Month: February 2025

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And for those who fail the peek test?

The Grand Gestures speak their truth/rap in “I Never Saw Mummy Kissing Santa Claus.” Apparently NOT seeing such results in a life of quiet desperation. It’s a TED Talk in resignation.

That Francis P. Church editorial from over a century ago gets the gospel treatment from Andy Beck in “Yes, Virginia, There’s a Santa Claus.” Here, seeing ain’t nothing.

“Baggage Claim” from Smash Mouth allows nostalgia to ruin all those childhood myths, including: never saw Santa’s face. Proper rock for the disenfranchised.

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And what you saw… it WASN’T Santa?

Eric Lewis reprises “She Mistake Me for Santa Claus.” Raucous Carib.

“Daddy, Is Santa Really Six Foot Four?” Kay Brown wants to know, when reporting the scene she dug the night before. There may have been Mommy-kissing and Daddy-threatening, so i dunno what’s going on in this household, but that ain’t him, babe. American Song-Poem R+B.

Funkdoobiest raps some BLUE ALERT name dropping in “Superheroes.” Did I see Santa? No, it’s the Green Lantern. Understandable.

Royce D. Sean takes a country minute to point out “That wasn’t Santa Claus” in the manger. You’re seeing someone else. White beard, judging good/bad, giving… mistaken identity.

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Welcome reprise from Make Like Monkeys whose devilish plans of theft cry out for entrapment: “Mine!!! Rub Out Santa.” Classic retro pop.

BLUE ALERT Psychopathic Rydas caught Santa, so they shot him in the tough as nails “Ryda Holiday.” Nasty rap.

“Waiting for Santa Claus” is the improvved synth rap from Youth on Track about just staying up and being aware of one’s surroundings.

Fitz and the Tantrums caught Santa under the tree. It was not good. “Santa Stole My Lady” is mighty fine doo wop about a dastardly holiday.

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Silly little ones! Andre Nickatina · Equipto rap “Eye’s Of A Child” about all those dumb things they deduce from visual experience. Including catching you-know-who. Sounds like someone’s got a hard-knock life.

Lil Fashoti may have caught Santa in Vegas like Tupac, but he keeps shooting deer in his swaying and synth-drunk “Chrimuh Time.” Wake up!

Jamie O’Neal thinks she caught Santa swimming in a red Speedo down in the “Gulf of Mexico.” Jazzy country about Xmas down South.

Peek on Earth.24 BLUE ALERT

Big Peeza has gotta catch Santa in the rap “Is This Christmas?” Childish mischief.

Damani & Snoop Dogg plan to catch Kringles when “Twas The Night Before Xmas.” But then who’s the guy in the hoodie coming out the chimney?!

Fabolos has had it. “I Don’t F*#k with Christmas” offers to mess up the bearded one if he catches him. BLUE ALERT big time from Funny or Die.

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Going to the extreme of kidnap has been touched upon here in the yule blog:

Merry Criminals! kidnapping

Blind Fury continues the BLUE ALERT crime spree with sight-impaired rapping in “I Kidnapped Santa Claus.” The motive: presents.

Kadesh Flow takes inspiration from the Jack Skellington deal as in their “Our Christmas Town” my goons are down to kidnap a Santa. Melodic rap, without all the angry nastiness. Thanks.

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Even cowboy chillun reckon they might catch ol’ Santy if they stay awake all night, as mentioned in Michael Martin Murphey’s “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day / Old Time Christmas.” It’s real country, real soft and quiet.

When Snoop Dogg covers “Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto” he admits he might also want to catch that same guy. Rap it, droopy eyes!

Thrice a Chuckle’s “Operation Santa Claus” is a twisty rap about getting some jolly. Not all goes to plan.

Jacobsen Brothers get the whole gang ’round when “We’re Gonna Catch Santa Claus.” It doesn’t end well, but–Kazoo rock!

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The “Santa Trap” as told by M.O.S.C.O.W. does not go as well as expected. In fact, this garage rock gets down right grisly. Eww.

Awesome Paul Simon parody from KinGGeeK “50 Ways to Catch​-​A​-​Santa” never gets to the refrain, but it delivers wit and bitchy comedy for all.

Aggressive folk from Kier Byrnes outlines “7 Ways to Catch Santa Claus,” it would seem just to snatch more presents. Yet the rollicking breathless fun of the presentation, plus the addendum of what to do when you fail, redeem this party. And all 7 steps are explained.

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I’m thankful for the reprise of Make Like Monkeys with “What U Got?,” a sinister retro pop tale of accidentally awakening for Mr. Claus–but then going into full hostage taking mode. Grand theft Santa.

The lead titles for the 2008 LionsGate cartoon movie “Gotta Catch Santa Claus” (starring William Shatner) (based on the comic book) has the same title, lyrics, and jazzy cool you’d expect. Carl Lenox sings in a laid back kinda way. It’s only to prove he’s real to non-believers

The Fun Squad are also “Gonna Catch Santa Claus” but their showtune sleaze is in order to get answers to the hard questions. Think shortstuff heist.

Andy Beck and Brian Fisher heap on another grade school number “Catch That Santa,” a sneaky swing kidsong that seems to have fewer morals than the others.

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Will we ever CATCH Santa Claus?

Well, David Phelps has a plan for “Catching Santa.” Marvy bossa nova with a seductive tango beat. A stun gun? Night vision goggles? Delicious!

Daily Bumps Family also decides “Let’s Catch Santa.” Family rock about taking a hostage. Uh oh.

Finally three-year-old Angelica yanks Santa by the ankle while she sings “I Caught Santa.” Kidsong with all the good and bad qualities of the genre.