With those antlers you’ll polka someone’s eye out! “Yorgi the Yodeling Reindeer” saves Christmas Day (yet again). The yodeling acts like active sonar to find the sleigh its way through the fogginess, doncha see, jonny? The Grandsons, Jr. padiddle the pickle out of this corn. Ya, shewer.
What kind of reindeer is Rudolph? What kind of nose? Oh, dear.
Homophobic humor at its ’90est, “Rudolph the Deep-Throated Reindeer” Is Matt Rogers at his most unapologetic.
“Rudolph the Big Dick Reindeer” is the unowned parody that also needs to be forgotten.
College Humor tries regular hard with “Rudolph the Regular Reindeer.” Shouting, but not that much.
Better from Kevin & Bean’s Shakespeare Man:
“Rudolph the Blue-Nosed Reindeer” from Barney and Hector at least adds cha-cha-cha.
“Rudolph the Green-Nosed Reindeer” from Smartz Crew add some marijuana. Yeah. BLUE ALERT
“Rudolph the Runny-Nosed Reindeer” also unowned attributes the symptoms to sampling his drug-mule sideline.
“Rudolph the Psycho Reindeer” is unattributed bro-humor wherein the boys crack each other up. Then justice is served.
“Rudolph the Mohawked Reindeer” is Primate Punk’s punk BLUE ALERT aggressive answer.
“Rudolph the Union Reindeer” takes us another direction completely. Organized by Ariana Eakle Blockmon.
The Christmas Jug Band help a smidge with “Rudolph the Bald-Headed Reindeer.” A Jimmy Durante tribute.
From the top you’ve got no where to go but down. The fall of Rudolph is usually field by alcohol.
“Rudolph is a Drunk” is fine raging metal from DØMT.
“Rudolph got a DUI” is not so fine country from Bill Engvall.
“Rudolph the Gin Nosed Reindeer” is fine punk from La Vasa. Just piss poor parody.
“Rudolph Drank the Moonshine” is fine bluegrass by The Christmas Hillbillies.
“Rudolph : The Untold Story” is fine polka comedy from Yulenog. (Amazing sax solo.)
C.C. Moore pasted names (probably of his favorite ponies) onto the mythical reindeer that pulled Santa Claus’s sleigh. Unless they’re running lyrics through the old memory banks, most people can’t name them. Or apparently feature them in cool novelty Christmas songs. But we’ll do our best to showcase each caribou, try to sidestep that additional one, then look at all the also-rans.
Kitty Well has previously compared Rudolph to “Dasher with the Light Upon His Tail.” Not sure the geography of who has what bioluminescence where, but this country sweetener is for the kids.
Zupe and the Polka Commandos apply swinging beer-barrel fun to “Dasher the Reindeer.” Formerly the lead puller, the Rudolph-envy here includes having to look at ass all trip. That joke gets old, but the music rocks.
The Mall Santa is way over a hundred years old, despite the ‘A Christmas Story’/The Simpsons pilot/Billy Bob smearing you’ve recently seen. Check out 1947’s ‘A Miracle on 34th Street’ for heaven’s sake. But whether it was Colonel Jim or someone else, keep in mind the dressed-up fakir you sat on to snap a cry-your-eyes-out pic started as a Salvation Army recruit ringing a bell and begging alms for the poor outside the meccas of marketing.
Check out the bell-ringer folk ballad from Larry Nestor: “The Kettle.” This finger wagger should tweak your capitalistic conscience, but tends to fall flat. Proselytization should bring a little more impact.
A sad, tinny recording of the Yogi Yorgeson revisitation of “The Street Corner Santa Claus” barely does justice to the classic sentimental 1954 oompah novelty.
Locked up for the long haul gets old. Days come, days go. Then Christmas is in there somewhere. No family. No festivities. Hmm.
The Professor Brothers get oddly falsetto bee bop calling out roll on who’s in a worse mood for “Prisoner Christmas.” Tone down that boo hoo in the refrain, guys.
Charlie & the Bhoys get lugubriously Celtic with “A Prisoners Christmas.” A little boy gets a lecture in how they endure Xmas in lock down. Political prisoners, actually. Tiocfaidh ár lá!
Showtime at The 4th Annual Joe Iconis Christmas Spectacular, December 18, 2011. “Prisoner’s Christmas Song” from Ray Munoz chains swamp blues to musical. A bit scary for all its silliness.
Bashing and crashing on the guitar Matt Roach offkey-rocks “The Inmates Holiday.” There will be orange violence.
“Christmas in Prison” is the appropriate dirge to count the lost time to. John Prine has just the right gruff hoarseness to bring you way down from the merriment. The Boxmasters add a bit more life to it, though. Maybe a skoosh deadpan. My favorite cover of the Prine pining comes from Doug Legacy and the Legends of the West. Sad, yet a party.
Then i discovered this monster concept album Payday 2, A Merry Payday Christmas, the soundtrack to a videogame. Simon Viklund is the composer at Overkill/Starbreeze which developed ‘Payday 2.’ So he made this bad-ass musical about a caper and the resultant “Christmas in Prison.” Rock the prison blues, man.
A handy dandy means of communique since the 1970s (for some), the elctronic-mail didn’t quite bury the USPS but it has become the default unfiltered word vomit for our age. Whatever you think–there it is! (It’s replacement is in the works.)
More giggly silly children’s drek from some Broadway lyricist sung by 13-year-old Kara Oates (voice of Dora the Explorer), “S.A.N.T.A. Dot Com” is all show tune (piercing, man, piercing).
Even worse is the so-called precociousness of Treypac McKaughan, who at not-quite-three, squalls “I Wrote an Email to Santa Claus.” I hope he asked for ADHD treatment.
Son of Hog gets the snotty kid routine down with “I’ll Just Send an Email to Santa,” a bouncy beerhall twist of sarcasm we can all sing along to.
Ahh, the office Christmas party… a fine tradition since –1945?? Certainly offices have been our lot since before Scrooge and Cratchit. And parties are a staple of the Roaring ’20s. But the idea of stiff, formal relationships unbuttoned for an evening revealing the inner reveler–that comes down hard for the returning WWII vets, the sudden money Mad Men.
What do we have to look forward to at such a spree?
Some songs carefully document the beginning, middle, and urrgh! Like Ray Stevens’s “Annual Office Christmas Party.” Our humorist counts out the hours: from hopeful (easy listening) to crazy (jazzy conga). Kick line!
Canned Hamm & Friends (Neil Hamburger) introduces the usual suspects at a carnival rouser, “Office Christmas Party.” It’s a comedy song and wants you to know it.
Lauren Robb’s “Office Christmas Party Song” partakes of parody (‘Santa Baby’) detailing the horrifying hookups, inappropriate jokes, overdrinking, and exhibitionism. Cutesy.
More upbeat parody from Goddammit Jeremiah wherein the “Office Christmas Party” sounds lovely, just lovely. Pop con gusto.
The complaint of the salary man finds salve “At the Office Christmas Party” by Supposably. Kicking alt rock swing and sway. He got it out of his system ’til next year.
After an impressive bass intro, Roseate makes social commentary about her “Office Christmas Party.” But it seems to be with love. Or it’s the alt-jazz bounciness that defuses. I’d go.
Let’s go back to 1949 with Yogi Yorgesson’s “Christmas Party.” This Swedish big band burner is sexist and dismissive of overdrinking, but that’s the fun of comedy!
It’s not just any Christmas Party.
Professor Steve cracks corn with ‘grass folk at “Grandma’s Christmas Party.” The (sartorial) journey is the party.
For Mel Waiters “Xmas Party at Grandma’s House” is an important element in family strength. R+B shivering with the gospel power.
“Nick Kwas Christmas Party” is an introspective depressive fever dream that really has no party parts whatsoever. But the alt-rock soldiers on. Try on your gift from Sorority Noise, but keep the receipt.
“Mrs. Miller’s Christmas Party” from Quarrel starts out slow. The polka punk rock, however, increases in tempo and aggro until we know ‘it’s the best party in the land.’ Glad i was there.
Do you like Christmas Parties?
Matthew Wegienka doesn’t keep you guessing. His oompah off-key “I Like Christmas Parties” wends through the usual good stuff, but has a surprise reveal.