Christmas Countdown: 4 wheels/feet

In a Stinkin’ hot December Melanie Gray travels Australia: Pack up my swag and head off Down a 4×4 trail road, Following the stars Where all the wisemen go. It’s all in the service of an “Outback Christmas Tree.” They’re more scary than Noble.

One of the reasons “Santa Stole My Girlfriend” was the ride. In this he sang/she sang, she barbs: So I know you have 4 wheel drive but…I left the car keys on the table–The sleigh is much more stable. Chris and Bri leave things up in the air, but this goofy pop/country is not turning back.

Thrice a Chuckle fell on the ice, hit his head, and saw a “Red Sled.” Others are skeptical of this rocking revelation–Even though it has four wheels, I know you know it’s real. Believe, you fools.

Drivin’ Home for Christmas” Fralphie Jenkins realizes he’s forgotten something. Pop rocking the search I′m down on all fours, seeing what I see: I’d rather be home by the Christmas tree. Wotta revolution’ development.

I think there’s snow in “Winter Song” by Januzzi Watchmen. You see, when they pop harmonize: Four feet below you is the ground–i get the chills.

A charming rap take on the Grinch, Bswift’s “Stealing Christmas” tells the whole tale, introducing a girl named Cindy Lou No taller than 4 foot 2. She’s a Who, not a ho, bro.

Shivan has a whispery banjo fantasy in the folk “This Christmas.” That time, that kiss, leaving footprints in fours in the snow… ahh, love.

Christmas Countdown: 5 measure up/down

Some songs can’t wait. Anthony Bvlgari is a bit succinct in his pop “Winter Break.” But here comes the 5, 4, 3, 2, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! Get a calculator.

‘S not all kid-stuff. Motionless in White counts down in FULL BLUE ALERT the horrors you’ll get (from 5 to one) when “Santa’s Pissed.” Raging metal (that samples Family Guy).

Secret Santa” from Geneve (feat. Leroy J Stillness) bilingually haunts us with bluesy pop to take us from the best of holidays: 5.4.3.2.1 Get ready for new years.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Let’s go; Let’s kiss under the mistletoe-Make this the last year that we’re only Christmas lovers, croons Tom Cridland in the jazzy pop “Christmassy Christmas Lover.” Almost cheesy.

I can count my blessings 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and You, sweet sings Jalen Jones with schlocky pop that still isn’t cheese. “By Christmas You’ll Be Mine” almost chants hypnotically the whole seduction.

Leona Lewis R+Bs “One More Sleep” from one to five for her baby to get home for the holidays (and presumably interrupt all sleep).

How tall? You must be a South Pole elf with your 5’0″ self, rap-plains Arthur Ray (feat OSOM Stretch) in the bitter “Baby Come Back (B4 Xmas).”

Coming Home” for Christmas is a countdown for Lori Oz and her pretty folk music. From 18 miles to 10 to The sign says five more miles. Baby that’s not too far. Can’t wait.

Christmas Countdown: 6 okay

White Lucy is fighting to stay in the cheer zone. I can’t feel right Give you my time… Gave it all to my worst friends Who ruin “Xmas on the Westside” Like progressives on the left side: 3 drinks in. 6 shots deep. The rap roils.

Sharks’ Teeth is here to synthesize my realties: Brain is the source of self And Mars is the source of power; I long, Long to exalt you now–You six dimensional, Six minerals. “The Christmas on Christmas” is psychedelic light rock to expand your eyes.

Millennials get confused easily: “How many times can we put the lights on the tree? Watching Gremlins when it’s 6 degrees” Lovers Turn to Monsters want to know in their gentle garage wandering “It’s Weird to Think There’ll Always be a Christmas Probably.” Have some fun, guys.

Cold enough? Does that “Snowflake” have Six sides stab through me like ice picks? Wew Lads Tbh have the experimental pop music answers for you. Holy metaphorical breakup, Santa!

Meghan Trainor counts on her “Naughty List” to pop about how unfair it is. But it just goes to And six, I’m so tired of this That’s my Christmas list. Playful dance nonsense.

Deepa Sashadri also limits her list of “Resolutions” to 6 [Gonna work harder and save up some money]. Bouncy pop for not taking it all too seriously. So there.

Preaching to the Floridians, BKj-52 & Spechouse rap “Best Time of the Year” to the unaware [But you in the snow with ya six kids Smashin’ through the road in ya town or ya district (Uh)] to get into the spirit. Uplifting.

Not trying to one-up on the baby savior, but does “Gold, Frankicense, and Myrrth” compare with jewelry, instruments, and Anna’s best was cute A six-foot ted, called Ted. The Mistletoe Tappers jazz up ukulele folk with carnival music, hyper pop, and silent movie chase music.

Christmas Countdown: 9 years old

Nine years old is about right for digging the mysticism of the holidays. ‘Ceptin’ maybe the desperation of loneliness that prompts lyrics like: You say you’ll always love me like You love your hamster that died when you were nine. Laasko’s “Hang Me in the Christmas Tree” is party rock that softens the icy isolation.

Also disturbing is the admission Had a crush on santa Since I was 9 years old which begins “Christmas Crush,” a headbangin’ garage rocker from Home Grown. The sexual role playing to come, however, may backfire.

When he was nine, the narrator’s mom got shipped off to Iraq. Eleven, he got the new she was KIA. Dad, a failed rocker, went to prison… “Pumpkin Songs” are the Smashing Pumpkin tunes the dad aspired to. This experimental garage weird-out celebrates the anticipation of dad coming back home for Christmas. Give this Getting High in Dubai sojourn a minute, would ya?

A note’s still scribbled in my spine From Christmas day when you were nine, announces “The Book Beside Your Bed” (the Bible, y’see). Hayden Joseph leans earnestly into the country music about how to rediscover goodness. Touching.

Sorry, but Hanson time. Don’t matter if you’re nine or ninety-eight, Everyone’s waiting for the chance to say: “Finally it’s Christmas” begins their pop rock entry into the forgettable Xmas song playlist. Yeah, they were still trying in 2017.

Now Jonnie never got his wish December 25th, That’s what he said when we left the orphanage Nine years old is the broadside salvo from TobyMac. But “This Christmas (Father of the Fatherless)” turns into an uplifting R+B rap mashup of heartwarming family making. Who’s your Daddy?

Finding the joy outta inner city Chi-town Back back back when Ronnie was 9, TiRon & Ayomari make the rap/pop “I Wish It Was Christmas Today” a pretty postcard from hope central. Spirited and spiritual.

Folk rock from Kevin Taylor takes us down “Christmas Tree Lane.” It’s like memory lane ’bout that girl: She was maybe 8 or 9 and her Heart was bursting at Christmas time With memories and melodies. This summary from older regrets plays romantic AND lonely art the same time.

If you fall over the motion picture musical “Searching for the Spirit of Christmas” lemme know. I find no traces (but the soundtrack) on Google or Roku or anywhere. The titular song, involves Alisha Nordquist looking with the aid of a glowing ornament her mom gave her when she was 8 or 9. Lots of gender fluidity. Silly pop showtune.

Christmas Countdown: 10 yo

Unwritten Law (feat. Sum 41) begin gently: Remember when I was 10, Looking forward to Christmas again… Then they rock. “Unwritten Christmas” ends rappily in the today when they observe the seasonal distribution of their albums to other kids.

R+B is not a sanctuary usually for the childhood memory, but Nobody thinks my life is hard because I’m nine years old, But soon I’ll be ten and practically grown up–Is it a crime to cherish this happy time? Chris Nicolosi struggles through a tough winter, but he’s got that snowman on “Snowman’s Day.” That’s an imaginary friend you can dress up!

TobyMac (feat. Leigh Nash) projects the age: It’s like I’m ten years old again And everywhere I go I can feel it. Party pop presents “Christmas This Year,” a lesson in appreciating God.

Also nostalgic for innocence, Corban Phillips returns to his best of Christmas past in “10 Year Old Me.” I don’t want to forget what it felt like back when I was 10 So bring all your holiday cheer, let’s do it again. Soft alt-rock for the whole family.

Richard Marx plays the maudlin card with: I still remember when you were maybe 9 or 10 Afraid of shadows on your wall; I would hold you tight. “Christmas Mornings” puts the age on the object not the subject, making me wonder how tragic the parenting got.

When hard pop begins: Back when we were ten, we were the best of friends.
But who knew back then, that this love would never end?
i’m not guessing Xmas. But “Christmas Past Present & Future” synth-rocks the hard sell on romance during the holidays. Submit.

Working through a breakup,Melanie Jay alt-pops her anger: Sorry to all the ten year olds who have to hear, But i’ve known since I was like 3… (…something something about Santa, can’t get into her lyric spoilers right now). Regardless, “Naughty or Nice” is a sweet walk down betrayal lane.

10 years old is old enough to prophecy, monitor, and evaluate the whole Christmas scene. Matt Roach’s protagonist wants to cut the crap and bring on the “Toys for Boys.” Like rock now.

Best at recapturing the good old days is James Hersch, banging the folk/rock passionately in “Day After Christmas Day.” Ten year old boy Floating his new toy On the pond at the park–Let the good times start. It ain’t all joy, but it does bring some.

Christmas Countdown: 10 longer units of time


Pandemichristmas” ages a society: Stuff my stocking with hand sanitizer;
I feel like I’m ten years older and wiser
. Sauce on the Side raps this with mask in cheek.

Feeling like seven was great around Xmas for Locals. Ten years later, looking under the tree The same rush flows from head to my feet, I run down and grab the biggest gift I see. “Christmas Time Feels Right” is echoic pop that celebrates moderately.

Missing the vanishing traditions [haven’t had a white Christmas in like ten years], Fifth Lucky Dragons begin a new tradition–VHS!! “Nostalgic at Christmas” has spot on electronic pop silliness.

joby the artist tenderly pops us with “This Christmas (I’m Boinking Santa Claus).” BLUE ALERT, however, it’s good for ten years. After that the verb changes.

Swerving into tragedy, Brenn Hill puns ‘Fine and dandy, Lord, it’s a “Hard Cancer Christmas.” Plodding country that worries, then returns to that stricken kid 10 years later to see survival and a little hair. For Christmas Eve. Yeesh.

Sorry, a slight detour now… “Barry Manilow Got Stuck in Sausage Fibers” by ColdmaN5 is an experimental number about the pop icon about to sing a Christmas song but webbed and scared, then reliving his PTSD ten years later. Thought you should know.

And while we’re weirding–from the musical from the movie ‘Catch Me If You Can,’ “Christmas is My Favorite Time of Year” pits Frank Jr. against Hannity in a duet, where the investigator hopes to see the conman again–when he’s serving eight to 10. Slow showtune from Norbert Leo Butz · Aaron Tveit.

Bucking the trends, January Lanterns are impatient. “I Know It’s Not christmas for Long” is a marvelous sentiment (just saying), especially when: The store shelves are empty and the discounts a many, Our toy boxes have no room, Haven’t heard carolers in ten years or twenty. Soft folk pop. Ruminative.

Christmas Countdown: 12 days some more

Not the same song, but Christmas and 12 days mentioned are still rampant. “All 12 Days” is a remonstrance from Bah & the Humbugs for you not celebrating (and getting the time off work) for the complete holiday. (Warning: original ’12 Days’ are included in here.) Still, fun exhortatory symphony.

Humorous filtered rap from lil dimwit, “Kill a Tree” pokes fun at the mad trads of the season, including 12 days of Christmas movies.

Insisting it’s not all about the stuff Fan_3 wants you to know “I Love Christmas.” This bongo beat pop eclectic mix pairs great gifts for days, including family time. Aww.

Misery makes for good music: Anyway It’s been twelve days, Now your tracks are filled with snow croon-mopes Karma Queen in “What’s So Merry?” Descending pop chords that spiral into fractals.

Church Pants also dreads the worst, like when it “Rains on Christmas.” Tinkly altpop that muses over Cleaning up ornaments of glass, Waiting for twelve days to pass. Dreamy.

Angelic pop from Lorena McKennitt wishes us for Twelve days in the year much mirth and good cheerIn Praise of Christmas.” (Actually it’s ‘Drive the Cold Winter Away’ but more evangelical.) Uplifting.

Rufus Wainwright’s excellent 99%er folk tale “Spotlight on Christmas” measures of plight of the workers (Christmas hours) over the rich (diamonds and pearls): You could measure it in blood, You could measure it in mud; Let us say for these twelve days Put the measurin’ away Cause it’s Christmas.

Christmas Countdown: 16≥

Pullin’ sixteen, coaches shoutin’ ho ho ho Who needs a sleigh,Santa’s Got a Choo-Choo Train” honky-tonks Blake Shelton for all he’s worth (which it guess is a lot [100 million]). Good country fun.

The antidote for that would be Macabre’s “Holidays of Horror.” Simmons went crazy, Murdered sixteen, Fourteen of them family; He killed them For the holidays. 1987 spree-killing in Arkansas presented in music hall metal.

That reminds me of Set It Off’s classic metal “This Christmas (I’ll Burn It to the Ground).” and by it, they mean: One thousand gifts, and sixteen trees all lay in a heave in a cul-de-sac, I strike my match, and I drench the trail of gasoline. Yeah, it’s like that.

e. d. slyter gifts his wife with an Xmas song every year or so. Recently he sang the folk ballad “Sixteen” (as in I love you like we’re sixteen–I don’t mean that as a good thing). He admits to being a control freak and going through her stuff on a regular basis. But, hey, it’s Christmas.

Christmas Countdown: 20

A frozen moment in poetry, “Coeur D’alene Lake Christmas Eve ’98” by Harrison Lemke haunts us with night before ghosts: The lit up numbers on the microwave Say it’s still Christmas Eve for twenty minutes longer. Eerie pop.

I can only sense earnestness rom “Christmas Eve (Where Reindeer Dare) (Mommy Can I Go Out and Carol Tonight?)” a metal masher from Lamonta. When they cheer Can’t believe my luck Grandma sent me 20 bucks! i believe in the true meaning.

Welcome back to Angry Johnny and The Killbillies! “Twenty Years Ago This Christmas” is more cornpone folk strumming, but–this time–i think the cheater/leaver isn’t gunned down, cleaned up, and buried in the backyard. The sad protagonist, however, may not make it.

Cady Groves sees Papa around Christmas for 20 years behind bars. Their “Crying Game” includes too-soon demises, poverty, and apathy. It’s a pop song to wake us all out of this misery matrix, but it’s so pretty i’m lulled.

Wil E. Haze is BLUE ALERT rolling by with 20 nah rims and Christmas Trees and more… “O Chronic Tree” is smokin’ rap of moderate naughtiness.

Also way down home, comes the country slow-burn of “Christmas Like the Movies.” Richard Watson drawls about Santa, who was barely twenty when he began work in the factory. Mrs. Claus is at the Walmart. Rudolph still thinks he’s some big deal. The iconic image of Xmas feels a million miles away. Now i’m sad.

Christmas Countdown: 25 [party]

Every fifth song about Christmas mentions the twenty-fifth, so we’re not going to play that game. Here are the NEW RULES for songs with this number: haven’t linked them before, and they’re GOOD. (Gotta be at least a 6.) This way we’ll keep this enumeration to a week of posts.

Ali Lohan comes prepackaged, corporate-approved, and formulated, but “I Like Christmas” is the bouncy mindless pop that meets minimum expectations. I bounced.

My Christmas” by Louis Leiva may be a tutorial for those not so fluent in English, but this pop declaration marches to a party spirit. Dance!

Begrudgingly, Fresh Breath rolls out “It’s Christmas Time Again.” Old time country rock with a surly attitude when it comes to family: It’s holiday party season, There’s an open bar with a tip jar So I over serve myself And I’m drifting mid-conversation.

Also resigned, Southern Tiers call out It’s finally time to unwrap the best time of the year with lounge-y pop in “Finally Christmas.” Moody, but danceable.

Yoko Oh Yeah gets on the grunge side of folk balladeering while hunting for mushrooms to celebrate, bc–natch–“Santa is a Shaman.” The winter solstice comes for them with three days of darkness  On the 25th the sun is born, let’s have a trippy mass. Daylight’s not here, man.