Xmas Dance Party: ballroom

Not all party-goers are cowboys, but are those other Christmas mixers more fun? You be the judge!

For instance, the celebratory song may not be danceable. In yet another musical of A Christmas Carol, the ghost of past out delights Scrooge with his memories of “Mr. Fezziwig’s Annual Christmas Ball.” It’s declamatory and baritone-deaf.

Modernistically, Ringo Starr makes new sound old with his folksy “The Christmas Dance.” I happen to like this unpresupposing little number about getting up the nerve. But i can’t see anyone getting to their feet here. (Listen for the outro symphonic play out, but watch out for that last note…!)

Coy and playful, Iam Whitcomb has brought us a 1920s sweetmeat: “The Candyland Christmas Ball.” The accordion makes it too sinister for me to party.

Considerably worse is a throw-away cartoon kiddies’ crapshow i found in the 1$ bin at Target: “Cinderella’s Christmas Ball.” It’s got a boogie-woogie pianer banging out the better half of the song. Will the Prince search to see who fits the discarded Christmas stocking…?

Considerably gross is Ren and Stimpy crooking an ankle for the Muddy Mudskipper’s Ball with their “Happy Holiday Hop.” It’s gross to the mass.

Now that i’m bummed, let’s follow Bessie Smith from her party at the Darktown Strutters’ Ball to arrive fashionably “At the Christmas Ball.” It’s slow and low feeling, but i can close dance to it. Real good, i can. Leon Redbone updates this to the “Christmas Ball Blues.” But i like that 1920s’ authenticity.