Category: rock

That’s a hazards descent, that chimney diving…

Man Down gets serious with pop rock in “Man Down the Chimney.” Appreciate what you got, not what you aren’t getting (like Santa’s gifts).

“Chimney On Fire!” is a series of unfortunate Xmas events from MORGEN (feat. Sydney Smithmartin). Bouncy hiphop that rolls with the troubles.

“Rumblin’ Tumblin’ Christmas” is Anthony Zarb’s hillbilly kidsong about the main means Santa uses. It’s not tidy.

Bad Shape’s Santa recognizes the risks “Down the Chimney” in an American rock reflection of Claus-hood obesity. (Many more fat songs await the blog later.)

Encore time! Just love Jerry Colonna’s childish warning: “Too Fat for the Chimney.” [Gisele Mackenzie reduces this glee to hand clapping swing band. Gee!] [A modern homage mashes dirge and polka to make fun of this classic. Blame A Harris & Hart Holiday.]

Mrcorbett beats the band slowly for the group sing “Silly Santa (Stuck Up My Chimney).” Bit of a Brit bitch-fest. Humorous or at least chucklesome pop, wot?

Arden Bright sings atonally against the plucking of strings in the mental wackadoodle of “Santa Got Stuck.” At least i get what it’s about.

vinnythecomb explains “Claustrophobia” as the wish to Not Get Stuck. Rollicking rock with a hook.

We’re not done with stuck Santa. No, not yet.

Encore! Soundtrack of Our Lives retro rock with experimental media until “Jingle Hell (Stuck in the Chimney)” is all mood and no meaning. Wild!

The Little Kids use chipmunk speed to entertain us with a ’60s kidsong that sucks so hard, it might get extract the victim when “Santa Claus is Stuck in the Chimney.”

Top of the Bus claims he’ll start sneezing and negotiating “When Santa Got Stuck up the Chimney.” Kidsong with menace. Just kidding! Peculi8 a cappellas the very same “When Santa Got Stuck in the Chimney,” making everything warm and cosy. Achoo.

The Surf Boys up the adolescence for “Stuck in the Chimney.” This time it’s Santa calling for help to classic R’n’R. Groovy stuff, 1966. [Fred Travers covers this with authentic bluegrass. Also cool.]

‘Dr.’ Bob Blake stumbles over the rhythm machine for his “Santa’s Comin’ Down the Chimney.” It’s not quite ‘O Susana,’ but it’s pablum nonetheless.

Easy listening from The Ohio City Singers half-asleep wondering who’s been “Down My Chimney Tonight.” I’m sleepy as well now.

Steve Weeks lounges up his easy listening to ask “Who Slid Down the Chimney?” Yeah, there’s a Ba-bee or two in there.

The Elfish Presleys sink to Elvis level with the retro rock question “Will Santa Come down the Chimney?” It’s only an orphan asking.

Sometimes love Christmas is a wholesome ideal.

Steve Weeks lames on the Elvis impersonation with “Whole Lotta Love at Christmas.” Soul with all the feels.

The Rubettes (feat. Alan Williams) also ladle out the love “Together on Christmas Day.”

Lovely loving in the hard indie “Christmas Love” by Gwens. It’s all we want.

Quiet Quota’s voices crack with sincerity in the show tune “Christmas is Love.” Won’t you let Christmas love you?

The Heebee-jeebees sell the doo wop “Christmas of Love” with a cappella loving. I’m dancing!

Christmas Kids Cottage rock out with “I Really Really Really Love Christmas.” They love it all: Jesus, mashed potatoes, everything!

Don’t forget Make Like Monkeys retro pop “I Love Christmas.” It’s a laundry list of the good stuff, but it rocks.

Santa’s not done with his lustful ways, neither!

Again! Bobby Parker grills up the blues for “Sandy Claw Stole My Woman.” Why oh why oh why!

Another again! Crusty Jugglers recount the honkytonkin’ blues of coming home from cross-country trucking and finding “Santa’s Boots” under the bed. Man.

Pressure 28 punk out “Santa, That’s My Wife” with indignation and chagrin. Pogo!

“MY BABY DONE RUN OFF WITH SANTA CLAUS” is the hand-clapping retro rock by JESUS OLDMAN you might want to spend some time with.

Let’s just get to the consummation of woman and myth.

Covering up a torrid affair? Blame that guy who is okay to drop by at night! But Unckle Eddie realizes CSanta Claus don’t come in July in “Summertime Santa.” Overly electric blues.

“Rollin’ in the Sheets” is the BLUE ALERT parody of ‘Rollin’ in the Deep’ but with Mr. Christmas making two to tango. Fizzbitch-goon goes all amateur out.

Fred Schneider & the Superions stage the sex act with Santa in “Santa Je T’aime.” It’s not so much a song as an exercise in voyeurism.

On the other mitten, Betty & Jack pretend to play garage rock badly with “I Don’t Want to Fuck You (Santa Claus).” Oh, and BLUE ALERT.

In fact, there’s not enough heterosexual encounters with that jolly old elf. So let’s gay one more time for the rock’n’roll “Sexy Santa” by Red Vs Blue.

Mush mouthed, “More Balls Than a Christmas Tree” is a bluesy intro to The Gifter from Dead Freedom. More cutely euphemistic than outright outrageous.

“TRAP SANTA” from Pineapple Posse is the BLUE ALERT mammajamma you don’t wanna be writing lists to. Rap for the bestial holidays.

“That’s No Santa,” that’s just my name, intone Cemetery Gator in this odd pop tell-all. It’s tubular (bells).

“Nothing for Santa” is the base complaint from The Resolutions (feat. Emma Rowley). Come on, guys! At least a pair of socks! Band rock that rocks.

Santa Claus is Missing! howls Pyreworks in their experimental church organ dirge “International Catastrophe.”

Where Have You Gone–? moans Rudy Casoni in the lounge act “The Christmas That Was.” But this time, the Sinatrator isn’t making with the comedy so much as the message. Santa died because we have forgotten the true meaning of Christmas. His body was found behind the Walmart

Aye Cay goes to extreme lengths to get even with Santa after being passed over. In bluegrass (reminiscent of Sufjan Stevens) he reveals “The Plot.” Not for the faint of hearth.

BLUE ALERT Rap “The Death Of Santa Claus” by Cult Activity (ft. Claas) holds no scruples over murder. Brutal.

Dr. Scythe catches “Santa’s Last Christmas” with lighthearted metal. Frozen is bad.

Bullet in the head, is the method from Infinity Greenhouse. Indie pop BLUE ALERT autopsies “Santa’s Dead” with musical precision. Don’t tell the kids, but they’re not sorry.

White boy rap from T Vinci (feat. Sully Gunther, James PM, Woolly Peaches & Yung Krusty) follows a fall and plow over. “Santa?” is only the beginning. The boys do the cover up and then do the job. But….

Valley of Love (Dan Barbanel · Amaury Massion · Joy As a Toy) overproduce the dramatic reenactment “Santa Died for You.” As much a march as just plain pop.

The Smothers Brothers sing their unfinished “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” redo with abrupt panache.

After the fall, whaddya going to do? Make Like Monkeys retrorock the answer in “Santa Claus is Dead.” Hint: you’ll need a lighter.

Santa Criminal? Sharks Teeth run with space rock (think Pink Floyd) as they deconstruct their “Broken Trust in Santa.” Thoughtful, but scared.

BSam goes to immense, though amateurish, lengths to parody Jeff Wayne’s (awesome) rock opera ‘War of the Worlds‘ with “The Christmas Eve of War.” The sleighs are invading!

“Santa Took My Car” croons the country Duck Logic Comedy about the inexplicable actions of the jolliest one. He was given permission (and keys), but he didn’t even gas it up when he returned it!

“Christmas Cheers” from the Not fur Longs is a saccharine song about Santa trying to steal the tree. Infectious!

“Enter Santa” is the metal parody The Withers uses to warn you off the breaker and enterer.

Dave Rudolf points out Santa’s criminal driving record in “Folly Old St. Nicholas.” It changes up that old Xmas song.

D’Modes employs hard rock silliness to portray the mental decline of “Psycho Santa.” First he came for your trees… and you said nothing.