X-claim: gosh/golly BLUE ALERT

A couple more euphemisms for GOD!

Oh by gosh by golly begins the Frank Sinatra signature carol “Mistletoe and Holly.” Everyone else who covers this aches for the natural swing The Chairman brings to it. Yawn. Let’s give it up for The Boston Gay Men’s Chorus to change the tone just a scratch.

Oh, Golly Jolly” by Durnst and Friends is the excitement of heavy drinking for Xmas. Hand clapping soft pop.

Oh by golly have a Holly Jolly Christmas” goes the middle of the Burl Ives hit. Point of Grace livens this up way down home style. But, let’s punk this bitch up–BLUE ALERT–with The Sheckies.

X-claim: ay/oi

Hey is terribly useful, so it has been adopted by many languages. I can’t be bothered to pursue the etymology, so we’ll assume other languages borrowed our grunt.

Ricky Martin pairs with Rosie O’Donnell (flashback!) to bemoan how bad a shopper we is in “Ay, Ay, Ay, Its Christmas.” This wants to be corrida, but it’s tequila pop. Close Harmony Friends jazz this up with a cappella boss nova. Trust me, it’s better. (Jipsta gets gender fluid with his mad rave rendition. Ai, papi.)

No Doubt’s “Oi to the World” is the punk cure to The Vandals. It’s a fun musical journey, not like the offending scratch of real punk (which neither are–sell outs!).

Oi Oi Oi! It’s Christmas Time” is a folk/blues blend on the dregs of punk. Sorts lays it out like a reflective wintertime carol. But there’s hope in it. Deal, wankers.

ad silentnitum, cyclical

Loop de loop, round and round we go, Christmasses to the right of me, Xmasses to the left. Who can sing that?

Kevin Sisson performs “Another Christmas Eve” as some hoedown love fest. This cowboy roundup picks, grins, and twirls. Yee ho.

Another Sad Christmas” as vocalized by XANSEII is a rap dirge of BLUE ALERT depressed proportions.

Another Sad Christmas” from Damien Quinn in BLUE ALERT snide rap about friends and family–and self. All losers.

Another Sad Christmas” by Mr. Toxic is electro-rap rife with daddy issues, unrequited love, economic woes. That’s enough.

Sterling and Loscalzo up the beat just a skooch with “Just Another Sad Christmas Song.” This pop breeze is dedicated TO YOU. So, be sad, wudja?

Release the rock! “There may Never be Another Christmas” twists a political agenda into a Santa wishlist. And if justice and fairness aren’t presented–Oi! Oi!–there may never be another Christmas. Quid pro quo.

ad silentnitum, withoutend

Here we continue to go.

Anthony and the Brothers in Christ haunt us with disconnected vocals in the almost R+B “Another Christmas.” Too slow to cheer, to whispery to exalt.

From ‘Another Fucking Christmas Play’ comes the grim revelation that this Xmas thing is nothing new. “Another Bastard is Born” is simply turning the page in the trailer park setting. Irresistible pretend gospel.

Oh no! begin The Yobs for their rock-punk “Another Christmas.” For an angry rant, it’s rather tuneful. I CAN take it.

Carol Told by an Idiot, 3 (BLUE)

Party, hold, party, wait, party, can you last until–Xmas? ‘Cuz then it’s time to party.

Ready or not CrossTie want to get ready, set, “Christmas Again.” Sounds like chores, but the underlying heart is festivity. The rock told me that.

Rikki Jai lays down the calypso beat to let you know “It’s Christmas Again.” You can’t see it, but i AM dancing. (‘Snot pretty.)

OI! the real party is the loud party. Bonecrusher punks out “Christmas Time Again” to the pogo crowd. Go big or go to the bathroom.

Wait for Good

Allow me to uncork the good stuff, songs i’m pretty fond of concerning the wait on Christmas. These first few might go by fast, like sour sweets. Gulp when ready.

Parodying a proper punk anthem (like there ever was such a thing) Two Inch Winky start the party with “I Can’t Wait for Christmas.” Pump up the volume and open the door. They’ll do the rest.

Perhaps starting out as a kid song that hit folk, turned at garage, then hyperred up some soul, “Waiting for Christmas Day” by Big Little Lions plays to many audiences authentically. Talent’ll do that.

Goofy garage from The Morning Glass (as The Christmas Friends) warms up the ice. “Can’t Wait for Christmas” pops and spits (Santa doesn’t love me the way my parents do–) with lots of lala lalalas for everyone to enjoy. (Punk parody outro totally optional.)

Can’t Wait for Christmas” is off in just the right ways for a punk promise of merriment & joy. Music Infection riffs and roughs up the fun, adding a pleasant melody just for a larf.

A Near Thing -26

What are waiting for? CHRISTMAS! Who are we waiting for? SANTA! Santa? Did you see him? Get outta the way–it’s Santa, goddammit!

Let’s start with the antique country pop of 1971 (it’s not country… it’s not pop… it’s lounge Americana) “A Whistle and a Whisker Away.” Lynn Anderson accomplishes a recording about patient children with little memorability, and no feeling.

Florence K gets unhooked jazzy (just this side of jump blues) with “Santa’s Almost Here.” Despite the energetic musicality, this is by-the-numbers sentimentality.

Originality boosts (barely) the James Leo Oliver easy-listening song “Ready or Not,” herein retooled to be sung by Santa getting set and going for Christmas. (Points, too, for the sneaky Santa-Nativity crossover.)

Jerry T Band gets dadrockin’ with “Santa Will Appear,” a bombastic pop-rock attempt at kidsong where this much enthusiasm becomes a little scary.

Marc Amendola adds metal to your stocking with the “I Almost Met Santa Claus” song. It’s jolly and regretful as only gonzo punk can capture.

Spin me some fat daddi-o wax from the ‘Fifties and i’m yours! Huey ‘Piano’ Smith and His Clowns wail some N’awlins soul on “Almost Time for Santa.” Warms me to the core.

Tree Lights

Blog here has covered trees and their decorations extensively, but let’s see what we still like while plugging away at Xmas lights songs.

Elevation Music pits Jesus-loving falsetto with kids’ music sentimentality in “I Love the Lights on the Christmas Tree.” Hate to tell ya, but i’m getting a synesthesia-headache…. (Even when Alan Price solos it.)

Continuing with our spiritual tree decorating, Jane Sieberry runs a chorale fantasy around and around with “Are You Burning, Little Candle?” It’s a hymn for her.

Beleaf (feat. Frank Puppet) raps the joy into the reveal with “Light It Up (Christmas).” Quite a house warmer.

Several oldsters make solemn with “Let’s Light the Christmas Tree.” Let’s keep it to a barely resurrected 1948 crooner from Jack Brown & The Three Jills. It’s about missing those far away (serving in WWII).

Bearkat takes a lively big band sound and amps it up with millennial pop in “Hang the Lights on the Tree.” I’m dancing now.

Blinded marches out their industrial punk march “Candycanes and Christmas Lights” to catch your joy off off guard. Yet this DIY decoration course may add a new touch to your annual routine.

Trouble with Lights

Because we all love the Bob River’s song about one of the pains of Christmas being those gee-dee lights, we’ll pass on that one. Who else hates the snarling, tangled, uncooperative beasties?

We’ve heard some of these before. Oh well.

Getting them out was the problem for Watkins & The Rapiers with their Argentinely syncopated “Christmas Lights Untango.” Tee hee.

Checking them was the problem for Brian Kinder with his oompah kidsong “Blinking Lights.” See, for a Midwesterner, the term blinking is like swearing. Har de ha.

For a neighborly commentary, Z100 concocted that wacky rude pop blues number “Your Christmas Lights Look Like Crap.” This is olden comedy, so offensive was the new black.

Ian Sands has something I recently discovered (beware: talented amateur). “I Hate Christmas Lights” is a punk metal dad band pop number that ranges over random cultural references to make its (with hard to understand vocals). Still, tip of the hat to South Brunswick High School art teacher Ian Sands.