Category Archives: blues

The Rude Off: proud

Fans abound for the most famous reindeer of all.

Kidsong likes the counting song, hence “Nine Counting Rudolph” from Brian Kinder. Catchy, but not his best.

Asiansploitation and Byron S. mock Lourdes with their “Rudolph.” It’s all about–

“The Reindeer Song” by Daniel Dennis and Mason Douglas (as Sno’Rida and Mista’Toe) white-rap out the credit due the nine. Celebratory shouting to commence.

“Hamildolph” is the epic parody of ‘Hamilton’ from Eclipse 6. Worth the time reliving the bullied fawn’s tale.

“Gee, Rudolph Ain’t I Good to You?” is the Nat King Cole classic funnied up by The Christmas Jug Band. Unrequited gift-bringing is so bluesy.

X-claim: ay/oi

Hey is terribly useful, so it has been adopted by many languages. I can’t be bothered to pursue the etymology, so we’ll assume other languages borrowed our grunt.

Ricky Martin pairs with Rosie O’Donnell (flashback!) to bemoan how bad a shopper we is in “Ay, Ay, Ay, Its Christmas.” This wants to be corrida, but it’s tequila pop. Close Harmony Friends jazz this up with a cappella boss nova. Trust me, it’s better. (Jipsta gets gender fluid with his mad rave rendition. Ai, papi.)

No Doubt’s “Oi to the World” is the punk cure to The Vandals. It’s a fun musical journey, not like the offending scratch of real punk (which neither are–sell outs!).

“Oi Oi Oi! It’s Christmas Time” is a folk/blues blend on the dregs of punk. Sorts lays it out like a reflective wintertime carol. But there’s hope in it. Deal, wankers.

X-claim: hey (pt. 5)

Hey is a rock ‘n’ pop staple in songs to get us to sing-along. Altogether now.

Red State Update want us to all touch each other (until the song gets ruined) with “Hey It’s Christmas.” They tried.

Just Crackers (family friendly this time) try the pop “Hey Hey It’s Christmas” for all of us to join in. You go ahead.

Eva-Maria Kramer goes full symphonic hymnal with “Hey, It’s Christmas.” Klunk.

Lift those voices! “Hey Hey It’s Christmas Day‘” is watered-down Pacfica-beat for the (churched-up) family as posted by Melissa Lesealii. Itchy, i mean catchy.

Sing along with Stephen Weeks, or not. The polka-tastic “[Hey Ho] Tell Me What You Want for Christmas” requires participation to be family fun. Consider me a conscientious objectifier.

“(Hey Everyone) It’s Christmas Time Again” is that rock song that sounds suspiciously like that other rock song. But Chris James is fully earnest and energetic, so–what’s next?

Leaning into Brit-pop, Brett Vargo’s “Hey Christmas!” comes in loud and proud (DON’T BE LATE!!). You can shout if you want to– i’m good.

“Hey Christmas” is Lucas Hoge’s countryfied pop ballad that expects the crowd to wave lit phones. Couple hallelujahs for good measure. But my cell’s dead. So….

O.K. You want the goose to loosen your chair-sittin’ muscles? Here come The Mavericks with some blues rock (watch out, Jerry Lee Lewis) to push and pull y’all in every which way: “Hey! Merry Christmas!” (’till the cows come home).

Carol Told by an Idiot, 17

Did someone lay the blame on the return of Xmas blues at the door of the bank? Is it debt, that’s worryin’ ya, Johnny?

“Broke Again This Christmas” is Mike Rob howling offkey about trying to keep up with your wishlist, baby. Painful ballad. Then bad rap.

Country pop from Retrotech (is that a metronome?) worries the season with “Broke Again This Christmas.” Is there a light at the end of the shelter?

More to the point, punk whinging from The Mansfields allow they’re “Broke on Christmas Again.” Didn’t expect much other.

Jordan McAlinden winds down the Britguilt with a lighter pop number “‘Tis the Season to be Broke Again.” Don’t gamble it away, Da!

Mobius VanChocStraw lays down legit blues with “Broke Again for Christmas.” He’s outta money, honey (yours as well). Same ol’ story.

Life After X-hello–

The party’s moved on, the house has emptied–what’s that echoing sound?

Well, Santa is feeling the sudden changes. With hard rock blues, Big Johnson and The Thrusters troll the ancient Yuletide carol with “Day After Christmas.” He’s lonely now.

Soothing crooning from Walt Hoagland: “It was the Night After Christmas.” But it’s without you. So it actually sucks.

Measured blues from Steve and Jacky Cox, “The Week After Christmas” regrets the whole damn year. Glad that it’s over. Poor me. (Good song.)

Life After X-not so loud

Now that the subject’s broached, let’s linger on that hammering headache you woke up with after Xmas celebrations.

Twangy country from Ron Bell drawls out a portrait of family failings in “The Day After Christmas.” Lots of broken, missing, hurting with a lively backbeat.

Rangy grunge from The Held retches out unfortunate life choices in “Thank God (Christmas is Over).” And, for good measure, BLUE ALERT.

Kent Goodson and Michael Panasuk look up from the mess of “The Day After Christmas Blues” and swear off bad habits, like conspicuous consumption in all its forms. Piano lounge blues.

Authentic music arrives in the form of “The Day After Christmas Blues,” country-funnin’ betwixt sharp guitar licks from JS Lawrence. This is more hangover regret iced with feeble promises.

Wait, Baby

What’s so wrong about Xmas? Well, she’s asked for luggage as a present!

Joseph Bradsahw & Nikki Lane spar about their bickering in the fun bluegrass “Wait ’til After Christmas.” For the kids. (Okay, i chuckled.)

John Greer tinkles out the blues for a grand ’55 sad song “Wait ’til After Christmas.” Wailing, not wassailing.

A Near Thing -20

Sometimes what we look forward to when Christmas is round the corner is the companionship and reunion of loved ones. Well, for those who can stand other people (cheers to ya).

Carly Simon draws out Livingston Taylor‘s “Christmas is Almost Here” as an easy-listening tribute to commonplacities. Finding a partner for the dance? Is this Prairie Home Companion?

New Nashville Revue’s “Almost Christmas” is honky tonk pop swing about being alone and jealously side-eyeing other lovers. Downer topic, downer genre mashup.

Unplugged, singular, plaintive folk/pop makes much more emotional impact, so take it away MYMP with “Soon It’s Christmas.” Heartstrings strummed. (Carol Banawa does this breathily and sexily; half a point off.)

Laying the blues on a piano bar smarm, Marc Broussard is begging for home with his sorrowful “Almost Christmas.” Lighters out!

Mall World: double take

One of the problems with Santa at the mall is that (in the old days) we had malls every few neighborhoods apart. So, when Daddy had trouble finding the right gift for Mommy at the Center, he had to go to the Square, then maybe to the Consortium–and darnitall if they’re weren’t a Santa at each and every one! It’s enough to give a child a double take.

Bunch of Believers spell it S-K-A with their “So Many Santas.” Then they ruin it with a sermon about how all those Nativity scenes only have ONE baby.

A cappella masters The Bobs slow the roll with the epochal “Too Many Santas,” reprised here for your sanity. As is Gayla Peevey’s “77 Santas.” Kids see the darnedest things.

Hokum appear! Hal Willis kidsongs the trouble of “Santa’s Clones.” Holy Dolly the Sheep, kidlings!

Canned Hamm and Friends bewail the crowds in the “Santa Claus Parade.” It’s a hoot and a half of ironic kid song, though i suspect there may be only one Kris Kringle. Still–the noise!!

Maxwell, Miranda, Parsely return us to the cool setting with their bluesy “Too Many Santas.” Things that make you go hmm.

Mall World: lonely

What’s sadder than a mall Santa with an empty lap?? Nuttin’! Makes me think about missing other companionships….

Smokin’ Joe Pilloud cries out with some smokin’ blues about wanting a little more close-up attention on “Santa’s Lap.” Hey, bay-bee.