIRE distance?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCxInfmJDLk

Sing a Song of Singing Songs: carol combo

Singing is part of the Christmas holiday. Hark, what did those herald angels do? Some songs even mention the act, in a fun ironic meta kinda way. No, they are not easy to come across, and some lines will be blurred in order to celebrate thusly.

Go with it.

Riders in the Sky have some virtuosic levity with the connectiveness of all carols with “The Last Christmas Medley You’ll Ever Need to Hear.” It’s largely instrumental, but they’re the cowboys who can swing it. JJ Dion has a “2.0 version” (now with a second verse) that really sings. Schticks to your funny bones.

Wendell Ferguson goes more melodic with “Why Does Every Christmas Song Have So Many Chords?” Slow country swing, deceptively so.

As Seen on TV: Hotel Transylvania/Milo Murphy’s Law/Teen Titans Go

The Adam Sandler toon movie series landed on Disney last year, but both are smart and rich enough to add some talent. “The Christmas Wrap Song” is kid mummy unleashing his inner present preparer for a few seconds in the stale comedy conflict.

Heir apparent to Phineas and Ferb, again features colorful Americans interacting with a soupçon of fantastical oddities. “Christmas, It’s Not a Time of the Year” is only glimpsed here, but showcases the creative team’s talent. Thank you.

The mutant DC spinoff that has cultivated cult followings spins out an occasional tune of ADHD length including “All Hail the Jolly Fat Man” (sweet jazzy fanfare).

As Seen on TV: Futurama/Robot Chicken BLUE ALERT

Most of Matt Groening’s scifi sendup has been played out here, like “Robot Santa Claus Song” and “Neptunian Elves’ Song.” Good stuff. “This Trinity’s Going to War” pits Robot Santa against Kwanza Bot and the Chanukah Zombie–except they’re not fighting one another, just Christmas. Meh. “Kwanza Bot Song” gets more editorially expository, like science fiction should. Pop Caribbean.

Seth Green’s cultural tantrums encompass childhood cartoons and pop, political, and religious icons in such a way to make all of them cartoony. And nasty, boy howdy they’s nasty.

For your consideration, a Justin Bieber “F*** Christmas” song for his own special.

“Santa Claus’s List” is an existential dilemma that may drive Big Red to eat an official Daisy Red Ryder Range Model 1938 Air Rifle BB Gun.

Just as offenisve, the “Hanukkah Gelt Rap” is not a play on the word guilt, but only more anti-semitism from that coy Jewish minx. See what he did there?

As Seen on TV: Game Shakers/Stuck in the Middle/Hank Zipzer

Ah, youth… wasted on the young, who make a holy mess of it.

RERUN: Seventh graders who hit big with their new app still have to grow up, but they can celebrate Xmas with their rapper friend Double G (Kel Mitchell) who sings for the show “Reggae Christmas Potato.” [Nickolodeon]

Over at Disney, corporate scrutiny results in perfectly formulated entertainment like a middle child (of 7) whose genius is overlooked by all except writers, audience, and the actors themselves. “Have a Happy Holiday” is such an overwrought piece of montage music you will forget it immediately.

Henry Winkler’s book series about a dyslexic teen suffering in a bureaucratic school comes to life in London with frantic antics and heart crushes just like the kids tune in for. The holiday love song “Home for Christmas” by cast member pop star Hayden Chase is poppin’ fresh (okay it sounds like everything else charting hot for preteens, but it’s the best of this lot).

As Seen on TV: Gossip Girl/Riverdale

Let’s just imagine the show by the music it picks, ‘kay?

“Oh It’s Christmas” by The Rosebuds is bouncy alt-pop fun, setting the instamood to light and flirty.

The Weepies garble through “All That I Want” for a contemplative but moody thinky scene.

“Chrismakwanzakah” by The Dan Band gets our party rebel on, but fun-sized and definitely not threatening.

Again, play the hormone level of these tunes off the will-they/won’t-they tensions of the show i won’t get around to.

Fascinations Grinds Chorus adds a pop ‘billy (shudder) to “This Christmas (Underneath the Christmas Tree)” so i guess at least one of ’em are hopin’ to be humpin’.

“I Know You’re Real St. Nicholas” is lounge folk with whispery undertones. Must be during foreplay.

As Seen on TV: Bob’s Burgers

Rarely has a smudgily drawn cartoon about middle class losers of–at best–annoying personality traits been rendered with and received so much talent and love. The show is at times cringeworthy and at others breathtaking, without any warning.

The songs are often brilliant. Though they can be headscratching…

“The Bleaken” is the marching song of the Belcher children on their way to confront a Christmas demon who steals presents. The song only has a couple lines, but a fan here are stitched together snippets to form the metallic battle cry anthem here.

During the same episode the mother stumbles upon a rave that has been constructed out of her stolen neighborhood decorations, but relents when the Queen of the Ball sings “Twinkly Lights.” R+B party music. The “Reprise” is actually better (a trademark of the show is the end credits music.)

The music also inspires groups to replicate it. The Nationals makeover “Christmas Magic” as an alt folk dirge. The original is noisy and crazy as a group improv folk number.

Rerun: “The Spirits of Christmas” is sung by landlord about the reason for the season–glug glug glug.

“Linda’s Christmas Dream” is the apotheosis of the sudden fragmentary musical number out of nowhere teaching us to live above our misery. Showstopping diva symphonics. (Mr. Present sounds nice.)

Let’s end on one of those end credit pieces. “We Can’t Spell Christmas Without US” wails and sells the jazzy show tune out of the park.