Category: R&B

Anthropomorphic Snow Sculpture: pop 3

Twirling flakes and ice skates makes ya wanna dance (if you’re younger than 16). So, let’s get semi-nauseous with pop tributes to snowmen.

Technically a parody of the ‘hit’ ‘Chillin’ like a Villain’ from the Disney Channel’s Descendents show about offspring of cartoon bad guys, “Chillin’ Like a Snowman” is still so forced, so vapid, so MADLIBS tween slang edition that it qualifies as its category: sugar. Thanks, Sofia Carson.

While on the Disney juggernaut, travel back to ‘The Mickey Mouse Club’ to see Annette Funicello dancing and (eventually) singing “Hap-Hap-Happy Snowman” for all the leering cowpokes.

Michael Franks tries to pop the jazz with “When the Snowman Sings.” Ook ook a choke.

Just as jazz band fun is Ya Tafari’s “Mr. Snowman.” Yawn.

Vegas pop from Fancy travels back to the ’90s for which we are barely nostalgic yet for a heapin’ dose of “Snowman.” I am trying to avoid drug references for my snowman songs, but here–i can’t tell.

UK pop from Nathaniel Forrester in the bouncy form of “My Snowman.” Couldn’t get a date?

Pop pop from The Icicles (a Heyheyhey) fulfills emotional shallowness to the tune of “Snowman.”

Rock pop when Danny and Cindy Schneider ask the “Snowman” what he sees, thinks, feels, etc.

Nashville recording gamin Evin has a particularly puffy dance number in “Love Song for a Snowman.” She’s lonely so she makes an imaginary (boy)friend. That’s cool, innit? (His eyes are cookie dough, fagudnessake.)

Fun mod pop from Johnny & the Raindrops remind us these should be Xmas songs! “Someone Stole our Snowman”  is a search engine for where that ephemera went! Wot fun!

Retro romperama! The Del Zorros ’70s the pop with “Snowman’s Holiday.” It’s all cones and caps, baby!

Encore: The Crystalairs re-doowop up a flurry with “Snowman.” Put this on repeat, cats.

Back to the past for the actual fun! 1963 gives us Jaynetts’ “Snowman, Snowman, Sweet Potato Nose“–a real dance sensation. Dottdoo doddadoot doo.

Millie Small (‘My Boy Lollipop’) pops her heart out from 1964 with a similar sentiment but an opposite R+B tinged “I’ve Fallen in Love with a Snowman.” Twist and shower him with icy kisses!

Parodies’ Paradise: 2014 “Bang Bang”

Jessie J, Ariana Grande, and Nicki Minaj’s number was the lead single from Jessie J’s third studio album Sweet Talker… by the next year it was certified 5× platinum by the RIAA… as of 2016, the song has sold 3.2 million copies in the US… debuted at number one in the United Kingdom… reached the top ten in fourteen countries including Canada, Australia, Ireland, New Zealand and the United States… nominated for Best Pop Duo/Group Performance at the 57th Grammy Award… won Favorite Song of the Year at the 2015 Kids’ Choice Awards.

Katie Wilson (w/Chrissa Sparkles and Michelle Glavan) go big skit production with “Ugly Christmas Sweater.” Wow.

Parodies’ Paradise: 2006 “Apologize”

This debut single by OneRepublic from their debut album was the biggest radio airplay hit in the history of the Mainstream Top 40 chart in North America, with 10,394 plays in one week… a major hit internationally, reaching number one in 16 countries, including Australia, Austria, Canada, Germany, Italy, New Zealand, Sweden, Turkey, and the Netherlands, as well as staying at number one for eight consecutive weeks on the Billboard Pop 100 chart… peaked at number two on the Billboard Hot 100, staying in the top-10 for 25 weeks, and spent 13 weeks at number one in Canada… earned a Grammy Award nomination for Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocals… ranked number 50 on the list of the Billboard Hot 100’s All-Time Top Songs list from the chart’s first 50 years… spent 25 consecutive weeks in the top 10… also ranked number 10 on the Billboard Hot 100 Songs of the Decade.

The Murrays worry that Christmas is too much with us in their “Christmastime.” Damned fine funny business this.

Parodies’ Paradise: 1988 “Desire”

U2’s first number-one single in the UK and Australia… reached number three on the Billboard Hot 100 in the U.S… topped both the Modern and Mainstream Rock Tracks charts (the first song to reach the top of both of these charts simultaneously)… reached number two on the Dutch Top 40… won the Grammy Award for Best Rock Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocal.

“Messiah” by ApologetiX almost loses its meaningfulness in the balls out R+B.

Parodies’ Paradise: 1988 “The Man in the Mirror”

Michael Jackson peaked at number 1 in the United States with the fourth single from his seventh solo album, Bad (1987)…  nominated for Record of the Year at the Grammy Awards… topped the Billboard Hot 100 for 2 weeks… peaked at number 21 in the UK Singles Charts (in 2009, following the news of Jackson’s death, the song peaked at number 2)… became the number 1 single in iTunes downloads in the US and the UK (over 1.3 million digital copies).

The Mistletones worry about your celebrational culinary decisions around this time of the year with “Fat in the Mirror.” Quit eating out of the bottom of the barrel.

Parodies’ Paradise: 1965 “Get Off of My Cloud”

The Stones could do no wrong back the ’60s. After ‘Satisfaction’ they released this major success reaching number one on the Billboard Hot 100–remained there for two weeks… stayed at No. 1 in the UK Singles Chart for three weeks.

Bob Rivers goes Sinatra pastiche with the lounge lizard spin “Hey You! Get Off of My House!” Why!? Seth McFarland, sure, but why Bob?

The ’60s Invasion play in more Stones-ish with “Hey Dude (Get off of My Roof).” That’s more sensible.

Parodies’ Paradise: 1963 “Money (That’s What I Want)”

Berry Gordy’s 1959 record became a more famous song in the mouths of the Beatles… advance orders for the album With the Beatles of a half million and sold another half million by September 1965… the second album to sell a million copies in the United Kingdom… remained at the top of the charts for 21 weeks. (Never a single, but the album hit #11 on the record sales chart.)

Bob River’s antic ways disallows him to straight up parody a property. He throws a bit of Thurston Howell III into the mash for his “Christmas Money (That’s What I Want).”