Party rap from 69 Boyz, Quad City DJ’s, K-Nock and the whole Quad City family off the dam fine Quad City All Star Christmas album asks whatcha gunna get him/her for that special gift. The boys ask for a twelve disc changer and on and on. The girls start with twelve hundred dollars. So “What You Want for Christmas” makes our list of numbers. Worth it at the given price point.
Category: rap
Christmas Countdown: 1500 (BLUE ALERT)
We’ve about run out of yearly demarcations, so let’s get nasty again. Rich Homie Quan figures “1500” is the tipping point to A LOT. This year was a Merry Christmas ‘cuzza that many presents under the tree. Last year was sad ‘cuzza that many people shitted on him. So, yeah, that raps out to a lot.
Christmas Countdown: 1793
Some of these numbers must be code. In “1793 Christmas” 7 Alkaline describes a Holi-date that begins at Rockefeller Center and ends at the North Pole. What the enumeration denotes i couldn’t tell ya. But this fella’s trying hard and i sympathize with his lovin’ rap.
Christmas Countdown: 1823
Kids, rap was different in 1979. There was more melody than malaise in the intonations, ‘tho the rhymes were a bit more basic. That’s history! Kurtis Blow’s “Christmas Rappin’” points out this ain’t 1823 and we need updates on our Xmas sentiments. Like Merry Christmas and to all a good night!
Christmas Countdown: 1843
Calle Bini has a convivial rap style combining science, anthropology, history and Christmas in “One Degree.” I guess it means we’re not all that separated from each other, but Chas Dickens gets a shout-out for penning his ‘Carol’ in 1843 and popularizing religious observation as being about family.
Christmas Countdown: 1990
KillaTooma has visions of grandeur when he recounts his Carri-beat rap delivery to the world on Christmas Day, 1990 (intro-ed by a mother figure) in “The Arrival.” He come to prophecy like in Jerusalem…. He’s just messiah-ing with you.
Christmas Countdown: 1991
I’m leaving you today “Christmas Morning 1991” gushes Guts Crew Records with ukulele abandon in an attempt to garage band the breakup. Works for me.
Zach Sherwin jew-raps “Pop Music” judging his fatherless musical upbringing and exposure (BLUE ALERT excerpt from Naughty by Nature–which was a Hanukkah 1991 gift). It culminates in a rap battle much later. Regular Disney underdawg that boy.
Christmas Countdown: 2010 BLUE ALERT
Cry Baby Hank has a nose outta joint in “Christmas 2010.” His metal tinged rock seems to indicate he’s been done wrong by something female. The holidays do not ameliorate his anguish. So… BLUE ALERT
Twice as BLUE ALERT but violently non-apologetic about it Death Squad Kills rants more than raps “Christmas Final Fight 2010.” The chip outweighs the shoulder.
Luckier, DRTYUNCL remembers a BLUE ALERT love connection from “Christmas 2010,” an upbeat rap.
Christmas Countdown: 2015
Well, it’s Christmas 2015 in this shit-eating corporate dream, mourns The Felice Brothers with folk peevishness in “Carriage.” Everything sucks, and BLUE ALERT–if you hadn’t noticed.
Prefer sunshine? Hail The Holderness Family who ‘give back’ to their fans with “#Elfed,” a parody rap attempt to trend sudden jammie dancing in public. Thanks to their posted past accomplishments i know now they were spoofed on SNL.
Or just odd–?? fredfloston begs Santa “Don’t Break My Heart (Break My Balls)” in true electronic pop gonzo awfulness. This message is Stardate: December third, 2015.
Experimental cool from Zachary Byner’s “Scary Merry Christmas” hearkens back to that murderer in the house 2015. Adulterated (at least childish) pop that’s troubling more than scary.
Christmas Countdown: 100,000
The Oakwood Waits get medieval on “Wondrous Love.” Not sure what they’re counting, but there’s one hundred thousand of them. And it’s for God.
Lil B wants a million dollars when he hears “Santa is Coming (Christmas Spirit).” But this swaggeringly melodic kid rap invokes the hundred thousand line a couple times like it’s magic or some such. Could be the number of Kringles….