Now that the subject’s broached, let’s linger on that hammering headache you woke up with after Xmas celebrations.
Twangy country from Ron Bell drawls out a portrait of family failings in “The Day After Christmas.” Lots of broken, missing, hurting with a lively backbeat.
Rangy grunge from The Held retches out unfortunate life choices in “Thank God (Christmas is Over).” And, for good measure, BLUE ALERT.
Kent Goodson and Michael Panasuk look up from the mess of “The Day After Christmas Blues” and swear off bad habits, like conspicuous consumption in all its forms. Piano lounge blues.
Authentic music arrives in the form of “The Day After Christmas Blues,” country-funnin’ betwixt sharp guitar licks from JS Lawrence. This is more hangover regret iced with feeble promises.
One tradition we hold dear when the unwrapping is through, the returning’s begun.
Tim Markel uses metal to bitch (BLUE ALERT) the list of all the pointless pantomiming that’s through. First and foremost in “Christmas is Over” is returning the crap you gave him. It gets louder.
Shorty Garrett retries the rock’n’roll but leaves us with warm pop in “Shopping Shopping Shopping.” It’s largely about the mess before Xmas, but recommends snatching bargains after the masses ‘repeal’ their gifts 12/26.
Harmonica-rich country pop heralds “The Day After Christmas” from Jon Covert. Hyperbole about mad consumers mumbled over a jazzy ‘Jingle Bells’ rhythm machine beat is as funny as we can get here.
P.S. Didn’t know where else to shelve this maudlin poverty-stricken easy listening trembler… In “The Day After the Day After Christmas” Rick Paul recounts his ol’ dad’s sweet deals on trees and decorations when the season had ended and the money had long before run out. Holy moly.
Save me a corner by the Okay Chorale, i shine towards an authetic country melody. Make it Christmassy, feature the anticipation, and serve it up chunky and charred. Yummy-haw!
Them snow swept lonesome plains’ll make you pine for the clapboards of the old homestead, so sing Wild Bill featuring the Whiskey Shivers with “I Can’t Wait to Go Home for Christmas Again.” Yeah, it’s maudlin, but in a tight-lipped cowboy way. There’s no crying in cow-pokin’.
Driving folk may put me in mind of one-horse towns that’ll blow away in the breeze. Try LuLu’s “Can’t Wait for Christmas” to see how i’m persuaded.
Even pop, with the right cantering tempo, can put me in a mind of riding the range. Saddle up with Candy Apple Blue (feat. Nick Bramlett) and their not-quite-ironic “I Can’t Wait for Christmas.” Oh to be a child again, when a six-shooter had heroic glory–not political and social qualification.
You want the REAL cowboy song, like from Bonanaza? then try The Caroleer Singers from the old Peter Pan Records days and “Wait for the Wagon on Christmas Day.” This is as authentic as corduroy rawhide. But childish fun.
Perhaps too morose, Ben Aaron drawls “I Can’t Wait for Christmas” like he wouldn’t tolerate none of you-all’s foolishness no how. The hypnotic cadences, however, make my toes tap. It’s like candied chaw.
When does junk music win? When i want. Granted, we all have reasons why we dislike art (rushed/boring, pointless/overemotional, cliched/esoteric), but LIKING something has an ineffable quality (uhh… it’s good?). So let’s try some near hits that won me ever-so-slightly over. As i’ve always maintained, criticism is more revealing for the critic than for the art.
Force M.D.’s “I Can’t Wait ’til Christmas” is that sappy R+B that over polishes the cool, but you’ll find me boppin’ and jammin’ to this slickity doo dah.
Jump gospel temporizes the word o’ God, but Margaret McPherson jazz-sells “Can’t Wait for Christmas” to the point where i don’t worry the image-less cornpone–i dance. Like God is watching.
Jump jazz hypers out the improvisational arts–be cool, man! But the big ol’ hurry of “I Just Can’t Wait for Christmas Day” by LC Wells (feat. Cyriese Lambert) gives me a giggle. Play it when you’re driving to the store or diving through the websites!!
The attrition of kids’ music on my immortal soul is profound, but Shorty Garrett (of Bent Willow) applies the kazoo profusely, and the attention span punily with his “Goin’ to Grandma’s.” I fell like i’m bouncing all over the backseat me own self.
Boom Child’s punk is so popmusic that you must listen carefully for the rude snarky lines. “I Can’t Wait for Christmas” undersells the angry young men as an actual bit of fluffy fun.
Old guy with a guitar (self publishing) and two tablespoons of talent should up the acid reflux, but Robert Armand’s self-assured gentle country heap of empty lyrics somehow tip the balance for me. “Just Can’t Wait ’til Christmas” is neither infectious nor illustrative. But i admire. ‘Ndeedy i do.
The music I can ONLY swallow ironically is lounge swing pop. Surely it is never intended to be taken on face value….
Well Paul Rolnick is batting for the cheap seats with the ploncky “It’ll be Christmas Before You Know It.” IS he rolling his eyes? Naw, he’s icky earnest. Ew. (Billy Stritch might be pulling our leg with his silky version.)
Leaning into the curves (wait for it…) Joe Escobar sets up and eases into “Christmas Time’s Around the Corner” with such panache he didn’t even spill his martini. Smooth (except for that unnecessary brass.)
Piano jazz bar and a nod to Frank make Tom Deger & DarkHorse a nose ahead with their “It’s Almost Christmas Time.” Playful country electric and a drugged-out swirling helps.
Care to throw whatever you call Country-Western at the subject?
Square dance calling to a rhythm machine should turn me on, but “It’s Almost Christmas” by Harold Rippy is mesmerizing in a traumatic way. It’s almost 1970 cop drama TV series theme music.
Mike Aiken gets much more drawly and vapid for his “Almost Christmas.” A shopping list of cliches, a singsong guitar tune… done.
More guitar virtuosity from Harold Morton heralds a better vocal arrangement in “Christmas is Nearly Here.” Again, details–no picture. But that may be the most we can hope for from this industry.
When should you be home for the holidays? When it’s ‘almost’ Christmas. Well, get going….
Kristin Cifelli takes us to a homelike feeling with the Millennial angst of having one’s own place to celebrate in and how alien it feels with “Almost Christmas.” Bangin’ old folk style.
Also folk-bent, “Almost Christmas” from Danny/girl brings us [from the ‘Stick Man’ EP] to the domesticated domicile of yore. Heavy sigh. (The good kind, man.)
Reliving childhood, Jason and James Dake offer a pop folk feeling of nostalgic protection. “Almost Christmas Morning” is a warm hug. (Even the cat gets a stocking!)
Darryl Worley’s “Just Around the Corner” gives home the country-western treatment. Plenty of welcome, probably some guns. Honkytonk steaminess, so i’ll have two.
Billy Bob Junior seems to be more negligent of sense than criminal when he hollers the redneck epitaph “Hey Y’all, Watch This!” as a rent-a-Santa. As told by Slidawg & The Redneck Ramblers.
The poor orphan “Christmas Carol” asks the department store Santa if she can have a real home for Christmas. Jim Jensen takes the country pledge and… well, I do believe you can see what’s coming–if you’d just stop crying for a sec.
Greg Wilson brings in an old country weeper about that old guy what gets no respect, the “Dime Store Santa.” Paid his dues, did his part, tried his best. But then he died. How is that fair?
Just like some kids love the trip to the mall to see Santa, some mall Santas love to answer the calling of living the dream.
Mickey Rooney attempts to capture the early years in the Bass Rankin TV special groaner ‘Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town.’ All the tropes get discovered including what will come true “If You Sit on My Lap Today.” It’s so deadly serious a showtune, the young tune out of the show.
The Heebee-Jeebees admit to being a regular guy who just can’t wait to be stood in line for as a “Shopping Mall Santa Claus.” Country stomper humor.
