Category: country sort of

X-claim: hello (pt. 3)

What’s up with greeting the holidays? Songwriters think this is some amusing apostrophe to the personification of an institution, or sumfen.

Gabriela Radu sings like an impatient child calling out “Hello Christmas.” But the sultry rhythms and slurring diva tones creep out the kidsong genre. Run, Christmas!

(Maybe) not as skin-crawly, Peter Joannou (Brighton’s Singing Barber) galumphs through “Hello Christmas” as a maudlin, inescapable hearkening to olden times in that old smokey lounge lost from a distant decade or two. Shiver me Decembers!

Thwp adds “Hello Christmas” to their chorus to let the calendar know they’re on to the imminence of that festivity. Kid rock that stinks of pop.

Aging dad band Robocalls (fronted by Roger Bogren) rocks the Kohl’s with “Hello Christmas.” Creaky and not fully fluent with English, they get it their best.

Les Fradkin may have been something a while ago, but his grandpop pop “Hello Christmas, Goodbye Year” is too measured and mannered to be the rock he’s looking for. Trying to be hip without breaking one.

Newlife Music reminds us in “Hello Christmas” that the King is born. A little gloria is interjected thusly and this indie pop falalas hither and yon. It’s engaging stuff, but light on lyrics for all its message.

Josh Ingyu uses “Hello Christmas!” as a rollicking pop intro to the whole year of holidays. My calendar says otherwise, but i threw it on the floor when i heard this stomper.

Myla Smith demurs in her coy country-band yummy “Hello, Christmas!” (Finally: full punctuation!) Her reticence is from being on the receiving end of cheating, so it’s a wonder she’s as perky as this. Got a real Dolly-warble going for her (that’s a good thing).

ad silentnitum, concatenated

Another Christmas without love is not simply another Christmas. It’s salt in the wound, a twist of the knife, a dump in the middle of the art museum.

Prince encores his “Another Lonely Christmas” with echoic haunting charm. When he says you’re the only one, it’s not like anyone else can say.

Tom Chaplin stiff upper lips “Another Lonely Christmas” with Britpop overtures and alto-hope. Did he say in Hell? Aww, wotta sweetie.

Ladies’ turn! Mean over-pops “Another Lonely Christmas (A Lady Christmas)” as if it’s all about the vocal range and not the emotions.

More affecting, Patty Blee (w/Ernie Trionfo)’s whiskey throated country strummer “Another Lonely Christmas Eve” barely makes its trembling way through the tough times.

Soul sets the sad scene in Aaron Skyy’s “Another Lonely Christmas.” Every instrument is set on weepy.

Country bummer is its own sub-genre, represented here by John Eddie’s “Another Lonely Christmas.” Heartfelt hokum.

Jackson Taylor’s “Another Lonely Christmas” is appropriately twangy country, yet the hint of zydeco makes me feel upbeat. The magic of music heals.

Carol Told by an Idiot, 15

Sometimes i’m stumped by the sentiments of the Xmas song i’m compelled to share. But these earfuls must needs be heard.

Randy Rainbow’s “Hey Gurl, It’s Christmas!” traipses all over the agenda with show tune anger. But he does sashay with cachet that it’s not so bad because it’s Christmas again.

LaGlavas (feat. Viktor) veers wildly from middle of the road easy listening to (attempted) angry rap in his “Christmas Again.” But he won’t stay in his lane–didgeridoo fade out….

The Chandler Travis Philharmonic screeches and sleazes through “It’s Almost Christmas Again” like a drunk overloaded train. Yes it is that much fun. Blues pop, i think.

Marty Robbins seems to be country scolding with his cowboy pop warbling in “Christmas Time is Here Again.” Lot of shoulds and mights leave this all up in the air.

Life After X-a word from our sponsor

Did we forget Jesus again? Is Xmas the only time to remember?

Matthew West’s “Day After Christmas” is the syrupy pop that bridges the musicphiles with the eager Christians. It’s tasteful, yet certain. Merry rest of the year.

The Glenn Mohr Chorale take us to church with “The Days After Christmas.” Strong message, lots of good voices, not so much with the harmony though.

Richard Sponaugle, however, walks us through blasphemy, epiphany, and the forgiveness to go on with his bebopping country song “52 Weeks Until Christmas.” No longer to complain and cuss.

Life After X-woo-o-oo

Sometimes the mixed up feelings after Christmas has rolled over us cause hard to define anxieties/peevishness. Let’s suffer along….

No more presents to unwrap is metaphor for Lonely Robot in “The Morning After the Night Before Christmas.” It’s all just marking time, this march from birth to death. Garage-fueled pop. After the unwrapping, the ennui.

That countdown may devour one’s soul. Without a sense of time, John Gannon’s protagonist is fretting about the “364 More Days.” Showtime pop with a clarinet edge.

Cledus T. Judd also expresses math angst with his silly country smiler “364 More Shopping Days ’til Christmas.” Heard this one before, but he’s funny.

Life After X-keep on lovin’

Maybe the love will outlast Xmas… i mean, without the mistletoe, that magic feeling could still… couldn’t it?

Start here: “Don’t Take Down the Mistletoe” recommends Misty River with haunting lady harmony in this folk sudser.

Remembering this Christmas love “Long Past Christmas Day,” Terry Wetton dwells in a mandolin riff of almost Celtic country wistfulness.

Channeling their inner Elvis, Beatnik Turtle wishes “The Morning After Christmas” to just have a little more with you. Pretend, in rocking doo wop, it isn’t over.

Ken Kondrat and Dave Uchalik figure that “After the Holidays” there’ll be more time to be a couple–even if it takes all year. Sock hop bebop.

Plunking hard on that pee-yanner, Bob Malone bemoans the afterness of Christmas in “The After Christmas Song.” But he still wishes you love and stuff. That gravelly voice makes you believe.

Hilariously awkward, “The Day After Christmas” scripts the wrong guy at the wrong time (with the wrong gift) not making a dent in love, despite his worst intentions. Pretty folk pop from Delightful Young Men.

Brad Paisley agrees. “364 Days to Go” slow waltzes the country music to maintain Christmas did it’s job. We’ll stay connected for the next year.

Life After X-not so loud

Now that the subject’s broached, let’s linger on that hammering headache you woke up with after Xmas celebrations.

Twangy country from Ron Bell drawls out a portrait of family failings in “The Day After Christmas.” Lots of broken, missing, hurting with a lively backbeat.

Rangy grunge from The Held retches out unfortunate life choices in “Thank God (Christmas is Over).” And, for good measure, BLUE ALERT.

Kent Goodson and Michael Panasuk look up from the mess of “The Day After Christmas Blues” and swear off bad habits, like conspicuous consumption in all its forms. Piano lounge blues.

Authentic music arrives in the form of “The Day After Christmas Blues,” country-funnin’ betwixt sharp guitar licks from JS Lawrence. This is more hangover regret iced with feeble promises.

Life After X-return to vendor

One tradition we hold dear when the unwrapping is through, the returning’s begun.

Tim Markel uses metal to bitch (BLUE ALERT) the list of all the pointless pantomiming that’s through. First and foremost in “Christmas is Over” is returning the crap you gave him. It gets louder.

Shorty Garrett retries the rock’n’roll but leaves us with warm pop in “Shopping Shopping Shopping.” It’s largely about the mess before Xmas, but recommends snatching bargains after the masses ‘repeal’ their gifts 12/26.

Harmonica-rich country pop heralds “The Day After Christmas” from Jon Covert. Hyperbole about mad consumers mumbled over a jazzy ‘Jingle Bells’ rhythm machine beat is as funny as we can get here.

P.S. Didn’t know where else to shelve this maudlin poverty-stricken easy listening trembler… In “The Day After the Day After Christmas” Rick Paul recounts his ol’ dad’s sweet deals on trees and decorations when the season had ended and the money had long before run out. Holy moly.

Wait for the Round-Up

Save me a corner by the Okay Chorale, i shine towards an authetic country melody. Make it Christmassy, feature the anticipation, and serve it up chunky and charred. Yummy-haw!

Them snow swept lonesome plains’ll make you pine for the clapboards of the old homestead, so sing Wild Bill featuring the Whiskey Shivers with “I Can’t Wait to Go Home for Christmas Again.” Yeah, it’s maudlin, but in a tight-lipped cowboy way. There’s no crying in cow-pokin’.

Driving folk may put me in mind of one-horse towns that’ll blow away in the breeze. Try LuLu’s “Can’t Wait for Christmas” to see how i’m persuaded.

Even pop, with the right cantering tempo, can put me in a mind of riding the range. Saddle up with Candy Apple Blue (feat. Nick Bramlett) and their not-quite-ironic “I Can’t Wait for Christmas.” Oh to be a child again, when a six-shooter had heroic glory–not political and social qualification.

You want the REAL cowboy song, like from Bonanaza? then try The Caroleer Singers from the old Peter Pan Records days and “Wait for the Wagon on Christmas Day.” This is as authentic as corduroy rawhide. But childish fun.

Perhaps too morose, Ben Aaron drawls “I Can’t Wait for Christmas” like he wouldn’t tolerate none of you-all’s foolishness no how. The hypnotic cadences, however, make my toes tap. It’s like candied chaw.

Wait for Maybe

When does junk music win? When i want. Granted, we all have reasons why we dislike art (rushed/boring, pointless/overemotional, cliched/esoteric), but LIKING something has an ineffable quality (uhh… it’s good?). So let’s try some near hits that won me ever-so-slightly over. As i’ve always maintained, criticism is more revealing for the critic than for the art.

Force M.D.’s “I Can’t Wait ’til Christmas” is that sappy R+B that over polishes the cool, but you’ll find me boppin’ and jammin’ to this slickity doo dah.

Jump gospel temporizes the word o’ God, but Margaret McPherson jazz-sells “Can’t Wait for Christmas” to the point where i don’t worry the image-less cornpone–i dance. Like God is watching.

Jump jazz hypers out the improvisational arts–be cool, man! But the big ol’ hurry of “I Just Can’t Wait for Christmas Day” by LC Wells (feat. Cyriese Lambert) gives me a giggle. Play it when you’re driving to the store or diving through the websites!!

The attrition of kids’ music on my immortal soul is profound, but Shorty Garrett (of Bent Willow) applies the kazoo profusely, and the attention span punily with his “Goin’ to Grandma’s.” I fell like i’m bouncing all over the backseat me own self.

Boom Child’s punk is so popmusic that you must listen carefully for the rude snarky lines. “I Can’t Wait for Christmas” undersells the angry young men as an actual bit of fluffy fun.

Old guy with a guitar (self publishing) and two tablespoons of talent should up the acid reflux, but Robert Armand’s self-assured gentle country heap of empty lyrics somehow tip the balance for me. “Just Can’t Wait ’til Christmas” is neither infectious nor illustrative. But i admire. ‘Ndeedy i do.