And a Party in a Pear Tree: Filipino, policemen, pirates, Ohio City

What kind of Christmas party is this?!

Melanie Anne Pademal may be a bit judgey when she pop raps “Filipino Christmas Party.” There’s required drinking, i think. Still, i had fun.

Five for Fighting bar scratch a fun-filled “Policemen’s Xmas Party” song which turns out is more showtune party rock than social criticism. Thanks!

The Wiggles play like ADHD children for “It’s a Christmas Party on the Goodship Feathersword.” Ghastly kidsong.

“The Ohio City Singers Christmas Bash” is a Stones-inspired soul rock sung by The Ohio City Singers. Daresay they know what they’re talking about.

WAR! metaphor

War can mean so many things. And we’ve run out of left vs. right songs.

The Ohio City Singers have painted us a breakup of holiday proportions in their “War on Christmas.” Power ballad rock with a sloppy slice of soul that unseats Ares/Mars and shoos up Eros/Cupid. Call Van Morrison!

WAR! PARTY!

Did someone say War on Christmas? Get your dancing shoes on!

Quichenight’s “Funky Little War on Christmas” is all the soundtrack you need to shimmy into and out of any argument. Cool

Dependent Claus: stalked her out of it

Is she obsessable? Mrs. Santa Claus is the pinnacle of–her type. Matronophilia? Some guys lose it over that sweet homemaker image.

Maniacs got it bad when they transition from cowboy to pub rock as “Mrs. Claus’s Lover.” Sad, but rollicking.

The Dan Band flame the torch high with their letter to “Mrs. Claus.” Droll prog rock putting her up on a pedestal. Love the line about not even knowing her first name.

R Kelly gives it up for his soul soaring R+B “Mrs. Santa Claus.” Is he the new James Brown? Or is he powered by love? Heavy.

WHAT ELSE? Epiphany Sequel

Back to our regularly scheduled savior: Epiphany is a Christian feast day that celebrates the revelation of God incarnate as Jesus Christ, celebrated sometime after the New Year.

Christmas is that birthday moment, but the three wise men showed up later. And after that John the Baptist did his thing. So, the holy deal is a moment somewhere further along the calendar.

Let’s have a song!

Melissa McCrory gives it her all with the wandering gospel of “Epiphany Song.” It’s the thought that counts.

Martin Little’s amateur hymn “Epiphany Song” is just as off key. But sincere. That’s what matters.

Let’s call in the troops. The Epiphany of Our Lord Centenial Liturgy get down and Gregorian with their “Epiphany Song.” Now i get it.

Raising up to the rafters, Raymond Egan leads the congregation with his “Epiphany Hymn.” Soaring.

It’s All Relative, non-white

White people have family problems, from dysfunctionality to red-neckery to, well, racism. People of color may have the occasional hubbub and brouhaha, but when they are family they ARE related. Share it!

Lambert Wilson captures the calypso canticle with “Family,” a raw expression of love for the folks.

A little more island music from Clifford Clarke’s “Family Christmas.” He’s got the family love, so he’s wishing it all around the world. Unity, mon.

Motown plus from James Shelton, Kuipiio Livingston, Peggy James, and Christopher L Poole flips for joy in “Family.” They build a love fest.

Karew Family rolls into some Motown rap with “Family Holiday.” Nonverbal expressions of wonderment and happiness.

Lizzy Morris ups the R+B to gospel with “Family Christmas.” She feels it, she means it. That’s love, baby.

Curtis Turrentine relies on the beat with his soul-ful “Family Christmas.” More stories. (And a ‘Family Affair’ mash up.) But they’re synced up.

Soul disco from Steven Drayton, Tony Terry, Kizzle, and The Messenger bounces and pops out “Family Christmas.” No lie. Just fun.

Bloodstone layers on the soul (and disco) to elevate “Christmas Day with My Family.” Beautiful. And they greet you at the end of the song (with family stories)! Now you belong!

Sing a Song of Singing Songs: party time

Laying into the music, Shannon Doyle burns up the home studio with “Just Another Christmas Song.” Fun acoustic rock that shreds more than shares.

Chris Rudd (feat. Marcus Colbert) get all Motown disco for what i believe is a sincere musical trip into “Another Christmas Song.” Hiphop vertigo. I mean wow.

Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings name drop some carols and sample some trads, but the soul they bring to their sing-along “Just Another Christmas Song” moves the dance floor to come up and getcha. Oh yeah, i think that’s a kazoo.