Category Archives: big band

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Stand-in in a Stand

Poor resources! While nearly 30 million living trees fall for Xmas each year, in the past few years half that number artificial trees are bought. So let’s not forsake the fake.

This quandry is the subject of the ‘Tannenbaum’ take-off “O Christmas Tree, Reusable Christmas Tree” from Richard Holley. Lively, but with an agenda.

The dilemma is taken to violent levels in the grade school musical ‘Home for the Holidays’ by John Jacobson, Roger Emerson, Cristi Cary Miller, Emily Crocker, Mac Huff, and Tom Anderson. “The Christmas Tree Feud” features both sides in a kidsong sing off. They both win!

A word of warning, some assembly required. The Puffers oompah some old fashioned country rock for their “Christmas Tree Catastrophe.” So lowbrow, it’s fox-worthy. (Now, with the Lord.)

Flocking a tree is still a dead plant, but “We Will Flock You” from The Mistletones is so good, i had to repeat it here in the artificial section.

Quite alt, “Christmas Tree Menorah” is a music hall comedy (?) skit from Three Quarter Ale getting medieval on the tree. It features a long spoken set up, protracted groans, and a final Wonh!

Caribbean steel drums crowd into the lively “All I Want for Christmas is a Big Palm Tree” from Gene Mitchell. It’s so much better than the traditional, Gene follows up with the sequel “Coconut Palm for a Christmas Tree.” Double dipping in the inspiration pool, bra.

Likewise, Singin’ Steve is out on the islands with “Coconuts on My Christmas Tree.” Kidsong that worries about Santa finding the right tree. And Santa’s definitely black.

Apparently Texas has some forestry difficulties. So the McGuire Sisters (in 1956) proposed a party switch to “The Cactus Christmas Tree.” Sanders Family has a more tongue-in-cheek modern hillbilly take. Can’t tell which is more offensive, i likes ’em so much.

Spanish influenced, “Tumbleweed Christmas Tree” portrays a poor family’s second best. Red Steagall & The Boys in the Bunkhouse know and play real country (maybe not USA).

Po’ folk gots to improvise, i get that. But this Loretta Lynn clone “Green Felt Christmas Tree” is so spot on loving ’70s country that i’d pay good money to Ella May Kay. Wowza.

“Hibiscuses’ Christmas Tree” might refer to a business name, or a family name, but this goofy S.Pacific Islander love song is so alternative, i have to believe it’s not a standard Christmas tree. Aloha, Ukelele Santa!

“My Fake Plastic Christmas Tree” is all LJ Jones needs in his gentle folk rock apology. It’s bright enough.

Electronica from Glial Cell (is that a moog?!) extols their free “Plastic Christmas Tree.” Sounds already lit up.

A triumph in housecleaning and safety, Tommy Emanuel’s “Artificial Christmas Tree” is always pretty and really ever-green. Bossa nova club music with a seductive sales edge. Yes, you want that plastic thing now, don’t ya baby.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Yule Log in to My Account

Mistletoe, bah! Cedar pine now… c’mere baby.

Ron Glaser (or is that Elvis?) will be underneath the “Christmas Tree” where there’s room just for him and you. That kind of rockabilly.

More tributes to the King with The Ridin Dudes who also intend their assignations underneath the “Christmas Tree.” It’s a rockabilly appointment, so you know sometime.

All The Cute Lepers want under the Christmas tree is you, honeypie. “The Cute Lepers Christmas Song” is retro pop rock–even Jesus would skip out on his final peace… for you.

Cathie Fredrickson doesn’t need gifts, just you “Next to Our Christmas Tree.” Oh yes, and some kissing and hugging, too. Percussive folk.

A perfect gift for you and me is the side by side presence “Next to the Christmas Tree” for Jay Broadway is intimate, sultry alt-prog-pop. Too close, man.

More only you, this time with more country/western: Sam Mason and Songbird Jones repeat how the “Empty Tree (All I Want for Christmas)” means why-oh-you.

The Zac Brown Band (feat. Sara Bareilles) have nothing but love love love for each other, and it’s all underneath the “Christmas Tree.” Enormous band swing.

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Love Tree Angels

Hey, look everybody! I found one last corner not covered over with stuff on the Christmas tree–The top!

Pretty symbolic. Should be some nadir kinda thing up there.

(And bee-teedubs, that angel might be a metaphor, not actual ornamentation.)

Kenny Chesney country jams “The Angel at the Top of My Tree,” but it’s about his squeeze. She’s not just a heavenly being, see. She’s the acme of the holiday season. She’s pretty good.

Faron Young is a little slicker with his yodeling crooner “You’re the Angel on My Christmas Tree.” Silver tongued devil!

The Christmas Rockers (yeah, generic as their name) woof out “The Angel Underneath My Christmas Tree.” That, for class!

More amateurish, but with feeling, Glenn Diamond seeks out peace on this day from an “Angel on My Christmas Tree.” It might be an actual angel here. Country with electronic bells!

“(Sweet Angie) The Christmas Tree Angel” is a full tale of another unappreciated Santa-helper. This big band twinkler has short shrift from Fran Allison , grrl sweetness from The Spitfire Sisters, adorability from Las Campanitas, but heavenly harmony from The Andrew Sisters.

Earth Mama wants to sing about decorations, but “The Angel Tree” is folk with a lesson (what else is new?): give love!

Michelle Schmitt uses “Angels in Trees” as a brief bit of imagery to kick off her list of loving memories. Jazz folk along.

Just to keep you off balance, let’s hear from the little girls who wish to be “The Fairy on the Christmas Tree.” Henry Hall and The Three Sisters apply a [music hall] different religious aspect to decorate from 1936. (I believe they had Jesus back then, but, well–)

TreeMendous Holiday Fun: Tree Vee Tunes

Cartoon characters like Christmas trees, too. And if you’re a kid, maybe you’ll excuse these songs.

Inappropriate lounge style punctuates “Cinderella’s Christmas Tree.” Her glass slippers hang next to her glass ceiling.

More in the spirit, “Dino the Dinosaur’s Christmas Tree” from the 1964 cartoon episode features Alan Reed as Santa Fred teaching the kiddies with his bouncy spluttering.

Flipside to ‘Suzy Snowflake’ was “Little Red Riding Hood’s Christmas Tree,” a Rosemary Clooney orchestral offering from 1951 that tootles its way around the decorations (you know, big eyes, big nose, big mouth…).

Yeah, there’s a song about it. Lara Herscovitch soars soulfully with “Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.” Her folk pop is more about home and love and Christ and getting away from the rat race. Not sure if the grief is good here. Or childhood values. Or trees, really.

So now let’s grow up! Janyse goes Betty Boop with “Elfy Under My Tree.” Swinging flirtiness! (She has a more womanly torch version, as well.)

Snow Way: just say no BLUE ALERT

The lack of snow is not just another day in December… it makes a statement.

Reese Lansangan is one of those talents you can’t understand is only on Youtube. Her fluent folk pop “No Snow” makes you believe in the poetry of young love.

Anuhea sings “No Snow” as exotic island beat, which makes you wonder how do they know about snow?

More hula-inspired honky tonk in “No Snow for Christmas” from Maureen McElheron.

Brian Protheroe has to make “No Snow Blues” about not getting love, but it’s so bluesy.

Blues rock from Lucky Luke in the form of “No Snow This Christmas.” Makes Elvis cry.

Graffiti6’s “No Snow” goes jazzy wailing over that loss of that girl that time of year.

Stephen Simmons gets cynical with “No Snow on the Ground.” Jazz ballad hates Xmas.

Stefanie Eskew bemoans inappropriate tropical paradises with her hard folk “No Snow.”

Pet Shop Boys, yes the most successful recording duo from the UK, bemoan the lack of standardization with “It Doesn’t Often Snow at Christmas.” It’s meant to do, y’see. Synthpop.

Boon & Millz make the Whoville case “No Snow for Christmas“: love only, nuttin else.

Ditto from NexCyx’s R+B pop “We Don’t Have Snow.” But they do have Christmas cliches!

Etc. from James Henson and his backroom amateur “There’s No Snow at Christmas.” We get it, especially via dad folk rock.

Celine Rae & The 20-73 party rock us with “Christmas Without Snow.” Now it’s all okay.

Chris Messtree (fet. Nico Laus) (yeah, it’s a joke) go prog electronic with “No Snow for Christmas.” BLUE ALERT German influenced chanting, so it like it.

Joe Pesci has a cute novelty number “If It Doesn’t Snow on Christmas” (A cover of the Gene Autry ’49 semi-hit). Have you heard the BLUE ALERT naughty version?!

Behold a Star: Eddie Fisher

Here’s one of those categories that gives you a peek into my methodoise la démence. I have a couple songs that are dedicated to the great songsters of novelty Christmas music. These are so meta-quirky that i’ve already included some in my previous posts. But as a micro-sub-genre these are not easy to find… ‘Let’s Sing Merry Christmas to Gene Autry!’–as a song? As if! But i’ve tracked down (at great expense to my psyche) nearly a monthful, both stalker-weird and ironic-iconic fan pieces for or about.  Also, look for famous folk beside chanteuses and chanteurs to be celebrated celebs in Christmas songs. Finally, fictional characters get seasons greetings, too (I’m looking at you R2D2). They’ll help pad out the month.

And certainly there is some fun to be had with ‘What if Eminem Did Jingle Bells?’ and the like. But i’ll save those pastiches for another month.

[Sorry–i simply must avoid the political spectrum. Governmental Christmas parodies are shockingly short-lived even if momentarily hilarious (thank you, Capitol Steps, but ‘Happy Holidays, Sarah Palin’ is so over).]

Thus, here is a rerun from a year and a half ago: Betty Johnson with “I Want Eddie Fisher for Christmas.”

Fisher wasn’t just the guy that dumped Debbie Reynolds to become Mr. Elizabeth Taylor V. He wasn’t just Princess Leia’s dad. He was a scream-worthy teen idol between Sinatra and Elvis (and landed a couple cool carols in the ’50s). His only big chart hit was “Sunrise, Sunset” in 1960, after which he supposedly became hideously deformed and disappeared from public view.

One more time–Spike Jones and his Orchestra go all out with Linda Strangis and a cool spoken intro for his “I Want Eddie Fisher for Christmas.” It’s awkward and adorable: you know what that means.

Lit up Like a Christmas Tree for the High Holidays

Don’t forget to get all judgey and say boo to booze for Christmas night. Alcohol is bad and kills after all.

Paul Hipp name calls with “Merry Christmas (You’re a Drunk).” He draws lines and names signs. Folk songs come from hurting.

Big band jazz, however, makes the worst humanity glamorous. “No One Likes a Drunk on Christmas Day” especially by Caldwell/Denig/Brinsfield lightens the gloom and doom while wagging the finger at the object of our scorn.

Flako for the High Holidays

The idea of observing the drinker lose volubility as vivaciousness increases is not the discovery of youtube circa 2003. The hilarious descent into stupor is an old nightclub bit at least as famous as Fay McKay’s Vegas routine “The 12 Drinks of Christmas.” Yeah it goes on forever, but do you feel bad for laughing at her incapacity?

Less successfully with the same formula is Frankie Ford. He takes forever to get going and even longer to get funny.

Danny McMaster applies a bit of the old Australian on his adaptation. He slushes right away, or is that his Ozzie accent?

Bill Barclay adds Scottish burr to his. The whole thing needs subtitles. Andy Ramage‘s exact same one comes with explanation.

Jeremy Lion rounds out the Empire with his working class British walrussing, this time with imbibing on stage. Eh wot?

Most fun is Axis of Awesome with “Drunk at Christmas.” Their big band expression that wanders, droops, drawls, and slumps in the corner indecipherably.

Merry Mistletoe: bands big and small

Let’s make a production out of the mistletoe melee, shall we.

Piano bar noodling can cover a lot of octaves. Jazz clanker, Trevor McShane is all over the place with “Too Much of Me (Mistletoe Song).” Now remember, jazz is not the wrong notes–it’s the notes you feel.

Travis Cloer amps up the orchestration with “(Baby It’s Cold) Under the Mistletoe.” What a show stopper! Or a door stopper, it’s pretty dense.

Hey, what about classics! Margret Whiting leads the band with “The Mistletoe Kiss.” It’s 1940s fun for all ages (well mostly under 12).

Dick Robertson with his orchestra swing and big band the olden days with “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe.” It’s like a whole afternoon of entertainment.

United We Christmas Tree Stand: soldier blues

Most of the Xmas songs for soldiers are weepy numbers about little children missing Daddy (and Mommy) serving their country. It’s helped make us great.

Big Daddy Weave cleans up here with “I’ll Be Brave this Christmas.” Standard CW fare. But i’m not sure about pairing tank fire shots with invocation of JC’s name.

The Song Trust trowels it on with “Bring Him Home Santa.” The kid don’t want no gifts–only Daddy! C’mon, Santa. God didn’t answer my calls!

Did i saw Mommies too? Bernie Williams sings country about crying without and dancing with Mom. So, he says in “Santa I’m Writing This Letter.” By the way, his wish for his solja mama matters more than other kids’ wishes.

This is not a new notion, Vera Lynn sings us a story about the WWII era little boy who tells her “I’m Sending a Letter to Santa Claus.” Same old story, big band glory.