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Connie Francis kitsches up “I’m Gonna be Warm this Winter.” This 1959 ur-rock pop starts out in a ski lodge. Then… love. Kylie Minogue copies this for no good reason.

Ski with Slope” is Wyegee messing with us emotionally. You know that thing where music reaches in and pulls out your still beating heart, dances with it, then puts it back in, and brushes you off. A bit like that. Electronica.

Beatgum brings us more traditional rock (finally) with the trembly “Hot Skiing.” Desire and appreciation without much mountaineering. But… rock.

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Triple Black Diamond crunches the garage for “Slopes (Rough Cut).” Gentle, but trending downward.

Cute flute on the classical travelogue “The Frosted Slopes” as conducted by Derek and Brandon Fiechter. Over hill and dale.

Cassels amuse with the ironic punk portrait of a square in “Charlie Goes Skiing.” His failed holiday is just the start of his problems. Will he be saved?

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Kicking off with a ‘Better Off Dead’ sound bite, “Ski Slope” from Cute Aesthetics mines the bebop walk beat of ’80s attitude movies for a never-ending stroll down wintery lane.

Patient Corgi fuses ’80s electronic action movie soundtrack with primal rhythms for “Ski or Die.” It slaps.

Bikini Skiing” seems to be about dating, or at least getting past third base, on the alpine decline. Waterlaso threads getting hot and heavy around a rather insistent alt-rock beat. Might as well dance.

Chad Mitchell Trio folk-spins the tale of “Super Skier.” While a parody (of The Kingston Trio’s “M.T.A“) spoofing the pop folk iconoclasm of the time (1961), this grisly saga is too upbeat to believe. (Bob Gibson’s gory sequel–to ‘Battle Humn of the Republic’–“Super Skier’s Last Race” might be ironic. Oh heck, his album Ski Songs is worth a whirl.)

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Triheart’s “Slushy Slopes” is that new kind of mix with classic rap, violin, and inclement weather. Trippin’.

Stuttery “Skiing Hills” from Dino brings string instrumentalizations to new heights. And they teeter there.

Fukushima Dolphin take their time, but “The Ski Slope” puzzles through garage depths like climate change and taking those turns hard. Club beats.

Rock time. Pierre & Slopers doo-wop “Let’s Go Skiing” to new heights. Snow bunnies and snow moose only.

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Quality Kidd locks on to a def beat and stays there for studio electronica “Ski Resort.” This works as backdrop for some tense dramaturgy.

Dullfenita tickles the solenoids for the electronica “Skiing.” The powder is like percussive, bro.

Experimental alt-jazz from Thunted Hex slices and dices lyrics and hunger sounds for “Up on the Ski Slope.” I’m so confused.

Outsider Joye Bell asks “Let’s Go Skiing.” This fun proclamation skirts Motown and pop and becomes it’s own rocking thang. I’m ready.

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Kicky garage pop from Winter Vacation wonders about the fun “On a Ski Slope.” You may wonder as well. Or listen. Both are fun.

Piamini’s “Skiing” features quiet noodling on an electronic keyboard–on a loop, with an occasional Hey. Hypnotic lo-fi.

Funnier, for an instrumental, Arne Hanson & The Guitarspellers romp through the big band polka of “Ski” just for mogul merriment. Hee hee.

The Invitations wax their slats with soul for “Skiing in the Snow” The funk power and a tom-tom beat shreds the hills. 1966 Motown. [Oops, looks like The Beach Girls may have dropped this first.]

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Excellent surf rock from Suffering Fools tells the tale of “Santa’s Going Skiing.” It’s strictly recreational. Though he is a master.

Paul Kopetko’s “Skiing Yeti Mountain” is background music for the 16-bit video game. It’s an electronic throwback to the ’80s. Tubular.

Dan Reeder’s “Skiing Song” is supposed to be a song about skiing, but his existential blues distract the message. Lovely gentle folk. About Skiing. Sort of.

Frank Yankovic reels us back with ski poles-ka (doesn’t quite work, does it?) in the hoot and a half “Let’s Go Skiing.” Step-by-step accordion supervision.

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I Lost All My Hair in a Skiing Accident” says it all. Trencher’s odd child-friendly metal punk piece is shorter than the title. But still rages.

Andorran music-maker Arinsal may know something about “Skiing Sessions.” But his Bossa nova beat instrumental suggests heat more than slaloming.

There’s a ‘Jingle Bells’ parody going around–“Broken Skis“–that’s as basic as novelty gets. But it’s fun to inflict it on others, so here you go. Oh, and Amber Waves Band brings it us with bluegrass. Almost makes up for the earnest original carol belted out after the funniness.

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Skiing (my favorite word with a double i) probably predates skating. But like most cool European inventions, it may have originated in China (i’m looking at you, notebooks of daVinci). This is not a backyard/neighborhood activity, like sledding. You won’t see Charlie Brown schussing in the cartoons. Which means… these songs don’t exactly spring out of the snowbank. I ask you to make some allowances.

Perhaps you’re familiar with “It Happened in Sun Valley,” a lovers’ meet-cute on the Idahoan slopes originated by the Glen Miller Band (feat. Paula Kelly, Ray Eberle, Tex Beneke and The Modernaires) from the motion picture ‘Sun Valley Serenade.’ For all that, it comes off as the documentarian or forensic analysis of some rom-com. South Park does an irreverent big band update.

To help pad my month of interesting Xmas/wintertime tunes, i may finally stoop to lyric-less instrumentals–provided they got class out the ass. F’rexample, Al Caiola & Riz Ortolani’s “Holiday On Skis” is just the right blend of electric jazz guitar and batch’ pad cool.

The novelty gold comes from R. Wyly with poor sound and VHS striations: the wry funky folk of “Skiing for Jesus.” Xmas adjacent.