Author: douglove1225

Smoke

Cozy up!

“Fireplace” by Sam Shrieve is pop on a romantic creep. All he wants for the holidays is you by the fireplace. Willingly? Doesn’t say.

Piano lounge from Benton Stokes looks forward to “Sitting by the Fire with You.” Sentimental fool.

“Sittin’ by the Fire (With My Dear)” is the repetitive calliope of a love song from Fruitcakes. Is it hot in here?

Deconstructivistically, The Non Traditionals soothingly croon about the need for a “Forest in My Chimney” to make the fire possible. So–those burning things… used to be trees?

Simile from Endiamonds slurs the indie pop of “You’re Like A Fireplace.” A smoke show, i reckon.

The cast of ‘Naughty… But Nice’ R+B about the “Fireplace Man.” He’s the almost unseen man on the TV version, but still seductive.

Optional Fan

How nasty can novelty songs about chimneys get?

“Santa’s Cumming Down Your Chimney, Stay Still” commands  Saint Replace The N With A D ick. This gruntfest of an R+B sexcpade skirts the blue alert label, just barely.

The sissy dicks earn a provisional BLUE ALERT for their bluegrass hollering in “Cum Down My Chimney.” It’s pretty nasty.

Especially nasty is “Chimney Sweeping” by Spoon DogG (ft. T​-​Pop). Barking rap without class.

Classily obscene is T. Kyle’s “I’m Coming Down Your Chimney.” It’s EDM, but clothing optional. Catchy or just stuck in a rut?

Stack

Encore the euphemisms! Currently Disconnected threaten us with what is “Coming Down Your Chimney.” He’s gonna do stuff to your cookies!

Cory Goodrich divas the jazz suggestion “Santa, Come Down My Chimney” with gusto. I’m blushing.

Ryan Lindsey (with help) croons the jazzy “I’ll Come Down Your Chimney” with a cocked eyebrow. Slow in pacing but not to be denied.

“Down the Chimney” from FSO (featuring Miss Amy) raps the merry Christmas with a little extra.

Susan Madson adds extra torch for “Santa Your Comin Down My Chimney Ain’t Ya.” Lounge jazz that may leave you a bit sweaty.

Chimbley

Smoke and mirrors can hide the tricks of the trade. Let’s get euphemistic!

“Chimney Smoking” is the drug reference (finally) with R+B rapping from Duds (feat. Maine the Medicine, Mike Tek & Gus the Savage). Swirly twirly.

I prefer the sexual innuendo, so let’s dial up Coco’s “Chimney.” A Carib-beat for some eyebrow waggling suggestion or two.

Confidence Man portrays a gal waiting for when “Santa’s Comin’ Down the Chimney.” She wants a dance, or a beat, or both. Things that make you go Hmm.

Brad & Barry know the ambience of a “Hot Sexy Chimney.” Halting R+B that suggests a mood.

Barbara Carr means more than one thing when she asks Santa “I Need a Man Down My Chimney.” Funky, funky, nasty soul.

Brick

How does Santa NOT get stuck?

Chimney sweeps are the answer, so F.A.I.R.Y. pop the folk in their moving “Chimney.” Well done!

Brett Vargo fronts the Vargo Family when he belts out “Straight Down the Chimney.” American rock with a hint o’ Motown makes a party of the arrival.

Still, he comes. The insistence featured in “Coming Down the Chimney” by J.R. Top may not be turned aside. Feeling the Zappa here in this anti-pop.

Sp[oken word experimentalism from David Allen gives us Santa’s commandments for your “Chimney Stack.” Pay attention!

Cap

Does the fire scare you? Come closer–

Taken aback, the group Christmas! demand Santa “(Get The F​*​ck Back) Up The Chimney.” BLUE ALERT for their overreaction to an expected scenario.

“Comin’ Down your Chimney” by Orifice DeathFuck is a metal scattershot of abusive threats and shrieking. If that’s your thing. BLUE ALERT

What’s scaring me is Goiter’s “Stockings Hung by the Fireplace.” This experimental indie is light of tone and short of breadth. Yet, like a dentist’s drill, it does seem never to end.

HorrorScene’s “Chimney Creeping” wishes you Merry Christmas Baby amidst the echoic Prince impressions and R+B swirling. But, deeper inside, the threat becomes real.

Flue Liner

Are you looking for trouble?

Encore! Dave & Jeanine caution you to “Put Out the Ol’ Yule Log.” It’s not just for Santa, it helps with the not burning to death thing.

Bah &The Humbugs recommend “No Smoking in the Chimney.” The Surgeon General backs up their folksy pop.

Nice amateur parody from The Dodge Family: “He Must’ve Come Down Through the Chimney.” Didn’t anyone hear him?

Traffic jams?! Desperate Band Appreciation Society recount via R+B chattiness how “I Met Santa in the Chimney.” They have a comical moment there.

Keenan McKenzie swings the big band worries with “You Can’t Lock the Chimney.” Worry much? I mean what comes in must go out and all that jazz.

Hood

Worst case scenario–Santa’s never going to age stuck forever in the chimney!

Encore! Gatorhogs don’t know what happened (was the roof too icy?) but they face the “Empty Chimney” with pop grace. And, well, waiting… there’s no corpse anywhere.

Now setting Santa on fire might be different than killing him in the chimney, but The Glenn Crytzer Orchestra is so swing band cool it have to include “I’m Sorry Santa Claus.” Drop and roll!

“Chimney Skeleton” tells you all you need to know. But if you want the full minute story that makes children cry ask The Murrays and they’ll spill to pop.

dummytri is pretty sure “Santa Died In My Chimney“–who else could that dead body belong to? Wacky basement amterur pop.

“There’s No Santa Claus” is the horrible lesson from Colburn Sound Express. It begins with Dad being late home from work Xmas Eve… OMG–Hand clapping pop. (It’s the story from a movie–can you guess which one?)

Hot Buttered Elves have some Weekend at Bernies business after they find the overlong stuck Santa. “Christmas on Ice” is bossa nova fun–at first.

Cap

That’s a hazards descent, that chimney diving…

Man Down gets serious with pop rock in “Man Down the Chimney.” Appreciate what you got, not what you aren’t getting (like Santa’s gifts).

“Chimney On Fire!” is a series of unfortunate Xmas events from MORGEN (feat. Sydney Smithmartin). Bouncy hiphop that rolls with the troubles.

“Rumblin’ Tumblin’ Christmas” is Anthony Zarb’s hillbilly kidsong about the main means Santa uses. It’s not tidy.

Bad Shape’s Santa recognizes the risks “Down the Chimney” in an American rock reflection of Claus-hood obesity. (Many more fat songs await the blog later.)

Flue Lining

Santa Claus? Chimneys? What could go wrong?

Encore! Make Like Monkeys decide with odd Addams Family pop that the chimney might be a murderous ambush in their fine “Mine!!! Rub Out Santa.”

Bob Rivers enlists a cutie pie little girl to sing “A Chimney Song,” a horrifying time lapse about outwaiting the chimney blockage that’s starting to smell.

Kyle Dunnigan adds some BLUE ALERT to “Santa’s Stuck up in Our Chimney.” ‘Daddy’ starts crying, but the redneck daughters country carol their misunderstanding into some kind of grisly standoff. Then start on the fingers….

“There’s a Dead Man in the Chimney” is Podge ‘n Rodge’s confession to gunplay on the red-suited intruder. But this is not Chicago vigilanteism, it’s Irish justice.

Aliens Pat says it all (in 10 seconds) with the ragtime “Santa Fell Down the Chimney.” Got it?