Category: altrock

Merry Mistletoe: party warm up

You need hard driving music to get the mistletoe party started.

Wait wait. Softly to begin. Gotta warm up those kissable lips.

Besureis is all about setting the kiss party mood with “Mistletoe.” Mmmm.

Gentle as an opening oven revealing gingerbread, Kyle Harrington sing-murmurs “Mistletoe Song” so nice. You can trust him.

Ghost the Jukebox will foreplay you up with “Mistletoe.” Rollicking and romantic.

Crashing and clashing, party boy Dino Barbiera (is that a party name or what?) leads you to the mistletoe with good-boy promises in “Meet Me Under the Mistletoe.” You’ll be there.

Now Atomsplit will plant one on you b/c they are the “Master of Mistletoe.” Party pucker up!

Merry Mistletoe: harry potter

While we’re upping with people, Harry Potter! That cheers everyone up, right?

Pennsylvanian besties formed a band (The Moaning Myrtles) out of high school finding they were just wild about Harry. Here’s their take on those imaginary critters infesting the mistletoe Luna claims she can see (and ruining moments between Harry and Cho). So, obvi: “Nargles in the Mistletoe.” Is it love yet?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c00zN55N-wM

Merry Mistletoe: FTSK

Let’s bring it down a pinch.

Mistletoe, like all the trimmings, symbolize all the glory and gaiety we can’t possibly live up to for that special time of the year. So it can bum ya out. Bad.

Forever the Sickest Kids (and you thought those bits on sitcoms about picking the band’s name were exaggerated) go alt-emo with “Mistletoe is for Quitters.” They’re trying to get in the mood, but are unequipped to do so. Still, melodic.

United We Christmas Tree Stand: corporate (not!)

Continuing from our concerns over consumptive consumerism, some carolers counter the corporate coverage of Christmas. Cleverly now….

Posh Hammer add robotic irony to their drear tale of corporate takeover of the holidays. “A Very Corporate Christmas” bangs on like a dirge, but these kids have something to say.

“A Corporate Christmas Carol” by Charlie Reynardine & Michael G. Ronstadt lulls us with glorious harmonious pop folk. Afraid the kids win out, however, and these guys will buy their way through the brand names. (They win me back with their credits roll at the end of the video.)

Davids jolly up the joint with “CGI Penguins (An Anti-Corporate Christmas Song).” At least we have a song to sing along with while we throw shade on Coca-Cola.

Christmas List: item twenty (sex act) (BLUE ALERT)

Down and dirty, dudes.

“I Want a Blowjob for Christmas” is off key and drunk. Devastating Just Cause wants your affirmation regardless. And anal, too.

!990s garage punk informs “I Want Sex for Christmas.” Furiously Stiff never quite released this sentiment on the world.

Well, let’s turnabout for fair play. “Anal for Christmas” by Killy the Kid allows her to give to him (It was on his wishlist!). Jazzy garage you can dance (limp?) to.

Toymakers Local 1224: contract-5

The best song to individualize the elf takes a single Santa’s helper out of context of his ride along job and puts him into a love-suffering outsider’s dilemma. Can he find his true one through the window? Perhaps The Rocket Summer’s title “Elf Creep” will foreshadow the outcome. Coolest peeping tom Christmas song ever.