No, no, no. Not smashing the romantic button here. Sometimes it’s two different people in one song. Take a feature…
For example Matt Ouimet realizes The time is near For two best friends And holiday beer in the over-orchestrated kid(?)song “Christmas Wouldn’t be Christmas Without You.” Watch out for the killer ending.
Also counting family members Wes Borne raps about how I got the whole team and they thick as thieves: Got a good girl with a faithful heart, Two big bros and a brand new niece And parents. Guess that’s more than two total, but “Mistletoe” is party rapping! ‘Suplifting.
Also big with family is Santa Claus. He don’t come around no more in Wild Earp’s rockabilly “Cynical Christmas.” Scandalous? Father Christmas, he don’t come around no more; He’s got two kids in Nashville, he’s got one in Singapore And he don’t pay no alimony and he don’t pay no child support.
Not as crowded is “This Christmas” with Rubber Lightning. This island beat pop worries, Another year unlike any other I thought we’d see a sister or a brother or two. But it hopes.
Sometimes, we slip in the overly sentimental, though. Becca Steiner reminisces about two young faces standing in front of me giggling, wondering if THAT is “The Tree” for Christmas. Generations pass. Tinkly pop that does tug at the pacemaker wires.
Then there’s the righteous. Two little people look up from their beds to wonder all about the mythical elements, including “Where Christmas Goes.” That is, after the 25th. Turns out it never did, according to Sawyer Brown. Slow dance (sorta) country.
Let’s decipher some James Brown. He he sing-talks, Not only to you, to God, number one, To you number two–he means two entities, yeah? “Let’s Make This Christmas Mean Something This Year” may have more than one meaning. Soul, baby.
Sharks Teeth get Dada with their “Marxist Christmas.” Grungey rock that pits Two masters of flesh ‘gainst one another: Jesus and Karl Marx. Not sure who comes out on top. It’s a glorious mess.
Gotta hand it to E. Quipped (feat. Cutright) who masterminded the rap battle “Mcclane vs. McCallister.” With ‘Grinch’-y narration and snarky one-upmanship, these two Christmas legends have at it. The outcome may be unclear in this song, but compare box office totes, my peeps, and you may be surprised.
The two devils in “Hi My Name is Kevin” is a whole ‘nother rap ’bout that movie, wherein The Wet Bandits are the pair. Here they clearly don’t compare, but despair, in need of repair… something something… derriere.
Ballad time from Brendon Dalton and the 1740 Boys Choir, again. During the final hunt of the Urak-Hai for the Halflings, Merry and Pippin, it’s “Christmas for the Ents.” In the aftermath If you should find a halfling (or two) Pick ′em up and sing a song. Great fun.
Even though “There’s No Christmas in Hell,” Bnny Rbbt uses high-pitched pop to point out all the signs of the holidays: Every snow globe′s magic scene Holds two ice skater figurines, f’r example.