Christmas Countdown: 64

We Speak in Sounds has a nostalgic look back in the choral pop “I Believe in Santa Claus.” ‘Cuz if you believe you might get a N64.

But, the Nintendo 64 is just one of the punchlines (lousy presents!) in “Fuck Christmas,” a BLUE ALERT time of disappointment for young rappers Gentleman’s Vibe & IFHT (feat. Peter Chao). Raucous fun.

The Arkadian hard rocks the point here in “All I Want For Christmas (Is a Nintendo 64).” Stand back! This is serious!

All right already with the games! Life is more complicated than that, like the Secret Santa dilemma when you figure out you got the Jew to buy a gift for…. But All Students goes all in with “I Don’t Know What to Get.” Turns out Hanukkah presents are all cheap crap, so Some raisins… A balloon… 64 pack of crayons… and Burger King coupons. Problem solved! Electronica rap.

Christmas Countdown: 65

It’s been a minute since we’ve seen ApologetiX, so let’s review their lovely Eagles’ parody “Hotel Can’t Afford Ya,” in which Joseph complains ‘They probably haven’t cleaned in here since B.C. 65.’ Rockin’ hilarious.

“Santa Claus is Going Down 65” is a Harold Rippy troubadour trip of confusing directions. Makes me sad, but i can’t figure out why.

Homeless or otherwise poverty-situated Wuden Boi chant/raps “Merry Freaking Christmas” to hypnotic raga. It’s saddening/maddening to be alone and on a cot and sweating in the sixty-five degrees. Phew.

Christmas Countdown: 70˚

Seventy degrees may not seem like winter for some y’all. But it’s not hot.

Byronnnn sings And you know we in the south It might be seventy in the winter with cool R+B slickness in “Coolness Christmas.” Family traditions include devotion to God, Countdown on ABC Family, and oatmeal pies. Yes, ma’am.

It might be too early It’s like 70 degrees; But after waiting all year It’s right on time for me introduces “Christmas with You” by John Waller (feat. the Waller family), a swinging pop ensemble of musical fun. Family’s the thing, guys.

Family is the basis for love, and tragedy though. Matthew West’s tale is a country weeper ’bout the boy with the diagnosis in summer. Middle of September still seventy degrees Daddy climbs up in the attic Brings down candles hangs the lights on all the trees. “One Last Christmas” is the horror we’ve heard before, but it still gets ya. Dunnit? (Based on a true… yeah, okay.)

Christmas Countdown: 70

Seventy seems high (for elder years) and also low (for furnace settings). How far will today’s number take us… in rap?

PM has a BLUE ALERT “Wishlist” quid pro quo. For many, detailed sexual favors, she receives everything: including a 70″ plasma. Grawly rap.

Living fast and ballin’ at Christmas time, is Jim Jones’s answer to McCartney’s ‘Wonderful.’ “Dipset X-mas Time” has some baller wants, like: I think the coupe might do the hard thing (For real) Gotta do seventy and out pops the wing (Uh-oh). Laid back rap.

RodneyAlan gets all cozy with his rap “Whatchu Want for Christmas.” He purrs: Give me a melody Sing it to you when we’re wrinkly and seventy–and that’s what he wants from you, chuchi-face.

Christmas Countdown: 75

Pissed off at his own childhood nostalgia, Frontier Ruckus leads us a merry garage chase to “Orion Town 2.” The brass is brassy, the poetic lyrics beat: I-75 is the swallower of Christmas; The gloom of its gladness is night on our shoulders Connecting our sorrows like ponds with an isthmus. Grow up already!

Back onto the same route: I-75 is a dark roadway lined With the wild electricity of the Animal behaviors… Frontier Ruckus backtracks into banjo strummin’ screaming. “Driving Home, Christmas Eve” drives home the melancholia of Christ’s Mass.

“Rudolph Did a Whoopsie on My Rooftop” includes three quarter of a hundred weight of residue. Ivor Biggun does his music hall burlesque with a jazz bent here, and it’s crap-tastic.

A bit off topic, the talky experimental “Comatose Cakes Penguin” deals with the wintry feel of a dangerous flightless bird. ColdmaN5 explains that He takes a lot of naps 75 hours at a time–These aren’t naps; These are comas. There’s even a Xmas part where he decorates his room like a holiday with the dismembered parts of his enemies. It’s the merriest!