Year-round Yuletide oddities
Some people just festoon the halls and bowers and hearths and passersby with the bells. They just hang there and look pretty–pretty Christmassy, that is!
Driftless Sisters “Hang a Little Bell” as step one in the process of celebrating. Soulful pop you might wanna take notes during.
Join hands and sing in a round with War Pony Dos. “Hang the Bell from the Christmas Tree” is that hippie folk rock we need to chant to create the spirit.
Bells at Christmastime might just be one more prop what fell out the box from the attic when you upended that tangle of merry morass.
A supernumerary, the bell adds to the list in Patti Page’s “Christmas Bells.” (This is an older version.) Scmaltzy romantic pop fun. Byron Lee & The Dragonaires & Friends‘ duet underlines the how-you-doin’.
“And the Bells Rang” let’s you know where bells rate… last. The Golddiggers tip pop into easy listening so nobody younger than thirty will like this, unless they’re buttering up gramma. (This was a year before Bing’s release.) (But a few years after Tex Beneke, Ray Eberle & The Modernaires With Paula Kelly.)
Little Rita Faye cornpones the ham with “Sleigh Bells, Reindeer, and Snow.” It’s a list, read it.
Shad Weathersby adds bells to every aspect of Christmas with “Swingle Jingle.” For kidsong, it kinda does swing.
So dammany bells for the holidays, the mere collision of clapper with shell foretells the season. Ring it out!
Can’t pass up a clever one: “Christmas Hmm That Rings a Bell” quips Dr. BLT with eclectic music fusion. You’re on notice.
Disney tells you what you want. Irina Menzel, Kristen Bell, and Josh Gad belt out a standard show tune (from that ‘Frozen’ holiday extra) “Ring in the Season” …and big finish.
Shuffling pop from Rubettes (feat. Alan Williams) hails us that “Bells Ring out on Christmas Day.” That’s how we know. (Well, that’s how YOU know, me i heard the songs back in Sept.)
Douglas Wagner brings us chorale arrangement for your school/church/prison in “Ring the Bells, It’s Christmas!” a showy show tune.
Twinkle Toes Music tends to downbeat this title. “Ring the Bells, It’s Christmas Time” here is a jazzy kidsong to proffer physical exercise. Sounds like London Bridge is Falling to me, though.
I like the persistent swing of Natalie Taylor’s “Holiday Bells.” Here’s a theme song for the season.
Another bells favorite of the holiday season is from ‘The Lemon Drop Kid,’ some old (1950) Bob Hope rom com. More not-exactly-Jesus type celebrating. And, the skinny is, the original title of ‘Tinkle Bells’ got the 86 from the writer’s wife who knew third-grader slang. If you can sit through the flick, William Frawley introduces the song at first with an angry sidewalk Santa rant. Cool. Then Bob Hope sings it, but Bing Crosby cuts the vinyl of it. Nevermind.
The only novel version I might subject you to would be Johnny Setlist’s “Silver Bells (Ukulele Mix)” from the Goon Christmas 2010 extravaganza. Although I am partial to Rich Hinklin’s reimagining “Silver Bells (Post-Apocalyptic Dance Mix).”
Hey, that one reminds me of the after-the-robopocalypse fun from JMaq: “Iron Bells.” Most ‘Silver Bells’ parodies don’t allow for bells. Screw them, this is far out.
Newfoundland’s own Snook sermonizes on the difficulty of living it up given urban oppression in “Swingin’ Bells.” Too much vernacular by half, innit?
The 1980s gave birth to housewife talent like The Fallen Angels, a Portland weird-ity who parodied classics especially around the holidays. In the spirit of the original, their “Clanging Bells” is a denouncement of noise pollution especially the Salvation Army’s.
A couple more songs about the ringing of the horse drawn carriages for Xmas.
Jane Hutton big bands up the saccharine silliness of “Song of the Sleigh Bells.” It’s a whirlwind of tympani.
Charity Shop Sue drives through her “Sleigh Bell Time (Again)” with an insistent increasing tempo garage backbeat that suggests you better defuse that bomb–NOW!
Another luscious li’l nugget, this time from The Benefit, who unfairly grouse about having their beach blanket bingo song ruined by the addition of “
The mainstream delivers ‘Sleigh Ride’ every holiday season, an instrumental from The Boston Pops (1949) first with words from The Andrew Sisters (1950). Yeah, it’s a Christmas mainstay, but –yawn– it doesn’t –ho hum– help with the –what was i talkin’ about–?
A couple of versions you should add to your novelty collection spun out from this joyride are inspired by the vapidness of the added words. Mojo Nixon plays around with the nonsense syllables, and Barenaked Ladies just scat. Take that, wordsmiths!
You should also know, Anthony Daniels (following orders) makes this non-denominational number a lesson for robots (Star Wars and otherwise) to learn the spirit.
Parodies don’t bring it either. I can do without John Valby‘s tasteless BLUE ALERT schtick. Joshua Gilyard‘s Queen of the Ratchet neither amuses about gossipy girls. The Bible gets a fun synopsis to this melody by Jacob Manning. Jason, however, explains why school band members don’t like this tune.
We know Santa’s sleigh has bells, ‘cuz it’s a sleigh. Guess who else’s sleigh has bells–everyones! Sing that to a pipe, city slicker!
The Cricketones are back from that album i grew up with playing “Ding-a-Ling Dong, the Sleigh Bell Song.” Which means you can sing-along all you want, ‘cuz that’s the whole set of lyrics pretty much. Kidsong gleefulness.
Some kids’ toon showcased some dumb plodding tune perhaps called “Snowflakes Fall, Sleigh Bells Ring.” We’ll get into it later, but this laundry list of Xmas details does not a carol create, gang.
Here’s one you might know: Gene Autry intros and burbles through “Sleigh Bells.” It’s so happy and all that it feels like you’ve been eating too much sugar.
I guess a little ring-dingy is just what the comical ordered when it comes to trolling the tropes of Christmas. Santa + Bells = mad libs funny. Here, here, i’ll show you:
“Jen de Melo’s Jingle Bells” twists up Lady Gaga.
Jim Jim takes on Lizzo for FM 104 in “Santa’s Bell Song.”
Scrooty Mcboog modulates his flat stylings in “Sleighbells Ring.”
Joel Kopischke does more of an homage than an actual parody with “Ring a Ding Ding It’s Santa.” Still worth it.
Who needs a studio full of equipment?! The Withers deliver again with “Jingle Jingle Jingle.” Parody without the sauce still smacks my lips.
I remember an ancient comedy bit with Paul Reubens as Pee Wee Herman on David Letterman’s The Late Show. He shook a coffee can full or rocks (or summat) and chanted the acerbic host’s name again and again with every rattle. That constant noise brings madness. So with Santa having to listen to that gay get-out-of-the-way chiming of the bells from his sleigh all night.
Be Your Own Boss Entertainment irks out some rapping with “You Hear Them Bells Go.” Santa’s not so happy now.
The Soundtrack of Our Lives retros a blazing ’60 Invasion beat with “Jingle Hell (Stuck in a Chimney).” I’m not following the lyrics all that much, but i gotta share this monster mash.
Sleigh bells mean Christmas most exactly when they are attached to Santa’s ride. Say, now that you contention that… can’t say as i recall those pimp nodules extending from Big Red’s vehicular contraption. I mean, i can hear that sound–but, is it magic or music?
The Kelly Girls swing the answer with “Jingle Jingle, Mr. Kringle.”
Enter Santa, cue the bells. And dance!
Surely you recall “Jingle Jingle Jingle” from the 1964 Bass Rankin stop motion ‘Rudolph’. Stan Francis sings as Santa in a show tune way that has imprinted on many a child.
Most spell-binding is the gentle country folk of Isaac Stancill’s “Jingle Jingle Twinkle Twinkle.” Both a lullaby and a horrorshow, this midnight encounter with Master Claus will leave a lasting impression–or will it?