Don’t forget the lighter side of cocaine for Christmas! What was it? Oh, here!
Stage Door Guy deadpans a cowboy ballad: “Cocaine for Christmas.” He’s suffering for his art, but it barely shows.
Aleksei Archer reframes “White Christmas” OF COURSE about cocaine. Subtle, unless actually you listen to it. (‘Schnife’?!)
Christ Sampson pokes the hip hop bear with “White Christmas (Cocaine).” It’s not exactly comedy, but it’s not street. More like lane.
Just as unfortunate a rap number is “Ho! Ho! Ho! (It Looks Like Snow)” from White Lightning, P’Zilla and Chinchilla. They can keep a beat. But the moral of the story is: are we famous yet?
Parody hit and misses for cocaine here. “Frosty the Cokehead” by CC Streetz is a near-miss. It’s so sweet. Isn’t it a sweet one? Bob Gautreau does the Jimmy Durante impression for his “Frosty the Blowman.” Look, Mommy, the old man is singing about young peoples’ problems! sibbaldk in a similar vein tries “Frosty the Dope Man.” Tries. Friday the 25th drops a ghetto beat on theirs. Lickety fun. By this point The Funny Hat of America sound old hat.
Bree Essrig & Brett Erlich go to some trouble to ruin ‘Frozen’ with “Do You Want to Do Some Blow, Man?” I say yeah. To the ruination, that is. (Yeah, this is obvious: Doctor Panglos does this, too. And The Tokyo Fever. And some big half naked tatted up guy named Roccy.) (And lounge hagstress Loretta Jenkins killing “Let’s Do Blow” should be overlooked.)