Month: February 2022

Christmas Countdown: 1000†

While we’re lighting up the holy days let’s honor the Son of a Gun with… well, candles. Heart’s “Here is Christmas” begins with a little ‘Bring a Torch’ but deftly girl-pops into a soaring paean of… someone visiting the Earth. Candles really dress up a place for deity.

Evie popularized “A Thousand Candles” about shining on Jesus, but I like it from The Ten Tenors. More power from the boys. Hymn-lite.

Gina Naomi Baez sets her “Christmas Candlelight” (her heart) against a thousand nights. Alt-gospel.

TobyMac (feat. Owl City) hard beats the pop in his rap “Light of Christmas.” This is the good of all of us, this light. Then a thousand angels are singing out–so now it’s sound not light. I guess.

“A Thousand Cookies for Christmas” lures us in with complex bi-lingual rhythms and sweets, but Angel A. Alvarez settles with that friend of ours, Jesus. That’s the reason. NOT the cookies. Just to be clear. There are no cookies.

Christmas Countdown: 1000

A thousand is like a lot. More than you could hold, puppy-wise. So get ready for the hyperbole section of the countdown (like millions wasn’t too much… though, Romans used M for 1000 and called it mille, ‘cuz a thousand thousands was like inconceivable). Christmas, after all, can be THAT much.

“Silent Night” by Klip! Klap! from ‘Carol in a Box: A Christmas Musical for Children Young and Old’ is NOT the song you are expecting. Sure it’s pretty, but that’s because of the thousand lights ever twinkling. Percussive kidsong.

While we’re into the luminescence, Alan Jackson associates the Xmas city with where a thousand lights glow. (The country just gots the mistletoe, duh-huh. “Let It be Christmas” is gentle pop with a twinge of country.

Let’s go to God. The Carolleers sail through the hymnal “Now Light One Thousand Christmas Lights” to make the dark skies bright, which will signal the season, but–hey–let the Fire Marshall know, ‘kay?

Christmas Countdown: 1200

Party rap from 69 Boyz, Quad City DJ’s, K-Nock and the whole Quad City family off the dam fine Quad City All Star Christmas album asks whatcha gunna get him/her for that special gift. The boys ask for a twelve disc changer and on and on. The girls start with twelve hundred dollars. So “What You Want for Christmas” makes our list of numbers. Worth it at the given price point.

Christmas Countdown: 1-2-3-4

Counting up is going the wrong way, but The Cheeky Girls layer Eurovision on top of innuendo on top of cheesy pop to open “Have a Cheeky Christmas,” a must-have for any novelty fan. Everybody pumping!

The Nameless go funky garage off-key with “Xmas Time,” when they wait for your plane to land: 1,2,3,4–go for it!

Alternating ‘twixt English and Japanese, “Christmas Town” by Santa Paine (feat. Purplepeople) counts off to love, ‘cuz they’re young. Gentle alt-pop.

One of my formative favorites, Madness, sillily stumble over intros (Hello, this is Woody… 1,2,3,4…) like it’s a dress rehearsal–but the ska comedy of “Inanity Over Christmas” with its Jimmy Cagney gangster movie references, world tour stop name-drops, and bitter cold complaints is casual jollity. Like a Beatles fan-bonus? Or a shout-out to Bonzo Dog, perhaps. Any way, one of my new happy places. (Excuse the cover below.)