Merry Mistletoe: hiphop BLUE ALERT

Rap starts out as scat, right? Louis Armstrong? How about Koreans playing around. eSNa have a “Mistletoe” song that borders on rap. No, what do YOU think?

New the Pharaoh gets the real rap on stage with “Mistletoe.” Female exploitation ensues. And profanity. And carrying on.

Secret wanders around the party to make arrangements with his babe. “Mistletoe Song” is the softer side of rap. He’s going to woo the woman.

T-Rock dopes the rock with “Smokin’ Mistletoe.” It’s flyin’.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3DcagyV-Iw

Merry Mistletoe: bands big and small

Let’s make a production out of the mistletoe melee, shall we.

Piano bar noodling can cover a lot of octaves. Jazz clanker, Trevor McShane is all over the place with “Too Much of Me (Mistletoe Song).” Now remember, jazz is not the wrong notes–it’s the notes you feel.

Travis Cloer amps up the orchestration with “(Baby It’s Cold) Under the Mistletoe.” What a show stopper! Or a door stopper, it’s pretty dense.

Hey, what about classics! Margret Whiting leads the band with “The Mistletoe Kiss.” It’s 1940s fun for all ages (well mostly under 12).

Dick Robertson with his orchestra swing and big band the olden days with “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe.” It’s like a whole afternoon of entertainment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpLZTHrgO9Q

Merry Mistletoe: womens

Girl soft folk emo jazz rock plays in the back of many a Starbucks. It’s a mood.

Barely off the pop, Destenee whispers a touch of R+B into “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe.” It’s bit too clingy.

Colbie Calliat embodies that misty yet independent grown gal with “Mistletoe.” She knows what she wants. Maybe it’s you. Maybe not.

Indigo Girls are so cool they don’t sound like girls, or women, or men… just a stream of poetic toughness. “Mistletoe” may sound like it’s begging. It’s telling.

More earthy and motherly, Christina Custode weaves a dreamcatcher of a wintry scene of home and love and jazz with “The Mistletoe Song.”

Angelic sounding Jelly Rocket soar over our heads melodically with “Under the Mistletoe.” It’s almost childlike in its nurturing, reassuring womanly innocence.

Merry Mistletoe: pop

Pop music is for kids wanting to be 6 years older than they are. By the time the subject matter of top 40 tunes is age appropriate, the consumer is so over that.

Thusly, these are largely trash.

Brenna Miles (from TV!) twangs up pop for her “Mistletoe.” You’re eight. in front of mirror, with too much make up on, practicing the nae nae–Go!

Playing the soft rock angle, Colin Healy sounds like a girl with “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe.” It’s what prepubescents pick.

Breathy but safe, Kendall Schmidt autotunes “Blame it on the Mistletoe.” Scream! Scream! Cream!

WHO really wants to be a sexually active girl?! Drag act Courtney Act with “Head to Mistletoe.” Feel like a princess with all those frogs!

Merry Mistletoe: Kissmass, Harris, Earle

Well, let’s admit, the best thing about country western is the birth of rock and roll. Or their bastard stepchild rockabilly.

Mary Kissmass’s “Blue Mistletoe” has all the thrumming bass and wicked guitar changes you’d expect of the ‘billy. It’s cool beans.

Jeff Harris seems to translate modern music into rockabilly with fluency others (Brian Setzer) covet. “Stand Under the Mistletoe” is five by five, man alive.

Johnny Earle ain’t no thing but a chicken wing. His “Mistletoe Rock” ghosts Elvis, but captures a dance spirit you must give it up to.

Merry Mistletoe: Travis, McCoy

Toby Keith plays somnolent with “Blame it on the Mistletoe.” It’s to country music what Queen’s ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ is to punk music. Still, pretty like make out music.

Randy Travis rules understatement in country/western sung emotionality. “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe” sells it without blubbering.

Same title different song. “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe” by Jason McCoy has some Carter Family ah-huhs! and thick slide guitar. And the video is in a bowling alley! What a party (children! chickens!), you gotta be there.

Merry Mistletoe: Hale, Anderson, BLUE ALERT

Lynn Anderson retros the CW with “Mr. Mistletoe” turning a harmless tradition into a suburb or lust and lies.

Lucy Hale (from TV) pops country with her “Mistletoe.” It makes me think all possible lyrics combinations for the subject are already used up.

Then I stumbled over potty-mouthed Kyle Dunnigan. His “Fuck You Mistletoe” has given me the strength to go on, or at least listen to more country scrying subtext.

Merry Mistletoe: Ryan, Brooks/Dunn, Williams Band

Mistletoe is fun! Like bluegrass! Derek Ryan proves it with “Beneath the Mistletoe!” Sing along with the ho-ho-hos!

But lots of mistletoe songs are moodily joyous, read country/western.

Brooks and Dunn belt out the ‘dear’ in “Hangin’ ’round the Mistletoe.” But they just want you to desire responsibly.

For my mistletoe, Luke Williams Band delivers better on the honky tonk with “Mistletoe Baby.” Twangs it to the nearly indecipherable, sweetens it to the legal limit.

Merry Mistletoe: who huh

Most youtube song amateurs are mere children giggling and emulating rap stars. (The funny ones are way too brief.)

A few have the equipment, at least materially, to deliver a song.

Austin Jasay sings out of his range about “Mistletoe.” With his shirt and tie, politeness, and blue hair he’s easy to dismiss. But his song has range and flirts with depth.

Hannah J shows considerable range and intensity that at times reveals emotional fun (the Frosty metaphor) with her “Under the Mistletoe.” Grunge this up a bit with a back up bass and watch out. Sign off after the song, unless you like peeping  in on the lives of underage girls being girls.

Merry Mistletoe: who now

Some you tube artists break out and score millions of views. Most don’t. Doesn’t mean they don’t have passion, verve, rhythm. Usually they do have a crowded crooked bedroom, poor sound, and an itty bitty range of talent.

Ann Wave sings her “Mistletoe” warning Santa not to bring presents (she just wants the right kissing). And she leans into it, overcompensating for the blonde hair.

Thanecha, on the other hand, sets her shot in the decorated front room (and name drops the tree), but seems to be reading off her lyrics and chords from her notes. Regardless, she has slightly more sense of humor and a raw talented voice (singing–her speaking voice grates) that overpowers for the rented guitar. Her “Mistletoe” weeps gladly.