Category: R&B

Christmas heartache songs are a dime a hundred. But let’s narrow it down to the 8 or so songs that claim 100 and cry about your absence, baby.

Rapping about how bad loneliness is ’round now “Christmas Alone” BLUE ALERT from Nerd Lady (ft. Divinity & Kali Crews) reveals feelings at 100. A wild ride.

Paul Kelly (feat. Vika Bull) admits I wrote a hundred times to Santa for you to appear on the “Christmas Train.” This wailing soul makes you wait to find out if the dear rail-y one makes it. Worth the wait.

Eric Clapton updates the swampy blues of Freddie King‘s “Christmas Tears.” (For a hundred years or more (you been gone) You came back and hang “Merry Christmas” on my door). Slays that funky music, white boy.

“Somerset Solo” seems to be about holding onto love with the barest of fingernail grips. This alt-indie mess of poetic sniffling from Matthew Milia offers: Here’s what I got you for Christmas this year, dear –A seashell which, if you put it to your ear, hear Me crying like a hundred manger babies. But with garage elan.

Emotional pop from Tommy Lellan about how it sucks to be “Done on Christmas” day: I hope I won’t live for a hundred years Without someone to spend it with Until that day, I guess I’ll have to bide my time.

Strains of Bellum misses the wife (and the dog and its poo) 100 days and more while stuck in some war during “A Metal Christmas War Love Song.” Honest head banging.

Did the Pandemic keep you apart–during the holidays?! These hundred-hour days are gonna bring me to my knees, complains Jacob Oman in “Social Distance.” Choppy R+B wants to cuddle up for Xmas.

The Russian Futurists realize that a short-lived romance in summer leaves a hole when it’s “100 Shopping Days ’til Christmas.” The R+B bebopping rap counts the calendar without taking a day off. Swing along.

365 is not enough Christmas. Try it all the hours of the day, all the days of the week. (But not all the days of the month.)

rwsrvnt interrupts his “White Christmas” celebration with the point that, being from Florida, he’s used to a time and place Where the tree tops swing And the ocean breeze Is 24/7. Calypso electronica, but it drags a bit.

The Jonas Brothers also phone in the love song “Like It’s Christmas.” See, Twenty four seven Every inch of Central Park Is covered in white This could be heaven–‘cuz it’s with you. Watered down pop.

Girl harmony rife with purrs and slurs, “25 Days of Christmas” doesn’t seduce so much as put you on notice: We’re gonna share 25 days of Christmas baby, 24-7 with the family. With, yaknow, game night & chores & and & picking up ‘fore we go to bed. I guess. Weak pop–sorta soul.

Slowed down, low impact musicality works better with the bedroom-eyed R+B of Matthyaz. “Let It All Go” admits, I need some presents I might need some snow And you in my arms under that mistletoe I want this shit 24/7. You are just a piece of the perfect picture, bae. Standoffish works for ya, yeah? (Melted me, a bit.)

Perhaps in a drug trip, Merry Christmas wails Don’t hold onto me, I am an aeronaut Merry Christmas Emily Flying Battle Lulls 500! “For the Lulls” is a folk storm of a mess and i love it.

Even more hallucinatory, “It Feels Like the Christmas 500” is experimental DJ mixing from tomoe. Was that a Muppets song?

Emil Beckford is wondering how I’m gonna find 500 bucks to pay for you a surprise in his R+B charmer “Focus on the Love (It’s Christmas).” So he won’t have to, or get socks from you, he’s going to retread the reason for the season and make it about the feels. Kisses not lists. You good?

Christmas is about giving, and giving is about sharing, and sharing is about relationships… all you need is hearts. Don’t wait ’til Oregon Statehood Day, be in love on 12/25!!

C. Robert Walker cha-joogies the R+B like it’s at the last holiday ever in “A Thousand Kisses at Christmas.” Two shades off disco ain’t doin’ it for me, gotta say. Good luck t’ya, though.

Nell B. (feat. Isaac Johnson) is looking for a thousand times under the mistletoe as well in the auto-tuned rap “This Moment.” Seductive or just sinuous of melody, i’m not sure i’m buying this either.

Not saying it’s easy. Rhyan Besco (feat. Corbin) has tried a thousand times to make you notice so he can get that “Christmas Kiss.” R+B chatty playin’. Maybe a little desperate.

Let’s finish up the ending all ready!

Plank Road Publishing finally returns to the blog with the swinging “Blitzen’s Boogie.” Kids know this one.

To balance the sweet, Santa’s Angry Elves get gargley metal with “Blitzen’s Got the Shitzens.” Cue the laughing bikers.

The last reindeer gets a fine comedy treatment in “Blitzen Jones the Mighty Reindeer” by Philly Cuzz. This tinderbox of music box and TV specials flies when i sense ’60s Motown ballideering parody. Delicious.

By the sixth reindeer, the names/identities seem to be drawn out of a holiday hat. Since Cupid could be Valentines’, Xmas, or cathouse–we’ll take what we can get.

Cupid hisself (the Canadian rapper) leads us with his “Cupid Shuffle.” Almost no imagination is required to transform this dance number to a Christmas context. Now kick.

Vixen’s fixin’ to turn heads.

Santa named a reindeer after me, claims Elizabeth Chan’s “Vixen.” Backbeating R+B for the siren.

Starhearts’s enchantin’ animal “Vixen” is a fine blend of funky R+B and smoky jazz. Other reindeer are in fact told off lyrically. The female has spoken.

Somehow that Star of Bethlehem became a wingman to help you fall in love. Hallmark will make a Christmas movie about anything! (Mostly we mean the Love of God.)

Beat Digger (feat. Richard Schletty) belly dances a portentous “O Star of Mystery” which may not be real romance, but it fills his heart. So there.

You are “My Christmas Star” gets a DJ mushing when Ariose (feat. Definition). It’s love, just not eternal. Pop.

The Supremes feel His love from that “Little Bright Star.” Motown agape, hunh!

Not sure how long those wise men took to follow that star (from Nativity to Epiphany), but it must be tiring to fission that hydrogen. So, how about just a GLOW?

Ricky Skaggs does that blue-collar retelling of Joseph and Mary country music loves with “New Star Shining.” It’s still shining today. Powered by some pink bunny battery or sumfin’.

Simon Wolfe gives us a Motown serenade against some south of the Border brass for “Beneath the Stars.” It’s like a Santa-Jesus mix-up dream.