Year-round Yuletide oddities
Again?! Steel Panther set the amps to MOIST with a hair metal tribute “Sexy Santa.” Yikes!
Again, again?! Jody Quine bebops some R+B lounge torch singing with “Got My Eye on You, Santa.” Despite Big Mr. C’s reciprocation for a mo’, feels creepy.
After hours lounge tinkling helps Emma Wallace quiet the siren in “Santa, Take the Night Off.”
Again? Merrill Leffmann lounge divas “I Love a Man in Uniform” (meaning red suit, black belt and boots) with extra boop boop a doop.
林靜翬 winifai goes smokey, sultry lounge siren to recall childhood in the disturbingly evocative “[I Love You, Santa].” (The brackets indicate translated lyrics.)
“Santa Claus (I Love You)” by The Ruby Plumes gets garage alt hung up on the complexities of intimacy. Authentic, but perhaps not so honest.
Some Bo Diddley parody from Dana K and the Remedy’s “I Love Santa.” Oh, it’s on.
Some flashy DJing by KiofNC in the paltry “I Love Santa, But I Ain’t Sittin on No Grown Mans Lap.” Mixed messages.
Sami Stevens & Kaz George get moody with all that jazz a la “I Love You Santa.” It’s sad, but follow that crossed star!
“Santa Claus, You Broke My Heart” is Shallow’s epic pop opus about love lost. Heavy sigh.
Serious honkytonk from Werewandas result in some heartbreaking mishegas with “I Love You Santa Claus.” How could you, C?
“MY LOVE, SANTA CLAUSE” by Cyber X (feat. Jody Watley) is EDM with an expected beat (may cause seizures). But the song does get a little PG-13.
勇吾は人生であるYUGO introduces a soul-infused instrumental with the admission “Santa I Love You.” Not sure if it’s consensual….
“I Love Santa” by Kim Stockwood ups the rhythm with a really old fashioned swing. Honkytonk outplays nightclub for romanticizing!
“Love Santa” by Kang Er (feat. DAPHNE D) take us back to kidsong innocence–it’s not time to get too nasty yet about the big guy.
Sky Vaux Fuller w/Chasen Hampton confesses to a snowman “Santa I love You.” He never lets one down, always comes through, nothing he can’t do–sound too good to be bubble gum pop?
The band Harris waxes angelic with their “2013 I Love Santa.” Children sing the darnedest things.
StarFish lead the kids in a noise-repeating row with “I Love Santa Claus.” No Simon Says, just follow along with this grand ukulele kidsong. (Everybody pinch your bum!)
Better novelty is the toy piano with the cracking voice of an underager: “I Love Santa Claus.” Dixieland jazz from Paul Thomas!
Dolly Parton tones it down and keeps it kid friendly (they sing along) with her (country of course) “I’d Like to Spend Christmas with Santa.”
Melody uses signs to convince us “Santa Santa I Love You.” Either that or she’s having a series of seizures. Kid pop that seems to never end.
Elf Orchestra tunes up the band for “Santa I Love You.” Kidsong that moonlights as R+B torch.
Happy 2B Music uses synth to pretend to be kids who can sing with “I Love Santa.” It’s heartfelt treacle, the kind insulin can address.
It’s time to inject some romance into the snark. Let’s ship Santa and, well… you! Or me. Or someone else.
Perhaps most notoriously, Eartha Kitt owned “Santa Baby” as a (quid pro quo?) love song to Mr. Spendy. She even followed it up with a sequel the next year: “This Year’s Santa Baby” updating the gold-digging. For novelty purposes, i approve of the punk update by The Dirty Panties. But let’s close this squirmy throwback with a modernist view from Miley Cyrus on The Jimmy Kimmel Show. Me too, Santa!
Kylie Minogue stirs pop into the jazz with her extensive list of wants, but “Oh Santa” she really wants a kiss from inside that big beard.
While we’re country, y’all, Angela Watson belts out the family friendly “We Love Santa Claus.” Love CAN be bought!
Retrospect mashes up old carols for the DJ kicker “Santa Says We Have to Go.” Play it for the relatives who stay late.
Hex’s “Shatter Claus” is not the Santa you know. ‘Though he might be like the Santa we heard about on the fourteenth. Nasty rap.
“Santa’s Little Lamb” is possibly the WORST Santa we’ve met. If you don’t put the cookies on the plate, all bets are off! Spoken experimental weirdity from h_double.
“Santa as Seen on TV” is kneeslapping with a side of irony from The Christmas Jug Band (feat.Tim Eschliman). They haul washboard!
Also, look out b/c “Santa is a Creeper!” Make Like Monkeys retro the rockabilly with warnings about this B&Eer. I’ll violate your habitat! Oh, no!
Hamell On Trial (aka Edward Hamell) folk strums how “Santa Says (Christmas Pandemic).” BLUE ALERT, he’s done with you!
Psychedelic retro pop from Monkey Grippe posits “Santa Says” as more than just a children’s game. Groovy.
Tom Mason jazzes up the pop with “Santa Says Keep It Cool.” You heard him.
Getting ethnic, Colin Buchanan, Greg Champion play “Ryebuck Santa” as a good ol’ boy from Down Under. The kazoo may undercut her gravitas, but don’t mess wittum.
The Creams play “Santa Says” as a seres of dictums from Ol’ Chubby. He seems to have become radicalized, however. Uh oh. Retro pop.
Mush mouthed, “More Balls Than a Christmas Tree” is a bluesy intro to The Gifter from Dead Freedom. More cutely euphemistic than outright outrageous.
“TRAP SANTA” from Pineapple Posse is the BLUE ALERT mammajamma you don’t wanna be writing lists to. Rap for the bestial holidays.
“That’s No Santa,” that’s just my name, intone Cemetery Gator in this odd pop tell-all. It’s tubular (bells).
“Nothing for Santa” is the base complaint from The Resolutions (feat. Emma Rowley). Come on, guys! At least a pair of socks! Band rock that rocks.