Santa Jobs: alternative (BLUE ALERT still)

Let’s get with the 21st and consider the LGBTQ alternatives! Is Santa stuck in a rut, or is he experimental at all?

Daveo Falaveo updates old heater Eartha with his “Santa Baby.” Seems to work–except the lip-sync (what song is that guy singing?!).

Just as predictably, Parody Dummy regales us with ‘funny’ falsettos and “Santa is Queer” (from Wham’s ‘Last Year’). Skip the first minute of pre-music. Or all of it.

Slightly funnier, but blessedly shorter, Larry the Cable Guy brings forth a 15 second “The First Queer Santy Claus” to the tune of ‘First Noel.’ Hee haw.

Wooden Steel belabors the comedy out of “Santa Turned My Boyfriend Gay.” This is presented as an ‘improv’ song. Un-improv-ed, if you ask me. Despite the tacked on gender empowerment, it stoops to poo poo.

Although Kip Addotta does this (it’s on the Big Dr. Demento Xmas Collection), i prefer Standstill’s “I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus” ’cause it’s raw (appropriately punk) and has a Seinfeld reference. (Yes, i like it even more than RuPaul‘s throaty ur-diva bit.)

Much happier to out the old guy is Uncle’s Institution garage chortling “Santa Claus is Gay.” These polar scholars reel from tolerance to name-calling on some German TV show.

Too many of these songs have been repressed, so let me just add a couple more from my own collection  (despite their sad association of gay with pedophilia):

The Go-Go Boys are unabashed queer parodists. Off their album Gay Apparel Xmas Songs from somewhere in the ’90s check out “Chickenhawk is Coming to Town.” Fiendishly clever, with a jazzy piano.


Unintentionally uplifting are The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies from a 1998 KROQ Christmas collection with “Butch the Gay Santa Claus.” It’s a party in your pants.